Top 100 Zappa Quotes
#1. I think what my father appreciated was the science experiment of life. He had these kids, and they had their own experiences. He wanted us to discover the world for ourselves.
Ahmet Zappa
#2. You can bet everything will come to an end. It's going to be ugly and it's going to be a mess, and it's going to be something that somebody did in the name of God ...
Frank Zappa
#3. Don't mind your make-up, you'd better make your mind up.
Frank Zappa
#4. My Dad was so open creatively that I was off in search of black turtleneck bathing suits with long sleeves.
Moon Unit Zappa
#5. Nothing I've ever written has been motivated by trying to impact or influence anybody.
Frank Zappa
#6. Sexual gratification can only be achieved through the use of machines.
Frank Zappa
#7. My parents were big music fans, and my dad plays music, so I grew up with Madonna, Frank Zappa, the Beatles, Alice In Chains ... it was all over the place. I had a Third Eye Blind record, but I also had Korn, Courtney Love, and Shania Twain.
Madi Diaz
#8. I think you should leave it up to the parent, because not all parents want to keep their children totally ignorant.
Frank Zappa
#9. Catholic girls with tiny little mustaches.
Frank Zappa
#11. Left me here to cry alone with a bottle of juice and pork chop bone.
Frank Zappa
#12. The only difference between a cult and a religion is the amount of real estate they own.
Frank Zappa
#13. I think that if you use the so-called "strong words" you'll get your point across faster and you can save a lot of beating around the bush. Why are people afraid of words? Sometimes the dumbest thing that gets said makes the point for you.
Frank Zappa
#16. I don't want to see any religious people in public office because they're working for another boss.
Frank Zappa
#17. And, you know, my dad would show me some things sometimes, but the best things that I got to do were to actually see really good players play up close. That gives you an idea of fingering and technique and what not.
Dweezil Zappa
#18. We will have close to 3 months of rehearsals to learn about 30 songs. Frank usually rehearsed a band for at least 3 months. If it took him that long to be comfortable we probably would need double the amount, but It's just not financially possible to do so.
Dweezil Zappa
#19. Frank's bands could play the hardest stuff and make it seem like no big deal.
Dweezil Zappa
#20. Tighten my headband for an extra rush.
Frank Zappa
#21. Cocaine decisions that you make today, will mean nothing later on when you get nose decay.
Frank Zappa
#22. Nobody looks good bent over. Especially to pick up a check.
Frank Zappa
#23. The Very Big Stupid is a thing which breeds by eating The Future. Have you seen it? It sometimes disguises itself as a good-looking quarterly bottom line, derived by closing the R&D department.
Frank Zappa
#24. I proceeded to take that mitten full of the deadly yellow snow crystals and rub it all into his beady little eyes with a vigorous circular motion.
Frank Zappa
#25. Reality is what it is, not what you want it to be.
Frank Zappa
#26. The bassoon is one of my favorite instruments. It has a medieval aroma, like the days when everything used to sound like that. Some people crave baseball ... I find this unfathomable, but I can easily understand why a person could get excited about playing the bassoon.
Frank Zappa
#27. I picked books by their covers - the worse the cover, the more I wanted to read it.
Ahmet Zappa
#28. I'm totally convinced I can write the perfect pop song.
Moon Unit Zappa
#29. I've got a new relationship and I'm trapped in this old life.
Moon Unit Zappa
#30. They were wearing smelly blankets, they looked like Donovan fans.
Frank Zappa
#31. Her head is full of bubbles, her nose is petite, she looks like she never gets nothing to eat.
Frank Zappa
#32. Anybody who wants religion is welcome to it, as far as I'm concerned
I support your right to enjoy it. However, I would appreciate it if you exhibited more respect for the rights of those people who do not wish to share your dogma, rapture, or necrodestination.
Frank Zappa
#33. I had this whole ritual with my mother making the bed with me inside it so I would be invisible.
Ahmet Zappa
#34. Republican is fine, if your a millionaire. Democrats is fair, if all you own is what you wear. Neither of them's really right, cause neither of them care.
Frank Zappa
#35. The last election just laid the foundation of the next 500 years of Dark Ages.
Frank Zappa
#36. Tosses her head and flips her hair, she got a whole bunch of nothing in there.
Frank Zappa
#37. Environmental laws were not passed to protect our air and water, they were passed to get votes.
Frank Zappa
#38. Books Are Good For Lots Of Uses, Not For Dropping In The Toilet.
Frank Zappa
#39. There is no hell. There is only France.
Frank Zappa
#40. I want a horny little Jewish princess.
Frank Zappa
#41. Just because something has tubes doesn't mean it's the best. I mean, tubes are obviously good, but the circuit of this thing is designed well and it sounds good.
Dweezil Zappa
#42. For the record, folks; I never took a shit on stage and the closest I ever came to eating shit anywhere was at a Holiday Inn buffet in Fayetteville, North Carolina, in 1973.
Frank Zappa
#43. Frank [Zappa]'s music was never for the mass audience. His music contains specific kinds of information that you won't find elsewhere in rock and roll.
Gail Zappa
#44. We are not a Zappa cover band. We only play Frank's songs that were recorded by the Mothers of Invention and I think a lot of those songs were complex.
Jimmy Carl Black
#45. The universe consists of 5% protons, 5% neutrons, 5% electrons and 85% morons.
Frank Zappa
#46. Let's not be too tough on our own ignorance. It's the thing that makes
America great. If America weren't incomparably ignorant, how could we
have tolerated the last eight years?
Frank Zappa
#47. The Silvertop and the Goldtop both had subtlety where it was needed but lots of definition as well. I liked the different voicings of the distortion/fuzz elements.
