Victor Lawson Quotes

#1. Love does not come on schedule or on time. It comes unexpected, it comes unplanned. Do not shut your doors on love just because you've been hurt before. Let go of the need to be loved. Just be loving. Others will be able to see how loving and lovable you are when you express it

Rita Zahara

#2. Victor claims these kinds of things don't go on in normal households, but I'm pretty sure this entire incident could be blamed on the fact that I have several real-life sleep disorders. This is not too surprising considering I collect neurological disorders like other people collect comic books.

Jenny Lawson

#3. You have teenagers thinking they're going to make millions as NBA stars when that's not realistic for even 1 percent of them. Becoming a scientist or engineer is.

Dean Kamen

#4. Victor kept telling me to breathe, and I told him that I already knew how to breathe and why do people even say that because it's not like people just forget to breathe. He

Jenny Lawson

#5. I don't miss anything about the 1960s, not really. I did it. It's like asking, 'Do you miss the fourth grade?' I loved the fourth grade when I was in it, but I don't want to do it again.

Grace Slick

#6. Dear Victor: This bath towel was wet and you left it on the floor and it was the last clean one in the house. I'm pretty sure this is how tuberculosis is spread. I'm writing all this in my blog in case I end up dead because of your carelessness.

Jenny Lawson

#7. Last month, as Victor drove me home so I could rest, I told him that sometimes I felt like his life would be easier without me. He paused a moment in thought and then said, It might be easier. But it wouldn't be better.

Jenny Lawson

#8. You cannot learn about Love, LOVE appears on the wings of grace.

Rumi

#9. Then I realized that Victor and Maury were staring at me and that they'd asked me a question about the will but I couldn't remember what it was so I just said, When I die I'd like all my stuff to be left to my cat.

Jenny Lawson

#10. Lady, you have the wrong number. Our cat isn't even in the hospital. He doesn't want pajamas.

Jenny Lawson

#11. Steve Lawson is a brilliant musician. I've known about him and listened to him for many years. He may not be one of the most famous bassists but he is definitely one of the most talented.

Victor Wooten

#12. Sometimes I'd hide him under the covers (Rory, not the mailman) so that when Victor turned down the bed there was Rory on his pillow, as if to say, SURPRISE, MOTHERFUCKER! THERE'S A DEAD RACCOON IN YOUR BED AND HE WANTS SOME SNUGGLIN'.

Jenny Lawson

#13. Unfortunately, that was not my father's intent at all, and my eyes widened in horror as my father leaned over and yelled in his booming, cheerful voice, "HELLOOOO, VICTOR," while tossing a live bobcat on him. Most

Jenny Lawson

#14. "My obit is going to be full of Bogart, I'm sure," she says, adding, "I'll never know if that's true. If that's the way it is, that's the way it is."

Lauren Bacall

#15. You expect me to believe that you're being held against your will?" I raised a skeptical eyebrow. "You're roaming around the castle freely."
"As are you." He turned away from me then. "Not all prisons have bars. You should know that better than anyone, Princess.

Amanda Hocking

#16. Did they teach you how to pronounce 'Avada Kedavra' when you bought it?" I ask. Victor just stares at me. Probably because he's never read any of the Harry Potter books.

Jenny Lawson

#17. YOU are using a frisbee as a plate."
"Uh, what? I'm not using a
oh hang on, this is a frisbee. Weird."
Victor glared at me.
"Dude, calm down, I'll wash it afterward. It's probably dishwasher safe.

Jenny Lawson

#18. Them-and-us-attitude

Haruki Murakami

#19. Dear Victor: I've poisoned something in the fridge. Good luck with that.

Jenny Lawson

#20. As always when we bought a new home, Victor asked the questions about deed restrictions and taxes, while I asked the two questions I was always responsible for: "Has anyone ever died in the house?" and "How many bodies are buried on the property?

Jenny Lawson