Top 100 Warren Farrell Quotes
#1. People who succeed do not expect every company to reward fairly; they screen for companies that will recognize their contribution," wrote Warren Farrell, Ph.D. in The Myth of Male Power.2
Suzanne Venker
#2. A lot of young men are frustrated and looking for someone to blame.
Warren Farrell
#3. We take men's obligation to earn money, and when they do it well, we blame them for having power and being oppressors. And when they don't do it all, women just don't marry men who are reading 'I'm Okay, You're Okay' in the unemployment line.
Warren Farrell
#4. Is there discrimination against women? Yes. There's no denying that the old boys' network is alive and well. But there's also discrimination against men.
Warren Farrell
#5. Throughout my life I have always been amazed that people couldn't listen to other people, that they couldn't hear their best intent, that there seemed to be an enormous need to demonize.
Warren Farrell
#6. Men are fair, and they have learned not to personalize anger - they can disagree with you and argue to the bone, but afterward they still consider you a nice person with whom the underlying human relationship need not be altered.
Warren Farrell
#7. Only when a woman shares male risks can she really begin to understand men.
Warren Farrell
#8. When we suggest that men are at the top because men discriminate, we miss the point. Men are at the top of the work hierarchy because work has been primarily men's responsibility.
Warren Farrell
#9. Men rarely worry about using or being used because all relationships work that way. A man perceives himself as owning and being owned by a woman. 'Use' is a dirty word only when there's an imbalance in the relationship.
Warren Farrell
#10. Sexual harassment legislation in its present form makes all men unequal to all women.
Warren Farrell
#11. In 1969, nationwide, female professors who had never been married and never published earned 145% of their counterpart male colleagues.
Warren Farrell
#12. The Myth of Male Power dealt much more with the political issues, the legal issues, sexual harassment, date rape, women who kill, and those issues were very much more interfaced with the agendas of feminism.
Warren Farrell
#13. If my parents had made love a tenth of a second earlier or later, I wouldn't exist. What an enormous miracle, just being given life.
Warren Farrell
#14. The only men who aren't in fear of women's reactions are usually men who aren't born or who are dead.
Warren Farrell
#15. But when feminists suggest that God might be a She without suggesting that the Devil might also be female, they must be opposed.
Warren Farrell
#17. In the past quarter century, we exposed biases against other races and called it racism, and we exposed biases against women and called it sexism. Biases against men we call humor.
Warren Farrell
#18. Circumcision in the United States is routinely performed without anesthesia, though anesthesia reduces the infant's stress and prevents infection and blood clots.
Warren Farrell
#19. Sexual harassment in the workplace confuses rewards for performance with rewards for attractiveness and sexual availability.
Warren Farrell
#20. Now, since I'm a husband and father, discrimination against women isn't just political, it's personal.
Warren Farrell
#21. My wife's income allowed me to do what I really loved. I realized that women's liberation is men's liberation, too.
Warren Farrell
#22. Male makeup is men's titles, status and paying for dates. Makeup is what both sexes use to bridge the gap between the power they have and the power they'd like to have. Both male and female makeup are compensations for feelings of powerlessness.
Warren Farrell
#23. For me, the massiveness of what I don't know is one way I experience God. It creates in me a feeling of humility and a sense of gratitude.
Warren Farrell
#24. When we hear men are the greater victims of crime, we tend to say, 'Well, it's men hurting other men.' When we hear that blacks are the greater victims, we consider it racist to say, 'Well, it's blacks hurting blacks.' The victim is a victim no matter who the perpetrator was.
Warren Farrell
#25. Men don't oppress women any more than women oppress men.
Warren Farrell
#26. To me, God is the accumulated wisdom I've gathered throughout my life. When I pay attention, my body gives me a printout of this wisdom.
Warren Farrell
#27. Our focus on discrimination against women during the past 30 years has blinded us to opportunities for women.
Warren Farrell
#28. Options allow a woman to tailor her role to her personality, but if a man expects to provide well, he expects to wear a suit, not to wear what suits him.
Warren Farrell
#29. I would suggest that just as women who make it in the world of business need male business mentors, perhaps men who make it in the world of emotions will need female emotional mentors.
Warren Farrell
#30. In brief, our genetic heritage is at odds with our genetic future. For the first time in human history, the qualities it takes to survive as a species are compatible with the qualities it takes to love.
Warren Farrell
#31. Unless a woman asks men out (the first time) as often as men ask her out, then the assertion He asked me out, therefore he pays is just a double jeopardy of the male role: he must not only do the asking, he must pay extra for risking extra rejection.
Warren Farrell
#32. Virtually every society that survived did so by socializing its sons to be disposable. Disposable in war; disposable in work. We need warriors and volunteer firefighters, so we label these men heroes.
Warren Farrell
#33. Many black men leave because they are financially responsible
not because they are emotionally irresponsible.
