Men S Room Quotes

#1. My job consists of basically masking my contempt for the assholes in charge, and, at least once a day, retiring to the men's room so I can jerk off while I fantasize about a life that doesn't so closely resemble Hell.

Kevin Spacey

#2. This all came of a conversation I had with [John] Steinbeck once when we were standing in a men's room somewhere. Steinbeck asked me why I didn't play the banjo any more and I told him that went out with the high-button shoes.

Eddie Condon

#3. Some of the most vivid writing in America is on the walls of restrooms. The men's room in the Albany, N.Y. railroad station, for instance, should be preserved as a national shrine: there is more wit there than in any Broadway hit!

Truman Capote

#4. It might if you were male, hanging upside down naked and got nervous, then whizzed all over yourself. Gravity is not your friend at that point. (Josie)
Eww. Save those tidbits for when you're in the men's room ... updating your contact information. (Terri)

Sherrilyn Kenyon

#5. The difference between Strauss and Ranieri?" says one trader still at Salomon. "That's easy. Strauss wouldn't stoop to use the men's room on the trading floor. He'd go upstairs. Lewie would piss on your desk.

Michael Lewis

#6. New Rule: Stop talking about "the gas prices under Obama." As if he's the guy out there changing the numbers on the sign with that long pole. And while they're at the gas station, Republicans who still think human activity doesn't affect air quality should poke their heads in the men's room.

Bill Maher

#7. It's always a longer walk to the men's room, buckaroo.

Gerard Way

#8. I went to Shea Stadium and used the men's room. Terrifying. There was this little kid looking at me through the crack [in the stall]. and I was like, "If you tell anyone what you've seen ... "

Elizabeth Gilbert

#9. Politics? Ha! You couldn't get into politics. You couldn't get in anywhere. You couldn't even get in the men's room at the Astor!

Jean Harlow

#10. I'll sweep the floors. I've picked up napkins in the men's room. I'm not above anything.

David Duffield

#11. I'd often slip and fall on the ice after last call, which explained the ever-present welts. If I were with a woman, I'd usually execute a precautionary vomit in the men's room in an effort avoid any ugly incidents once I got her back to her place. And they say chivalry is dead.

Dan Dunn

#12. You'd be amazed at the number of people who want to introduce themselves to you in the men's room. It's the most bizarre part of this entire thing.

John F. Kerry

#13. And no girl wants to be called by the wrong name when she's on her knees giving you head in the men's room. So, just to be safe, I went with baby.

Emma Chase

#14. The government bugged the men's room in the local disco lounge.

Don Henley

#15. Suddenly, this romantic agony was enriched by a less romantic one: I had to go to the bathroom. Needless to say, I couldn't let her know about this urge, for great lovers never did such things. The answer to "Romeo Romeo, wherefore art thou, Romeo?" was not "In the men's room, Julie.

Bill Cosby

#16. They sport haircuts that were apparently administered by a blind heroin addict in the men's room of a Bulgarian disco in 1978.

Dave Barry

#17. American business long ago gave up on demanding that prospective employees be honest and hardworking. It has even stopped hoping for employees who are educated enough that they can tell the difference between the men's room and the women's room without having little pictures on the doors.

Dave Barry

#18. I am an honest girl, M. le Vicomte de Chagny, and I don't lock myself up in my dressing-room with men's voices.

Gaston Leroux

#19. There's always got to be room for what you might call benign corruption. Nobody blames a man who steals food to feed his starving children, but on the other hand, somebody who picks up a badge and takes an oath to serve and protect; we do expect a certain level of essential honesty.

Denzel Washington

#20. I didn't know how men managed with something taking up so much room down there. And what the hell kind of design left a person's privates dangling loose in the air and changing sizes all the time?

Karen Chance

#21. There is room in today's world for men to wear dresses.

Andre Leon Talley

#22. The reason people burn out is not because people are going hard [after God]; it's because they are working and perusing with the wrong spirit-trying to do it in the eyes of men with the wrong reasons; trying to get into a room you are already in.

Mike Bickle

#23. When I'm really hot, I can walk into a room and if a man doesn't look at me, he's probably gay.

Kathleen Turner

#24. The bible does not say that a man's education makes room for him, but that his gifts does. Education is not the key to success, it doesn,t guarantee anything; it is your gift that is the key to success

Myles Munroe

#25. Relationship films are political. If a woman is sitting in a waiting room in an office and a man walks in and sits down, it's a political situation. If he decides to smoke, does he ask her or does he just light up? If he lights up, what does she do? It's politics.

