Top 100 Poehler Quotes
#1. I've always idolized Amy Poehler, because I think she's the best of the best as far as female comedy.
Kristen Bell
#2. So many people: Lucille Ball is the earliest incarnation of a woman I thought was funny, Joan Rivers, Roseanne, Carol Burnett, Gilda Radnor, down to current times, where you have Amy Poehler, Tina Fey, and Kristen Wiig.
Chelsea Peretti
#3. Amy Poehler, Kristen Wiig, Maya Rudolph - when they speak, everyone listens. Because they're freaking hilarious.
Casey Wilson
#4. I love people like Tina Fey and Amy Poehler, people who create and write their own stuff - especially when there's just not enough cool, interesting characters out there.
Debby Ryan
#5. Just to be on set with Amy Poehler, who's one of my heroes, was a total dream come true.
Tatiana Maslany
#6. The only pressure comes form myself. I put pressure on myself at first just because I was intimidated. When I made Amy Poehler laugh, it was a big thing for me. She's been one of my role models since high school, because she started UCB, which is what I wanted to do since high school.
Aubrey Plaza
#7. Amy Poehler and I have been friends for so long, we're like Oprah and Gale. Only we're not denying anything.
Tina Fey
#8. If you're lucky enough to have a position where people listen to you, you should say stuff you believe in - but not if you're Jenny McCarthy. Then you should shut up. But if you're right, like Amy Poehler, then speak up.
Megan Amram
#9. I have found that she is as kind and caring a person as she is hilarious. Simply put, Amy Poehler is my hero.
Aziz Ansari
#10. I'll cough up the bitter truth right now, at the risk of losing my Feminism Club Decoder Ring: I didn't go see 'Inside Out' for Amy Poehler, though she's terrific. I went to see my dark prince, Lewis Black.
MaryJanice Davidson
#11. If there's one big thing you can take from Amy Poehler as a performer, it's committing, full on.
Andy Daly
#12. I've always dreamed of growing up to be Amy Poehler.
Amy Poehler
#13. I want to be host of 'SNL.' I want to work with Steven Spielberg, Leonardo DiCaprio, J.J. Abrams, Emma Stone and Tim Burton, Sean Penn, Cameron Crowe. I want to work with Adam Sandler - he is so funny - and Tina Fey and Amy Poehler.
David Mazouz
#14. What do you think Amy Poehler is doing right now?
Georgia Clark
#15. I'm more influenced by characters than standups. I love strong, comic women because it's so hard, and I have so much respect for anyone who can do it. I'm a big fan of Tina Fey and Amy Poehler and people like that.
Amy Hoggart
#16. People always think I'm Amy Poehler, which never bothers me. I mean, Amy Poehler is great.
Amy Sedaris
#17. Someone like Amy Poehler, I don't know, but I feel like I know her. I think everyone feels like they know her.
Abbi Jacobson
#18. And personally I will say that Amy Poehler deserves about a thousand trophies and so one is a good start, and I'm hoping this is the first of a thousand. That's my personal hope.
Michael Schur
#19. Everyone has a moment when they discover they love Amy Poehler.
Mindy Kaling
#20. Any time you talk to anyone about something that they love, they're, like, their most beautiful. It's a cool gift to get to talk to people about what they love.
Amy Poehler
#21. The minute anyone makes you feel weird and non-included or not supported, you know, either beat it or tell them to beat it.
Amy Poehler
#22. It's nice to be short, because people expect less from you.
Amy Poehler
#23. Emotions are like passing storms, and you have to remind yourself that it won't rain forever. You just have to sit down and watch it pour outside and then peek your head out when it looks dry.
Amy Poehler
#24. Stop whining about getting old. It's a privilege.
Amy Poehler
#25. I cried and cried in my Mad Men dress. Jon Hamm held me by the shoulders and looked at me and said, "I know this is very sad, but this is a really important show for me, so I'm going to need you to get your shit together." This made me laugh so hard I think I peed.
Amy Poehler
#26. We may all host ourselves to death, and if we're all dead who will host our funerals?
Amy Poehler
#27. Everyone needs love, never hurt a living thing [and] don't worry about the choices you make because everything will be fun because life is a closet filled with pool toys,
Amy Poehler
#28. don't get a Saturday where you can catch up. The sleep
Amy Poehler
#29. Sometimes we get defensive about what we feel guilty about.
Amy Poehler
#30. I think middle age begins once you start looking forward to eating dinner before six thirty, or when you call the cops when your next-door neighbor has a party.
Amy Poehler
#31. A top McCain policy adviser claimed this week that McCain's work in the Senate helped create the BlackBerry, saying, 'You're looking at the miracle that John McCain helped create.' He then handed the BlackBerry to McCain, who attempted to withdraw $20 from it.
Amy Poehler
#32. Because what else are we going to do? Say no? Say no to an opportunity that may be slightly out of our comfort zone? Quiet our voice because we are worried it is not perfect? I believe great people do things before they are ready.
