Top 100 Snicket Quotes
#1. Get scared later, and if you're scared now remember what Kit always said. If you're not scared, she told me, it's not bravery. And you want to be brave, don't you, Snicket?
Lemony Snicket
#2. I was so grateful that Lemony Snicket wasn't the worst movie ever made that I overlooked many things that might have otherwise upset me.
Daniel Handler
#3. Boredom is not black licorice, Snicket," she said. "There's no reason to share it with me.
Lemony Snicket
#5. Reader: Dear Mr. Snicket, What is the best way to keep a secret? Lemony Snicket : Tell it to everyone you know, but pretend you are kidding.
Lemony Snicket
#6. Don't talk, Snicket," Theodora said. "Fools talk while wise people listen, so listen up and I'll tell you how we will solve this case sensibly and properly.
Lemony Snicket
#7. The more I protest that I'm not Lemony Snicket, and that I'm Daniel Handler instead, the more it becomes clear to the audience that I am in fact Lemony Snicket, that I am in fact standing in front of them.
Daniel Handler
#8. I often can't remember which scenes are and aren't in the final product, because I saw so many different versions of the Lemony Snicket that I forget which ended up on the cutting-room floor.
Daniel Handler
#9. The map is not the territory," Snicket's chaperon advises him. "That's an expression which means the world does not match the picture in our heads.
Lemony Snicket
#10. I was once almost forced off the stage at a large chain bookstore that shall remain nameless, because she introduced me as Lemony Snicket, and I immediately interrupted her and said, "Oh no, Lemony Snicket isn't here," and then she tried to cancel the event right then and there.
Daniel Handler
#11. That a story in The Daily Punctilio was completely true, and to show this article to so many volunteers, including the Baudelaire parents, the Snicket siblings, and the woman I happened to love.
Lemony Snicket
#12. It is a miracle if we can find true friends, and it is a miracle if you have enough food to eat, and it is a miracle if you get to spend your days and evenings doing whatever it is you like to do ... Lemony Snicket, The Lump of Coal
Shirley A. Moore
#13. In the 1970s and 1980s there was so little decent fiction for young people, but we're now in a golden age that shows no sign of fading. Philip Pullman, J. K. Rowling, Lemony Snicket are only three of the best known among a good number of equals.
David Mitchell
#14. 'James and the Giant Peach' magnificently starts out Dahl's career as a blithe and droll Bad Uncle corrupter and affirmer of youth. Its influence can be subsequently traced down the decades in everything from Maurice Sendak to Lemony Snicket to J. K. Rowling.
Paul Di Filippo
#15. Tea should be as bitter as wormwod and as sharp as a two eged sword
Kit Snicket (a series of unfortunate events)
Lemony Snicket
#16. I'm not smart, Snicket. I don't ask the right questions and I never find the right answers.
Lemony Snicket
#17. It's cold outside, Mr. Snicket.'
'So I'll shiver,' I said. 'I've shivered before.'
She looked down at the table and traced her father's name with her black fingernail. 'So have I,' she said.
Lemony Snicket
#18. It is not always the job of people shouting outside impressive buildings to solve problems. It is often the job of the people inside, who have paper, pens, desks, and an impressive view.
Lemony Snicket
#19. Klaus had not told his siblings about the book, because he didn't want to give them false hope.
Lemony Snicket
#20. Baudelaires had visited the office of Vice Principal Nero and learned about all of the academy's strict and unfair rules. When they worked
Lemony Snicket
#21. The sky was dark blue twilight, pretty to look at but lonely to walk under.
Lemony Snicket
#22. but Phil looked up and gave them a weak smile. "Well," he said, "this isn't too bad. My left leg is broken, but at least I'm right-legged. That's pretty fortunate." "Gee," one of the other employees murmured. "I thought he'd say something more along the lines of 'Aaaaah! My leg! My leg!
Lemony Snicket
#23. A wonderful laugh is no excuse for villainous behavior!
Lemony Snicket
#24. The dumplings had the flavor of paradise, and the broth spread through my veins like a secret that's fun to keep.
Lemony Snicket
#25. You're just jealous of me because I'm a tap-dancing ballerina fairy princess veterinarian!
Lemony Snicket
#26. Klaus, and Sunny had been many, many times to Mr. Poe's office at the bank, where he coughed and talked on the phone and made decisions
Lemony Snicket
#28. It has been said that the hardest job in the world is raising a child, but the people who says this have probably never worked at a comb factory or captured pirates on the high seas.
Lemony Snicket
#29. Having an aura of menace is like having a pet weasel, because you rarely meet someone who has one, and when you do, it makes you want to hide under the coffee table.
Lemony Snicket
#30. The next name on the list is Ed Valiantbrue, which doesn't have an O in it anyway."
