Uncyclopedia Corn Quotes

#1. Coach Hedge grunted like he was pleased to have an excuse. He unclipped the megaphone from his belt and continued giving directions, but his voice came out like Darth Vader's. The kids cracked up. The coach tried again, but this time the megaphone blared: The cow says moo!

Rick Riordan

#2. How to Overthrow the System: brew your own beer; kick in your Tee Vee; kill your own beef; build your own cabin and piss off the front porch whenever you bloody well feel like it.

Edward Abbey

#3. We can not wait until we have enough trained people willing to work at a teacher's salary and under conditions imposed upon teachers in order to improve what happens in the classroom.

Major Owens

#4. Uncle Remus, who said to Uncle Ben, You're a credit to your rice. Never got a dinner!

Red Buttons

#5. You can know an animal - or a person, for that matter - in an instant, really, though your understanding can go on unfolding for years.

Mark Doty