Sydney Pollack

#26. It used to be I thought of death as a man something like Grandfather a friend of his a kind of private and particular friend like we used to think of Grandfather's desk not to touch it not even to talk loud in the room where it was.

William Faulkner

#27. He stood there for a moment looking around the silent room, shaking his head slowly. All these books, he thought, the residue of a planet's intellect, the scrapings of futile minds, the leftovers, the potpourri of artifacts that had no power to save men from perishing.

Richard Matheson

#28. Killing men is not like fencing. There's no room for fine touches in battle. Every second that you blade is stuck in one man's body is a second that another can use to skewer you.

Tim Stead

#29. You look at William Powell in My Man Godfrey and he's a butler in that and he's very dapper. He's a very refined gentleman. I liked playing around with that, with the good posture and a style, a panache, and a way of moving about the room.

Evan Peters

#30. All man's troubles come from not knowing how to sit still in one room.

Blaise Pascal

#31. We're smart enough to know we need to live in groups to survive, but we're still animals and we needs lots of room. In the case of the male of the species we also probably need that-guy-over-there's space. And his wife and cow, too.

Julia Phillips

#32. There we were, filled with pure animal need, as he pinned me to the wooden table, and cruelly whipped my naked bottom; the two of us sweaty and panting, me screaming, him grunting, our primal sexual natures overprinting the tea room's pretence at gentility, and refinement.

Fiona Thrust

#33. A moment before I had been safe of all men's respect, wealthy, beloved - the cloth laying for me in the dining room at home; and now I was the common quarry of mankind, hunted, houseless, a known murderer, thrall to the gallows.

Robert Louis Stevenson

#34. Question: If you put a psychologist in a room with a man who thinks he's Napoleon and leave them there for a year (or ten or twenty), will you end up with two Skinner men or two guys with their hands in their shirts? Answer: Insufficient data.

Stephen King

#35. People equate sexy with promiscuous. They think that because I'm shaped this way, I must be scandalous - like running around and bringing men into my hotel room. But it's just the opposite.

Jennifer Lopez

#36. I work a lot with men, and I work with wonderful men that I absolutely adore, but it's something that I'm now paying attention to - to seek out and make room for the talented women in all the technical fields and creative fields across the board.

Sara Bareilles

#37. In this little room full of people he was suffering the pangs of men whose egos lose their virginity - as happens when they overhear for the first time a beautiful woman's undiluted, full-strength opinion of their masculine selves.

Tom Wolfe

#38. Plato had defined Man as an animal, biped and featherless, and was applauded. Diogenes plucked a fowl and brought it into the lecture-room with the words, Here is Plato's man.

Diogenes

#39. I concluded by saying that the SEALs in that room truly gave meaning to George Orwell's observation that "people sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf." page 546

Robert M. Gates

#40. Man, Coach Brown, he's so relaxed. We've seen that guy dancing this week at practice and he's dancing in the locker room. It brings tears to guys' eyes and brings happiness to everybody.

Vince Young

#41. Love is lost in men's capricious minds, but in women's, it fills all the room it finds.

John Crowne

#42. A minor request," said Mazer. "Let's not refer to it as the training cage. 'Training' sounds laborious and regimented. Soldiers groan at the word. These men joined the IF to fight, sir. Let's call it the Battle Room.

Orson Scott Card

#43. I retreat to my room and lock the door. Lying on my bed, my brain cyclones with thoughts of men and boys and boys and men. All making the wrong choices.

S.M. Parker

#44. But the objection being raised was not due to the phrase's overall lack of verve; rather it was due to the word facilitate. Specifically, the verb had been accused of being so tepid and prim that it failed to do justice to the labors of the men in the room.

Amor Towles

#45. What cruel creatures men are. Our bodies tell us to love so many, but there's room in our hearts for so few.

Brian K. Vaughan

#46. A man, groundly learned already, may take much profit himself in using by epitome to draw other men's works, for his own memory sake, into short room.

Roger Ascham

#47. I walk into the office of the counselor and figure out a few things. His name is Bob. It's written on the plastic sign his door. Bob Kissock. Also, he wears too much cologne. It smells up the tiny room and makes me think of men wearing towels around their waists on TV commercials.