Warren Farrell
#35. A 2001 survey of business owners with MBAs conducted by the Rochester Institute of Technology found that money was the primary motivator for only 29% of women, versus 76% of men. Women prioritized flexibility, fulfillment, autonomy and safety.
Warren Farrell
#36. Those who call me an opportunist are following the old rule: If you can't attack the data, attack the person.
Warren Farrell
#37. I don't have children that I've lost in a bitter custody dispute. But I see an enormous wound in kids due to a lack of their dads.
Warren Farrell
#38. When a parent denies a child its parent time, that parent is denying the child its child support
its psychological child support.
Warren Farrell
#39. Until recently, the question was 'Why can't a woman be more like a man?' It should have been changed to 'Why can't both sexes be more like the best parts of each other?' Instead, the pendulum swung to the 1960s feminist lapel button Adam Was a First Draft. True enough. So are we all.
Warren Farrell
#40. Men have the influence and power in business and politics. It is the mother who can make the child's bedtime earlier, take away desserts or ground the child.
Warren Farrell
#41. When a man is able to connect with his feelings, he is able to care more.
Warren Farrell
#42. Irony: While we increasingly hold people more responsible if they drink and drive, we hold women less responsible if they drink and have sex.
Warren Farrell
#43. The legal bias for special protection for women has begun to wreak havoc with the Constitution's guarantee of equal protection.
Warren Farrell
#44. The more the father is involved, the more easily the child makes open, receptive, and trusting contact with new people in its life.
Warren Farrell
#45. Letting men die is a money-saving device. Safety costs money as one safety official put it, 'When everything is hurry, hurry, hurry, when you start pressuring people and taking shortcuts, things can go wrong. And then people die.' No. And then men die.
Warren Farrell
#46. Women-in-jeopardy movies are, in essence, the updated versions of men dying to save the princess from the dragon to earn her love. They are modern-day training films for teaching women to select the best protectors while weeding out the rest.
Warren Farrell
#47. So we've moved from an era when women's biology was women's destiny to today, which is an era in which men's biology is men's destiny.
Warren Farrell
#48. In America and in most of the industrialized world, men are coming to be thought of by feminists in very much the same way that Jews were thought of by early Nazis. The comparison is overwhelmingly scary.
Warren Farrell
#49. For the first time in human history the psychology that is a prerequisite for intimacy has become the psychology that is a prerequisite for species survival.
Warren Farrell
#50. Men are likely to be quite generous, especially financially.
Warren Farrell
#51. In brief, when a man fails as a wallet, we put him in prison; when a woman fails as a mother, we offer her social services. We're taking a criminal approach to men, a social services approach to women.
Warren Farrell
#52. When only men could register to vote, we required only men to register for the draft. Today both sexes can vote, but only men must register for the draft.
Warren Farrell
#53. When women are at the height of their beauty power and exercise it, we call it marriage. When men are at the height of their success power and exercise it, we call it a mid-life crisis.
Warren Farrell
#54. Men may be way behind in creating choices for themselves, but have actually been quiet supporters of the choices women want for themselves.
Warren Farrell
#55. Sexism is discounting the female experience of powerlessness; the new sexism is discounting the male experience of powerlessness.
Warren Farrell
#56. One can make a case that says that since 85% of children being brought up in single family homes are being brought up by women that about 85% of elementary school teachers should be males to balance out the feminization that the boys and girls receive.
Warren Farrell
#58. Sometimes I have a feeling, when I look back on my life, that all I've been through has prepared me perfectly for just what I'm doing now.
Warren Farrell
#59. No movement calls [migrant workers] oppressed for providing money for women from whom they are receiving neither cooking nor cleaning; for providing their wives with homes while they sleep on the ground.
Warren Farrell
#60. Women's genetic celebrity power magnifies men's protector instinct. It inspires the government-as-substitute-husband. Men's addiction to the genetic celebrity is either invisible or in the denial stage thus we either don't see it, or when confronted, deny it.
Warren Farrell
#61. Together, we came to understand how we beg men to express feelings, but then when men do express feelings, we call it sexism, male chauvinism, or backlash.
Warren Farrell
#62. Women are the only 'oppressed' group that is able to buy most of the $10 billion worth of cosmetics each year; the only oppressed group that spends more on high fashion, brand-name clothing than its oppressors; the only oppressed group that watches more TV.
Warren Farrell
#63. Men are often a lot less vindictive than women are, because we are rejected constantly every day.
Warren Farrell
#64. Programs like WIC (Women, Infants, and Children) subsidize the exclusion of dads.
Warren Farrell
#65. And with the rape, I was showing why the rape statistics are exaggerated, and saying that date rape was much more complex than the way feminists had portrayed it, as men oppressing women.
