Quotes About Knock Knock Jokes

#1. I like to wear a "Do Not Disturb" sign around my neck so that little kids can't tell me knock-knock jokes. "Hey, how ya doin'? Knock-knock." "Read the sign, punk!"

Mitch Hedberg

#2. I think it's worth trying to be a mother who delights in who her children are, in their knock-knock jokes and earnest questions. A mother who spends less time obsessing about what will happen, or what has happened, and more time reveling in what is.

Ayelet Waldman

#3. What I say is stupid. Who takes a comedian seriously? I'm doing sophisticated knock-knock jokes.

Carlos Mencia

#4. I enjoy darker sardonic wit more than knock-knock jokes. I spent the first healthy chunk of my career playing all-American, pleasant, average, nice people, so it's fun to have some complications there.

Neil Patrick Harris

#5. Once on stage, I was thinking of something else, and I forgot my line. I became so frightened. The girl I was playing with also became so frightened, she couldn't give me the next line. I just walked off stage.

Maria Karnilova

#6. Schadenfreude is as old as the Scriptures. Believe me, when the girls in the Red Sea bowling league heard that Lot's wife had morphed into a pillar of salt, the deer-lick jokes flew.

Dennis Miller

#7. Stan Ulam was lazy, ... He talked too much ... He was self-centered ... He had an overpowering personality.

Gian-Carlo Rota

#8. That's one of the compensations for being mediocre. One doesn't have to worry about becoming mediocre.

Rebecca Goldstein

#9. It's important to realize that sometimes the information you need is hidden behind the information available.

Anne Elizabeth Moore

#10. We can possess many great lands by faith.

Lailah Gifty Akita

#11. If you think the worst you'll get the worst, but if you think the best ... "
"and then everything will blow up in your face anyway. Don't you get the punchline yet? Its the great cosmic practical joke: Knock knock, who's there? Big kick in the Ass.

Brad Meltzer

#12. Get into the relationship for the right reason because it's a great support system, because it's a great compliment to your life, because it's someone that actually fulfills you and makes you happy.

Wilmer Valderrama

#13. If I just go out and play, the rest will take care of itself. That's what my parents taught me. They haven't been wrong yet.

Ryan Howard

#14. Israel has incredible entrepreneurial spirit and a deep bench of technology talent.

Roelof Botha

#15. Why did the warrior cross the road? [Koldo]
That's easy. To kill the guy on the other side. [Nicola]
A bud of amusement had her smiling.
Knock, knock. [Koldo]
Who's there? [Nicola]
Donut.
Donut who?
Donut run from me, puny girl.

Gena Showalter

#16. Do you suppose kissing is like riding a bicycle?

Dawn M. Turner

#17. Sometimes the past is the best memories you lived ever cause it'll never repeat again

Christine Minasian

#18. You can't do anything unless you do it yourself. And usually you can't do it yourself very well.

E.W. Howe

#19. The most sophisticated people I've ever known had just one thing in common: they were all in touch with their inner children.

Jim Henson