Welcome Intern Quotes

#1. It just shows you that if you take a plain, ordinary, moronic intern and make him do the same things over and over again until he loses is mind, you can teach him to do almost anything. I think now that I've mastered IVs, I might take up neurosurgery in my spare time.

Robert Marion

#2. I'm happy to report that 'The New Press' is still in business to this day. But not thanks to me. I was a really bad publishing intern.

Lev Grossman

#3. An editor sleeping with his writer was not as bad as a psychoanalyst sleeping with his patient, or even a professor sleeping with an undergraduate, let alone a president with an intern.

Edward St. Aubyn

#4. Anne Marie Smith flew to Washington to tell prosecutors about Gary Condit's attempt to get her to deny their affair. It looks bad. If it's found he lied about the intern and the mistresses, he could get 4-8 years in the White House.

Argus Hamilton

#5. So it was sort of an odd time because I had been hired, but my paperwork hadn't gone through. So I worked as an intern during the government shutdown, as an intern, but I already had a job.

Monica Lewinsky

#6. When I was in college, I wanted to write for 'Late Night With Conan O'Brien,' and I was an intern there.

Mike Birbiglia

#7. Know that she was a good and hardworking intern, and that she died doing what she loved: simultaneously living and dying in infinite, fractal defiance of linear time.

Joseph Fink

#8. Having an affair with an intern is just an incredibly stupid thing to do.

Bradley Whitford

#9. When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You know that your name is safe in their mouth. - Jess C. Scott, The Intern

Linda Kage

#10. He'd gotten a botany internship thinking that he could use it to grow illicit, untaxed marijuana only to discover that every third botany intern had come in with the same plan.

James S.A. Corey

#11. So, like the knights of old, I suited up in my trusty intern armor - brownish-green suit, sensible cap-toed oxfords, white button-down, and omnipresent LensCrafters glasses. If I wasn't able to shoot her, I could probably bore her to death.

Shane Kuhn

#12. I'm actually going in to ER as the new British intern.

Parminder Nagra

#13. I mean, they're threatening - my career is over. You know, everything I've worked so hard. I've worked extremely hard since about 17 years old, you know, as a White House intern on up.

Andrea Mackris

#14. Intern needed: Must be 21 with 30 years of experience.

Unknown

#15. I got out of college and I went to get my master's in creative writing at San Francisco State. I was working as an actor at the Actor's Workshop, being abused as a intern.

Peter Coyote

#16. Compared to Clinton, I feel like a loser. I can't even get the intern to make me coffee!

David Letterman

#17. Wait - something's gumming up Bosch. (Computers aren't as powerful as most people think; running even a small and rather stupid intern can really bog down a server.)

Charles Stross

#18. His vital signs were taken, an electrocardiogram ... which revealed occasional ventricular premature contractions. An intern took his history ... and then he was promptly ... simply ... forgotten to death.

Paddy Chayefsky

#19. It is an intern's job to go for coffee for anyone who asks, preferably delivering it scalding hot and cupped in your bare hands!

Kurt Braunohler

#20. When I was a 21-year-old intern at CBS, I was told I had crossed eyes and shouldn't try to be on air. That's when I decided I was going to be behind the scenes.

Andy Cohen

#21. And to improve access to the UK publishing industry - I'm hoping to set up an internship or work experience for someone from a low-income background, as soon as we have the funds. While we don't have the funds, we won't have an intern.

Deborah Smith

#22. By the end of my first week as an intern, I am just about ready to throw my pager out the window. A high window. Overlooking a trash compactor. Filled with highly corrosive acid.

Michelle Au

#23. I've been in love with Washington ever since renting my very first apartment there many years ago while working as a Senate intern.

Danny Meyer

#24. Hillary Clinton's 506-page memoir has come out. So much of her personality shines through, that in the end, you, too, will want to sleep with an intern.

Craig Kilborn

#25. My first day as an intern in the books department at 'Cosmopolitan' also happened to be the day the O.J. Simpson verdict was announced.

John Searles

#26. I was also encountering CEOs who felt that their grip on social media was under control because they had an intern managing a Twitter feed. And I disagreed.

Jennifer Janson

#27. I missed having her as my intern. I missed bossing her around. I really missed her bossing me around in return.

Christina Lauren

#28. Will Sumner was Jensen's college best friend, Dad's former intern, and the object of every one of my teenage fantasies.

Christina Lauren

#29. In 1984, Nevada Senator Paul Laxalt gave me the opportunity of a lifetime to serve as a legislative intern in his office in Washington, D.C. Coming from humble beginnings, the experience changed my life and charted me on a path of public service.

Brian Sandoval

#30. As a Facebook summer intern once told me, In my school's computer science department, there are more Daves than girls.

Sheryl Sandberg