Warren Farrell
#66. A man's primary fantasy is access to a variety of attractive women without the fear of rejection.
Warren Farrell
#67. Just as women needed the help of the law to enter the workplace in the 20th century, men will need the help of the law to love their children in the 21st century.
Warren Farrell
#68. He and she become selective at different points; she can be selective when he wants his primary fantasy - sex; he can be selective when she wants her primary fantasy - commitment.
Warren Farrell
#69. In the past we believed both sexes were born with original sin. Today, we have come to unconsciously believe in the original sin of boys, but the original innocence of girls.
Warren Farrell
#70. It is important for a father who feels pushed away [by the mom] to say, in effect, When you do that, I feel unwanted as a father, or I feel my rough-housing is not bad parenting; it's my contribution to helping our child take risks. Women cannot hear what men do not say.
Warren Farrell
#71. The government passed more laws to protect women from dirty jokes than to protect men from death by faulty rafters at a construction site.
Warren Farrell
#72. We have been suckered into believing that, because there are more men at the top than women at the top, that this is a result of discrimination against women. That's been the misconception. It's all about trade-offs. You earn more money, you usually sacrifice something at home.
Warren Farrell
#73. If we hold the married man accountable for finances gone legally awry, then the married woman should be held accountable for children who go awry.
Warren Farrell
#74. Sexual harassment legislation feels unfair to men because if they sued over an ethnic joke, or over a woman discussing pornography or asking them out, they'd be laughed out of the company.
Warren Farrell
#75. Employers are NOT prohibited from practicing sex discrimination in hiring and promoting employees.
Warren Farrell
#76. Hazing is both testing and training to subordinate self to the team.
Warren Farrell
#77. Women attempt suicide more often because they want to become the priority of those they love rather than always prioritizing them.
Warren Farrell
#78. The weakness of men is the facade of strength; the strength of women is the facade of weakness.
Warren Farrell
#79. Solutions: ( ... ) Seek an understanding of the other sex's best intent.
Warren Farrell
#80. I started to get very well recognized in the early seventies as the only man in the United States who had been elected three times to the board of NOW in New York City.
Warren Farrell
#81. A person working 45 hours per week averages 44% more income than someone working 40 hours per week. That's 44% more income for 13% more time.
Warren Farrell
#82. After a divorce, men's biggest fear is, typically, losing their children (women's is poverty).
Warren Farrell
#83. Men give the same lines to different women for the same reason women wear the same perfume for different men; we all try the things that work.
Warren Farrell
#84. Men's greatest weakness is their facade of strength, and women's greatest strength is their facade of weakness.
Warren Farrell
#85. The average full-time working male works more than a full-time working female.
Warren Farrell
#87. When men in relationships have more money, we say they have the power. When women in relationships have more money, we say they are being used.
Warren Farrell
#88. [With respect to child custody] a woman has no right to a unilateral choice that affects the rest of a man's life any more than a man would have the right to a unilateral choice that affects the rest of a woman's life.
Warren Farrell
#89. I define power as 'control over one's life.' A balanced life is far superior to the male definition of power: earning money someone else spends while he dies sooner.
Warren Farrell
#90. [H]umans tend to start the process of change by acknowledging themselves thus blacks asserted black pride and black is beautiful; women declared I am woman, I am strong:;; men are saying I am man, I am okay. After a quarter of a century of male bashing, that's not a bad start.
Warren Farrell
#91. The rules of sexism do not free men from the terror of violence; they only keep men from complaining about it.
Warren Farrell
#92. Perhaps the most prevailing expectation of men is our Superman expectation: the fear we are merely Clark Kents who won't be accepted unless we are a Superman.
Warren Farrell
#93. Male bashing is everywhere. It would be a mistake to view the current situation as another skirmish in the war between the sexes. Women have been doing the shooting, and men have been burying their heads in the sand, hoping the bullets will miss.
Warren Farrell
#94. I've always been motivated to stop people from doing dysfunctional things.
Warren Farrell
#95. I've gone from being quite wealthy, when I was defending women, to being quite poor defending men.
Warren Farrell
#96. By the 1970s, the American woman was being called 'liberated' or 'superwoman' while the American man was being called 'baby killer' if he fought in Vietnam, 'traitor' if he protested, or 'apathetic' if he did neither. Even men who came home paraplegics were literally spit on.
Warren Farrell
#97. When we commit violence against an infant girl, we call it child abuse; when we commit violence against an infant boy, we call it circumcision.
Warren Farrell
#98. Financial analysts make a lot more than accountants.
Warren Farrell
#99. Boys with a 'failure to launch' are invisible to most girls. With poor social skills, the boys feel anger at their fear of being rejected and self-loathing at their inability to compete.
Warren Farrell
#100. Men are not only women's unpaid bodyguards, they actually pay to be a woman's bodyguard.
Warren Farrell
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