Amy Poehler
#33. Be nice, tell your woman she is hot, never shame her, and never hurt her.
Amy Poehler
#34. I don't remember; I was in a rage haze. Also I was showing off, which can be at the very least embarrassingly transparent and at the very worst
Amy Poehler
#35. It's not communism, it's shouldn't be that everybody gets a try no matter how good or bad they are. It's our profession and our art, so we should eventually strive to be working with the best people.
Amy Poehler
#36. Acting is always something I thought I could do, and I thought I would be pretty good at it, but I thought that I missed the opportunity, that it was too late.
Greg Poehler
#37. Symmetry is pleasing but not as sexy. Einstein is cool but Picasso knows what I'm talking about.
Amy Poehler
#38. You don't take food home from restaurants in Sweden.
Greg Poehler
#39. Fake boobs are weird ya'll" read by Patrick Stewart.
Amy Poehler
#40. Short people DO NOT like to be picked up.
Amy Poehler
#41. People are very bad and very good. A little love goes a long way.
Amy Poehler
#42. We plan on delivering our baby to the soundtrack of Pink Floyd's The Wall while simultaneously watching The Wizard of Oz. If this kid works with us, we guarantee your minds will be blown! The
Amy Poehler
#43. I mean, if my phone is trying to kill me then that crazy X-ray machine at airport security is a straight-up assassin.
Amy Poehler
#44. Aw, I feel bad if [Taylor] was upset. I am a feminist, and she is a young and talented girl. That being said, I do agree I am going to hell. But for other reasons. Mostly boring tax stuff.
Amy Poehler
#45. The great thing about taking big chances when you're younger is you have less to lose, and you don't know as much. So you take big swings.
Amy Poehler
#46. There's power in looking silly and not caring that you do.
Amy Poehler
#47. I firmly believe that every boy needs his mom to love him and every girl needs her dad to pay attention to her.
Amy Poehler
#48. Hey Lady I don't want to fuck you husband .
Amy Poehler
#50. If you only get one roller-coaster ride, you don't want to be thinking about the second one when you're on it.
Greg Poehler
#51. I have told people that writing this book has been like brushing away dirt from a fossil. What a load of shit. It has been like hacking away at a freezer with a screwdriver.
Amy Poehler
#52. Kiss every baby, and pet every dog. Walk slowly, and lie down when you're tired. What's next?
Amy Poehler
#53. I am old enough now to know I know nothing
Amy Poehler
#54. I cannot stress enough that the answer to life's questions is often in people's faces. Try putting your iPhones down once in a while, and look in people's faces. People's faces will tell you amazing things. Like if they are angry, or nauseous or asleep.
Amy Poehler
#55. The federal government began investigating allegations of fraud against the Coalition Provisional Authority, a U.S. contractor accused in a bid-rigging operation involving millions of dollars. Asked to comment, a spokesperson for Halliburton said, 'Millions? With an M? That is adorable.'
Amy Poehler
#56. I've said this before, that, when you're in school and you're the class clown, men are really good at making fun at other people and women are really good at making fun of themselves.
Amy Poehler
#57. I get a little itchy if I don't have some control.
Amy Poehler
#58. I just want to help other women achieve as much as they can in society without restraints being imposed on us. It's the most natural and normal thing to want to defend your rights to equal opportunities, equal pay for equal work, and everything that comes with that.
Amy Poehler
#59. During a recent trip to Amsterdam, she sent me a picture of her smoking marijuana for the first time just because I asked her to.
Amy Poehler
#60. I didn't really watch 'Dallas,' so I wasn't as wowed by the idea of Patrick Duffy as Swedes were 'cause he's, like, the most famous guy in all of Sweden.
Greg Poehler
#61. Earlier today former Vermont Governor Howard Dean became the new head of the Democratic National Committee
no word on who will be the neck.
Amy Poehler
#63. An interesting thing about the beginning of our friendship and professional collaboration [with Tina Fey] was that the improve scenes we would do together were basically dramatic and not funny at all.
Amy Poehler
#64. If you can speak about what you care about to a person you disagree with without denigrating them or insulting them, then you may actually be heard.
Amy Poehler
#65. As the old saying goes, Don't ask for permission to sit on George Clooney's lap, beg for forgiveness once you do.
Amy Poehler
#66. My high school musical did not offer a shirtless Zac Efron but it did provide me with many lessons. I learned that I loved being in a theatre, attending rehearsals, and building sets. I loved listening to the director and groaning about rehearsing choreography
Amy Poehler
#67. I looked around and thought about my life. I felt grateful. I noticed every detail. That is the key to time travel.
Amy Poehler
#68. This kind of job is magic. It comes around once or twice in a lifetime if you're lucky. And thank god, because it's all-consuming and sometimes work should just be work.
Amy Poehler
#69. Fall, and figure out what to do on your way down.