Janet Gurtler

#48. Frankly, as much as I love to improvise, it hasn't been difficult to stick to the script on 'Mad Men.' The writing is so precise, and the story so carefully crafted, that I don't think there's room - or need - for ad libbing. I could never come up with dialogue as lovely as these writers do, anyway.

Rich Sommer

#49. I'm at a point in my life where I have three kids. I'm a father, and you start to take stock and measure yourself as a man and see where there's room for growth.

Greg Bryk

#50. In a milieu of resignation, where the young men think of society as a closed room in which there are no values but the rejected rat race, ... it is extremely hard to aim at objective truth or world culture. One's own products are likely to be personal or parochial.

Paul Goodman

#51. My mother gave me an understanding that as good as you think you are, you're not so great. There's always room for improvement. The reality is when people don't have someone to give them a sense of guidance, and say, "Hey, man, that's not happening," it's really hard.

Stevie Wonder

#52. In the dark room where I began My mother's life made me a man. Through all the months of human birth Her beauty fed my common earth. I cannot see, nor breathe, nor stir, But through the death of some of her.

John Masefield

#53. Why is it that they have Bibles in every motel room? Why should a man want to read the Bible when he's with a woman alone in a motel room? Why would he be interested? Whatever he's praying for, he's already got!

Jackie Mason

#54. Back in the really olden days, dinner was seldom a ceremonial event for U.S. families. Only the very wealthy had a separate dining room. For most, meals were informal, a kind of rolling refueling; often only the men sat down.

Nancy Gibbs

#55. You know what, I think maybe it's because men like to fart, and the host wants to be able to sit in his writers' room and just pass gas freely. Me, I'm a lady. I'm dainty. I know to get up and leave the room and go to my office.

Wanda Sykes

#56. I have seen my father concede to utter defeat in the hospital room. I've heard him choke on sobs and whisper angry things to the god of the sky when he thought I was asleep at Lex's bedside. I know that those uniforms are worn by men - only men.

Lauren DeStefano

#57. When a man's verses cannot be understood, nor a man's good wit seconded with the forward child understanding, it strikes a man more dead than a great reckoning in a little room. Truly, I would the gods had made thee poetical.

William Shakespeare

#58. As when a window is opened a whiff of fresh air from the fields enters a stuffy room, so a whiff of youthfulness, energy, and confidence of success reached Kutuzov's cheerless staff with the galloping advent of all these brilliant young men.

Leo Tolstoy

#59. The sum of a man's problems come from his inability to be alone in a silent room.

Blaise Pascal

#60. Often, as a young actress, you find yourself being the only girl in a room full of men ... and one of the reasons why I like 'Grey's Anatomy' is because they have such strong female characters and the women really drive this show.

Rachael Taylor

#61. Teddy risked a look backward and nodded as he handed Henry his hat. The two men shook hands and then walked past each other Teddy moving in the direction of Henry's room and Henry the hat pulled down over his face toward the Cutting carriage that was waiting by the curb.

Anna Godbersen

#62. All men's miseries derive from not being able to sit quiet in a room alone.

Blaise Pascal

#63. It's a certain kind of hell, confessing your most humiliating sexual secrets to a room full of hairy middle-aged men.

Jessica Knoll

#64. Come fill up my cup, come fill up my can, Come saddle your horses, and call up your men; Come open the West Port, and let me gang free, And it's room for the bonnets of Bonny Dundee!

Walter Scott

#65. Tori felt like she'd accidentally wandered into the men's locker room. Everywhere she looked there was rippling muscle. Testosterone hung thick in the air, and she had the overwhelming urge to chop some wood or fix a carburetor... maybe skin an animal or two.

Bethany K. Lovell

#66. I actually tried to think of the story [Room] in gender-neutral terms at first and said to myself, "OK, would this work if it were a man?" Well no, you can't make a man pregnant, so it's got to be a woman.

Emma Donoghue

#67. I threw All the King's Men across the living room.

M. Pierce

#68. All sorrow has its root in man's inability to sit quiet in a room by himself.

Blaise Pascal

#69. I think it's time we women stopped carrying supplies for the entire family. If children don't have room to carry their own toys, if men don't have pockets in their pants, tougho.

Erma Bombeck

#70. To me to be a storyteller is you got to be able to speak the truth. You've got to be able to absorb life and take in life and be able to interpret it in a way that anybody in this room could say, "Man, that's my story. I can relate to that."

Common