Whoopee Quotes

#1. You can get tested now for early onset Alzheimer's. Hold on a second, could someone hire a marching band, cause I'm so happy I feel like having a parade. You mean I can find out early if I'm going to die of a super horrible disease that there's no cure for? Well, whoopee!

Arj Barker

#2. But me no buts, we're going to make whoopee, I tell you.

Blaise Cendrars

#3. Humor has a way of bringing people together. It unites people. In fact, I'm rather serious when I suggest that someone should plant a few whoopee cushions in the United Nations.

Ron Dentinger

#4. The connection between women's human rights, gender equality, socioeconomic development and peace is increasingly apparent.

Mahnaz Afkhami

#5. The world is wider in all directions, more dangerous and bitter, more extravagant and bright. We are making hay when we should be making whoopee; we are raising tomatoes when we should be raising Cain and Lazarus.

Annie Dillard

#6. The best Christmas trees come very close to exceeding nature. If some of our great decorated trees had been grown in a remote forest area with lights that came on every evening as it grew dark, the whole world would come to look at them and marvel at the mystery of their great beauty.

Andy Rooney

#7. Even the idea of a fart makes me laugh. Saying the word 'fart' makes me laugh. I have iFart on my phone. I have remote whoopee cushions. Farts. To me, there's nothing funnier.

George Clooney

#8. Paintings must be understood through the eyes, and that's not the word either. No writing, no talking, no singing, no dancing will explain them. They are the final, the nth whoopee of sight.

Charles Demuth

#9. There's something very soothing about the simplicity of doing what's right in front of you: paying the rent, buying groceries, and when there's a little extra for a treat like cinnamon rolls, whoopee! When you live paycheck to paycheck, you only have so much to lose.

Ali Liebegott

#10. When my children hear godliness out of my mouth and they see wickedness in my life, then I point them to heaven and I lead them to hell.

Alistair Begg

#11. Life is a whoopee cushion, a chair pulled away just as you were taking a seat.

Wally Lamb

#12. There's just something about making whoopee out under the stars that keeps a heart young, a mind sharp, and"
she leaned close to whisper in Meg's ear
"your coochie ready to do hoochie!

C.H. Admirand

#13. I come from the place of thinking, 'Whatever works for people' - and if you haven't been exposed to anything else, you really don't know better.

Rachael Harris

#14. God does not play games with His loyal servants", said the Metatron, but in a worried tone of voice.
"Whoopee", said Crowley.

Terry Pratchett

#15. A healthy person goes 'Yes,' 'No,' and 'Whoopee!' An unhealthy person goes 'Yes, but,' 'No, but,' and 'No whoopee.

Eric Berne

#16. I don't believe in you, God, but please, help me.

Paulo Coelho

#17. Kindness and humbleness are really good qualities to possess. But, if you have to use the word humble, it means you're not humble. And if you're not humble to this world, this world will thrust humbleness upon you.

Mike Tyson

#18. Aha! Today I shall become an author! And I will auth and auth and auth and make a squillion dollars, whoopee!

Brian Jacques

#19. In Boffo's Novelty and Joke Emporium in Ankh-Morpork, all the whoopee cushions trumpeted in a doleful harmony;

Terry Pratchett

#20. Evolution can go to hell as far as I am concerned. What a mistake we are. We have mortally wounded this sweet life-supporting planet - the only one in the whole Milky Way - with a century of transportation whoopee.

Kurt Vonnegut

#21. Diplomats willing to sit for an interview usually prefer the terra firma of CNN over the whoopee cushion of Comedy Central.

Kevin Bleyer

#22. If you get a little gassy, you've got to let it go. So people used to say to me, 'You're like a whoopee cushion.'

Whoopi Goldberg