Plz Quotes

#1. I flip open my phone to text Jessica:
Me: Guess who's pregnant?
Jess: u?
Me: Get real.
Jess: ur mom?
Me: yep
Jess: Mazel tov!?
Me: Don't congratulate me, plz
Jess: Could b worse
Me: How?
Jess: Could be u?
Me: I'm a virgin.
Jess: Nobody's perfect.

Simone Elkeles

#2. If you are following me on my path of life ... !!!
than plz try to stop it ... !! bcz there is no such thing like a PATH in my LIFE ... !
strange but true ... !!

Mit Ptel

#3. As I go musing through this mournful land Soothed by the pine-tree's solemn harmony, Thy well-loved image comes and walks by me. I seem to hold thee by the gentle hand And talk of things I dimly understand, That thy dear spirit set to mine may be As to an intricate lock the simple key.

John Barlas

#4. If we do not know our own history, we are doomed to live it as though it were our private fate.

Hannah Arendt

#5. Dumb fuckin' luck.

Martin Blank

#6. My girlfriend was just killed in a car accident. Devastating. I can't believe I'm only going to have sex with her one more time.

Anthony Jeselnik

#7. I'm not drunk onstage, although I've done that a couple of times when I was younger. It's partly just the way I talk - I talk like somebody in a rocking chair. I'm your 150-year-old grandmother.

Dylan Moran

#8. Landscape is more than flat land covered by floodwater, the seeping of peat bogs, a river of liquid pewter viewed from a sentry tower. It's an influence on what a person values, what she is willing to sacrifice or argue for.

Susan Vreeland

#9. Misdeeds of a few players and certain people cannot and should not bring bad name to hundreds of players who participated in the I.P.L. with full honesty. The reputation of the I.P.L. cannot be tarnished by a few greedy individuals.

Rajeev Shukla

#10. When you trust your gut, follow your heart, and use your head, magic happens!

Jodi Livon

#11. Everything I do is completely original-I made it up when I was a kid.

Claes Oldenburg

#12. Everything kills everything else in some way.

Ernest Hemingway,