"O!" Sunny shrieked.
"O!" Klaus agreed.
"O!" Sunny insisted.
"Oh!" Klaus cried. "I see what you mean! If it doesn't have am O in it, it can't be an anagram of Violet Baudelaire.
Lemony Snicket
#31. ...It is one of the strange truths of life that practically nobody likes to be stared at and that practically nobody can stop themselves from staring....
Lemony Snicket
#32. It is one of the peculiar truths of life that people often say things that they know full well are ridiculous.
Lemony Snicket
#33. Ceviche is an acquired taste, a phrase which here means something you don't like the first few times you eat it ...
Lemony Snicket
#34. Who you are and what you read is private in a library.
Lemony Snicket
#35. The word "dreadful," even when used three times in a row, did not seem like a dreadful enough word to describe everything that had happened.
Lemony Snicket
#36. Having a personal philosophy is like having a pet marmoset, because it may be very attractive when you acquire it, but there may be situations when it will not come in handy at all.
Lemony Snicket
#37. They can teach you anything. That doesn't mean you learn it. It doesn't mean you believe it.
Lemony Snicket
#38. When the town aches,
the Swinster Pharmacy aches with it.
Lemony Snicket
#39. It is difficult, when faced with a situation you cannot control, to admit you can do nothing.
Lemony Snicket
#40. Are you ready?" Klaus asked finally.
"No," Sunny answered.
"Me neither," Violet said, "but if we wait until we're ready we'll be waiting for the rest of our lives, Let's go.
Lemony Snicket
#41. But happy moments came rarely and unexpectedly in the Baudelaires' lives, and the three siblings had learned to accept them.
Lemony Snicket
#42. You might think that climbing a mountain is half the battle, only to find out that the mountain goats who live at the top are vicious, and heavily armed.
Lemony Snicket
#43. Depressed is a word that often describes somebody who is feeling sad and gloomy, but in this case it describes a secret button, hidden in a crow statue, that is feeling just fine, thank you.
Lemony Snicket
#44. One could say, in fact, that no story really has a beginning, and that no story really has an end
Lemony Snicket
#46. But sometimes it takes only a photograph and a sentence to make an author cry himself to sleep even years after the photograph was taken.
Lemony Snicket
#47. Being curious is the most important part of being a journalist. It might be the most important part of being anything.
Lemony Snicket
#48. It's bitten her!' he cried. 'It's Bitten her! It's bitten her! Calm down! Get moving! Call an ambulance! Call the police! Call a scientist! Call my wife! This is terrible! This is awful! This is ghastly! This is phantasmagorical! This is-
Lemony Snicket
#49. Crying is the opposite of scolding, because adults are hardly ever allowed to do it.
Lemony Snicket
#50. It is true there are more important things than dinner, but it is difficult to keep those things in mind when you haven't had dinner.
Lemony Snicket
#51. Announcing your death should be like announcing that you are a lunar moth: It must be done quietly or it will not be believed.
Lemony Snicket
#53. I'll tell you why I'm Shirley," Count Olaf said. "I'm Shirley because I would like to be called Shirley, and it is impolite not to do so.
Lemony Snicket
#54. An Overall Feeling of Doom that One Cannot Ever Escape no Matter What One Does
Lemony Snicket
#55. Imagining the worst doesn't keep it from happening
Lemony Snicket
#56. You don't spend your life hanging around books without learning a thing or two.
Lemony Snicket
#57. everything being fine is only one of many, many reasons why someone may not contact you. Perhaps they are tied up. Maybe they are surrounded by fierce weasels, or perhaps they are wedged tightly between two refrigerators and cannot get themselves out.
Lemony Snicket
#58. For some stories, it's easy. The moral of 'The Three Bears,' for instance, is Never break into someone else's house.' The moral of 'Snow White' is 'Never eat apples.' The moral of World War I is 'Never assassinate Archduke Ferdinand.
Lemony Snicket
#59. Aha!"
My chaperone looked at me like I should aha! back, but all I could manage was a quiet "ah." I made a note to ha later.
Lemony Snicket
#60. You're noble enough, Baudelaires. That's all we can ask for in this world.
Lemony Snicket
#61. Why does anyone have a lot of rules? So they can boss people around, I guess.
Lemony Snicket
#62. But there are many things in life that become different if you take a long look at them
Lemony Snicket
#63. Klaus grinned. 'I'm sorry,' he said, 'but it was a very interesting book, and I'm so pleased that it's coming in handy.
Lemony Snicket
#64. It is the things that have a history, L. Compared to them we are ghosts.
Lemony Snicket
#65. Don't be absurd!" Jerome said. "Ruthless kidnapping villains aren't in!