Amy Poehler
#72. Well people love to go dirty and stuff like that. It's funny, because even really dirty things can kind of inspire, but all things inspire really dirty improv and monologues. So then really dirty things can inspire the exact opposite. It's kind of a crapshoot.
Amy Poehler
#73. In my high school yearbook I was voted third runner-up for "Most Casual." I never figured out if that meant most casual in dress or in overall manner. In any case, I didn't come in first. I guess the two ahead of me wanted it less.
Amy Poehler
#74. SLEEP AND I DO NOT HAVE A GOOD RELATIONSHIP. We have never been friends. I am constantly chasing sleep and then pushing it away.
Amy Poehler
#75. You aren't allowed to feel special, but no one knows the specific ways you are in pain.
Amy Poehler
#76. I am a firm believer that every few years one needs to shake one's life through a sieve, like a miner in the Yukon. The gold nuggets remain. The rest falls through like the soft earth it is.
Amy Poehler
#77. I used to have a terrific flat stomach but now it's kind of blown out after two giant babies used it as a short-term apartment.
Amy Poehler
#78. I don't miss the frustration of youth, the anticipation of love and pain, the paralysis of choices still ahead. The pressure of "What are you going to do?" makes everybody feel like they haven't done anything yet.
Amy Poehler
#79. My philosophy on love is that if it is The One, whatever the circumstances are, you'll figure it out. There's nothing too difficult to overcome.
Greg Poehler
#80. When you're a litigator, you write so much, so many briefs, over and over again, that you're kind of really focused on one document and have draft after draft, and really pay attention to every single word.
Greg Poehler
#81. Sometimes you need to know to quit while you're ahead or at least before things get much worse!
Amy Poehler
#82. President Bush threw out the first pitch Monday at Cincinnati's great American ball park. 18 Iraqis were killed.
Amy Poehler
#83. Anyway, this other nurse and I used to jump around in our underwear and kiss each other for fun. Oh wait, what I meant to say was that I answered phones and filed things.
Amy Poehler
#84. I get a bit nervous because I just want the show to go well. I think you always have to be a little bit nervous, or else you're a little checked-out, and that's maybe the time when you're not doing your best stuff, because you're kind of just checked-out and falling back on stuff.
Amy Poehler
#85. I am interested in people who swim in the deep end. I want to have conversations about real things with people who have experienced real things. [I'm tired of talking about movies and gossiping about friends.]
Amy Poehler
#86. Being snubbed is not always a bad thing at awards shows because you end up getting a lot of people coming up to you and telling you how great you are.
Amy Poehler
#87. I used to get my hair dyed at a place called Big Hair. It cost $15. They just used straight bleach, so my hair was the color of white lined paper, and my eyebrows looked like they were done with a thick black marker.
Amy Poehler
#88. Change is the only constant. Learn to surf your life instead of planting your feet.
Amy Poehler
#89. I created, wrote, produced, and starred in my first-ever acting gig!
Greg Poehler
#90. There's something so romantic about being broke in New York. You gotta do it. You have to live there once without any money, and then you have to live there when you have money. Let me tell you, of the two, the latter is far better.
Amy Poehler
#91. I don't watch a lot of comedy. For relaxation and escape, I watch shows about how people survive bear attacks. Or old episodes of 'Law and Order,' the Benjamin Bratt/Jerry Orbach era.
Amy Poehler
#92. It was hard to feel like somebody didn't like me. It felt like such a failure. I don't care as much now. It's really great. It's like I can finally eat spicy food without the gut ache later, or something similar. I have a stomach for other people not stomaching me. Or at least I am working on it.
Amy Poehler
#93. Let me offer this apology. Please excuse this self-indulgent preface. I know what I am doing. I am presenting a series of reasons as to why you should lower your expectations, so that you can be blown away by my sneaky insights about life and work. I am a grown woman. I know my own tricks!
Amy Poehler
#94. He was the first important person in my life to die, and when he did, it was the first time I realized that life is not fair or safe or even ours to own. I miss him.
Amy Poehler
#95. We [with Les Charles] started talking about hotel stories, and we found that a lot of the action was happening in the hotel bar. We actually thought of that while we were in a bar: "Why would anyone ever leave here?"
Amy Poehler
#96. I'm a moon junky. Every time I look at the moon I feel less alone and less afraid. I tell my boys that moonlight is a magic blanket and the stars above are campfires set by friendly aliens.
Amy Poehler
#97. You are all so good and I wish I were better. Now get out of here because I want to be where you are.
Amy Poehler
#98. You can control time. You can stop it or stretch it or loop it around. You can travel back & forth by living in the moment & paying attention. Time can be your bitch if you just let go of the 'next' & the 'before
Amy Poehler
#99. I really do believe that anything in life, any obstacle or challenge, can be made better with humor.
Amy Poehler
#100. It takes years as a woman to unlearn what you have been taught to be sorry for. It takes years to find your voice and seize your real estate.
Amy Poehler
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