Dweezil Zappa
#48. When I was growing up, when I was 11 years old I was listening to The Mothers of Invention. You know, I mean I was a Frank Zappa fan in Arkansas.
Billy Bob Thornton
#49. People like Frank Zappa and Bryan Ferry knew we could pick and choose from the history of music, stick things together looking for friction and energy. They were more like playwrights; they invented characters and wrote a life around them.
Brian Eno
#50. Communism doesn't work because people like to own stuff.
Frank Zappa
#51. I'll take a drive to Beverly Hills
Just before dawn
An' knock the little jockeys
Off the rich people's lawn
An' before they get up
I'll be gone, I'll be gone
Before they get up
I'll be knocking the jockeys off the lawn
Frank Zappa
#52. Hey ugly folks, go get some cyanide and die.
Frank Zappa
#53. The NRA, with the fingers on the triggers when they kneel and pray.
Frank Zappa
#54. Modern music is people who can't think signing artists who can't write songs to make records for people who can't hear.
Frank Zappa
#56. Stuff up the cracks, turn on the gas, I'm gonna take my life.
Frank Zappa
#57. In every language, the first word after "Mama!" that every kid learns to say is "Mine!" A system that doesn't allow ownership, that doesn't allow you to say "Mine!" when you grow up, has
Frank Zappa
#58. Scientology , how about that? You hold on to the tin cans and then this guy asks you a bunch of questions, and if you pay enough money you get to join the master race. How's that for a religion ?
Frank Zappa
#59. The hardest and worst interview that I have ever done was with Frank Zappa.
Nina Blackwood
#61. Certainly Apple has improved enormously. At the beginning, the sampling rate was an issue for me, but a bigger argument was over digital rights, which I had.
Gail Zappa
#62. Kid's heads are filled with so many nonfacts that when they get out of school they're totally unprepared to do anything. They can't read, they can't write, they can't think. Talk about child abuse. The U.S. school system as a whole qualifies.
Frank Zappa
#63. This has to be the disease for you
Now scientists call this disease
Bromidrosis
But us regular folks
Who might wear tennis shoes
Or an occasional python boot
Know this exquisite little inconvenience
By the name of:
Stink Foot
Frank Zappa
#64. A true Zen saying: "Nothing is what I want.
Frank Zappa
#65. My father would often work all night and sleep during the day, so for us, dinner might be pancakes, and breakfast might be beef stroganoff.
Ahmet Zappa
#67. A drug is not bad. A drug is a chemical compound. The problem comes in when people who take drugs treat them like a license to behave like an asshole.
Frank Zappa
#69. In your dreams you can see yourself as a prophet saving the world.
Frank Zappa
#70. What kind of man can name a child Moon Unit?
Frank Zappa
#71. Drugs will turn you into your parents.
Frank Zappa
#73. If we can't be free at least we can be cheap.
Frank Zappa
#74. The price of meat has just gone up and your old lady has just gone down.
Frank Zappa
#75. I've always wanted to have a book published - it was a dream of mine, but the thought of actually writing a book made me feel really sick.
Ahmet Zappa
#76. I'm not going to be Bill Clinton and say I never inhaled. I did inhale. I liked tobacco a lot better.
Frank Zappa
#77. Well, Steve Vai joined my dad's band right around the time when I actually started playing guitar. So he gave me a couple of lessons on fundamentals, and gave me some scales and practice things to work on. But I pretty much learned everything by ear.
Dweezil Zappa
#78. I'm not black, but there's a whole lot of times I wish I could say I'm not white.
Frank Zappa
#79. My mother did literally hitchhike barefoot to the country store.
Moon Unit Zappa
#80. They tried to make me go to Catholic school, too. I lasted a very short time. When the penguin came after me with a ruler, I was out of there.
Frank Zappa
#82. Journalism is kind of scary and of it we should be wary.
Frank Zappa
#83. You is what you am, a cow don't make ham.
Frank Zappa
#84. Moving to Montana soon, gonna be a dental floss tycoon.
Frank Zappa
#85. Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe.
Frank Zappa
#86. Watch out where the Huskies go
And don't you eat that yellow snow
Frank Zappa
#87. Love of my life, I love you so. Love of my life, don't ever go.
Frank Zappa
#88. It's a despicable thing to share your personal inner torment for money.
Frank Zappa
#89. Am I a boy or a lady, I don't know which?
Frank Zappa
#90. On the average, I don't spend more than 15 minutes in the car - to go to the golf course or the gym. And that's the only time I listen to the radio.
Dweezil Zappa
#91. I think that if a person doesn't feel cynical then they're out of phase with the 20th century. Being cynical is the only way to deal with modern civilization - you can't just swallow it whole.
Frank Zappa
#92. The bigger the cushion, the better the pushin'.
Frank Zappa
#93. The most important thing in art is The Frame. For painting: literally; for other arts: figuratively
because, without this humble appliance, you can't know where The Art stops and The Real World begins. You have to put a 'box' around it because otherwise, what is that shit on the wall?
Frank Zappa
#94. There's a long tradition - certainly with country, but in all kinds of genres of music - to have humorous lyrics. Certainly with Frank Zappa and the Mothers of Invention and, if you look at country, Roger Miller and Jim Stafford.
Rick Moranis
#95. When God created Republicans, he gave up on everything else.
Frank Zappa
#96. Did you ever consider that LSD was really one of the most dangerous drugs ever manufactured because the people who took it turned into yuppies?
Frank Zappa
#97. Elvis has left the building to climb up that heavenly stair. So what if he looks like a wart-hog in heat?
Frank Zappa
#99. He likes to flirt with all the boys in the class.
Frank Zappa
#100. My English teacher, he's like, he's like Mr. Bu-fu.
Frank Zappa
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