Lemony Snicket
#66. They were almond cookies, although they could have been made of spinach and shoes for all I cared. I ate eleven of them, right in a row. It is rude to take the last cookie.
Lemony Snicket
#67. Nevermore Tree was gargantuan, a word which here means 'having attained an inordinate amount of botanical volume.
Lemony Snicket
#68. And all of it was dark. I could see tall shelves, and a few windows covered in thick shades that hid the starlight. In the middle of the room was a circular table with shadows gathered around it. "Who wrote The Wind in the Willows?" asked
Lemony Snicket
#69. The siblings wished that if Mr. Poe were really jealous of them he would attend Prufrock Preparatory School himself, and they could work at the bank.
Lemony Snicket
#70. We might even say that the world is always in medias res - a Latin phrase which means "in the midst of things" or "in the middle of a narrative" - and that it is impossible to solve any mystery, or find the root of any trouble,
Lemony Snicket
#72. There are many, many types of books in the world, which makes good sense, because there are many, many types of people, and everybody wants to read something different.
Lemony Snicket
#73. Never trust anyone who has not brought a book with them.
Lemony Snicket
#74. Never, under any circumstances, let the Virginian wolfsnake near a typewriter.
Lemony Snicket
#75. Aunt Josephine had been so careful to avoid anything that she thought might harm her, but harm had still come her way.
Lemony Snicket
#76. It is unwise to make something permanent when the whole world is shifting. There may be a time when this symbol means something treacherous and terrible, rather than something noble and literate.
Lemony Snicket
#77. It looked exhausting and pointless, two things that should be avoided at all costs
Lemony Snicket
#78. This feeling is not unlike the sinking in one's stomach when one is in an elevator that suddenly goes down, or when you are snug in your bed and your closet door suddenly creaks open to reveal the person who has been hiding there.
Lemony Snicket
#79. Asinine is a word that sounds like you shouldn't say it, so when you do say it, people often gasp. This makes it a delicious way of saying 'not very smart,' which is all it means.
Lemony Snicket
#80. But if they were afraid of lemon meringue pie, this would be an irrational fear, because lemon meringue pie is delicious and has never hurt a soul.
Lemony Snicket
#81. Like an envelope, a hollow figurine, and a coffin, a refrigerator can hold all sorts of things, and they may turn out to be very important depending on what kind of day you are having.
Lemony Snicket
#82. Perhaps if we saw what was ahead of us, and glimpsed the follies, and misfortunes that would befall us later on, we would all stay in our mother's wombs, and then there would be nobody in the world but a great number of very fat, very irritated women.
Lemony Snicket
#83. Even the most ridiculous of stories can contain a grain of truth.
Lemony Snicket
#85. Sunny did not reply, but her siblings were not alarmed because they imagined it was difficult to say much when you had a mouthful of wall.
Lemony Snicket
#86. The manager frowned, as if the middle Baudelaire had given him the wrong answer.
That's the rooftop bathing salon," he said. "People who sunbathe aren't usually interested in library science, so they're not picky about the salon's location. Now get moving!
Lemony Snicket
#87. Writing is a dying form. One reads of this every day.
Lemony Snicket
#88. Stop!" Jerome Squalor pleaded. "In the name of injustice!
Lemony Snicket
#89. The bears bear hard hard yarn yarns you are unlikely to be confused.
Lemony Snicket
#90. Don't be a smart aleck," Hungry said.
"But it cheers me up," I said.
Lemony Snicket
#91. Someone feeling wronged is like someone feeling thirsty. Don't tell them they aren't. Sit with them and have a drink.
Lemony Snicket
#92. There are many mysteries I have never solved, and the hair of my chaperone is perhaps my most curious unsolved case.
Lemony Snicket
#93. Time after time he[Count Olaf] had come very close to succeeding, and time after time the Baudelaire orphans had revealed his plan, and time after time he had escaped-and all Mr. Poe had ever done was cough.
Lemony Snicket
#95. It pain me to tell you that once again Count Olaf would appear with yet another disgusting scheme, and that Mr. Poe would once again fail to do anything even remotely helpful.
Lemony Snicket
#96. The trouble with being patient is that eventually you get tired of it.
Lemony Snicket
#97. By 'aha' she means 'one minute' Stephano claims he knows nothing about snakes, the next he claims he is an expert! By 'aha' she means 'Stephano has been lying to us'. By 'aha' she means 'we've finally exposed his dishonesty to you'! By 'aha' she means 'aha'!
Lemony Snicket
#98. People aren't either wicked or noble. They're like chef's salads, with good things and bad things chopped and mixed together in a vinaigrette of confusion and conflict.
Lemony Snicket
#99. In this book, not only is there no happy ending, there is no happy beginning and very few happy things in the middle.
Lemony Snicket
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