Superstore Quotes

#1. After using a paint chart from a local DIY superstore to identify the skin tone of his penis as midnight chocolate, Miriam stayed down on one knee and offered him the citizenship he had always wanted and the middle-aged white woman he would grudgingly accept.

David F. Porteous

#2. And now, the Superstore - unequaled in size, unmatched in variety, unrivaled inconvenience.

Dave Barry

#3. Music-hall songs provide the dull with wit, just as proverbs provide them with wisdom.

W. Somerset Maugham

#4. Boredom is my worst enemy. It's killed a lot of my friends, but it won't get me. When I get bored, I go risk my life somewhere.

Larry Niven

#5. You can't legitimately kick on income tax, for it's on what you have made. You have already made it. But, look at land, farms, homes, stores, vacant lots. You pay year after year on them whether you make it or not.

Will Rogers

#6. Hillary Clinton was actually inducted into the Irish American Hall of Fame yesterday. Hillary said she's very proud of her Irish heritage or her Italian heritage or her Asian heritage. Whatever it takes to seal the deal with you guys. I've got to get into that Oval Office.

Jimmy Fallon

#7. I used to be psychic, but I drank my way out of it.

Mark E. Smith

#8. I should stop expecting so much.

Ishida Mitsunari

#9. Tea? Good God, no. It's mud. How the British ever built an empire drinking the filthy stuff is beyond me. And if we carry on drinking it, I've no doubt that the empire won't last much longer. No, a civilized person drinks coffee.

Charlie Higson

#10. But not princess-y in a prissy way. No, I would be a total badass, with a long black leather coat and a diamond scepter that doubles as a weapon. Yeah, a weapon!

Rick Riordan

#11. Waiting to be hired, as an actor, especially, is soul-destroying ... There is always something you can do ... Create something, a play reading ... Anything. But don't rely on other people to come to you. Put yourself out there.

Deirdre O'Kane

#12. I say we should stake him to an anthill and throw little pickles at him! (Selena)

Sherrilyn Kenyon

#13. I think suspense should be like any other color on a writer's palette. I suppose I'm in the minority but I think it's crazy for 'literary fiction' to divorce itself from stories that are suspenseful, and assign anything with cops or spies or criminals to some genre ghetto.

Jess Walter

#14. Show business is like Champagne. You'll appreciate it more if you don't drink it everyday

Jay Leno

#15. In the city, nudity means something; in the wild, it just exists.

Mason Cooley