John Swartzwelder Quotes

#1. The free market punishes irresponsibility. Government rewards it.

Harry Browne

#2. This guy was making me tired. "Thanks for the afternoon's entertainment," I said. "I'll flush a copy of my bill down the toilet. You should be getting it in a couple of days.

John Swartzwelder

#3. I was sleeping like a baby - waking up every three hours screaming and crapping my pants.

John Swartzwelder

#4. Kids have too much money these days, if you ask me.

John Swartzwelder

#5. Maybe forgiveness was giving the past less power to hurt me. Or even building new memories that were stronger than the painful ones.

Courtney C. Stevens

#6. I made a circular motion with my finger around my temple to indicate I thought this guy was crazy, forgetting that there was no one in the room to see this circular motion except him. He saw it and frowned.

John Swartzwelder

#7. If you can take advantage of a situation in some way, it's your duty as an American to do it.

John Swartzwelder

#8. Russell Brand has announced that he plans to write a series of children's books. First up: 'Horton Hears a Heroin Dealer.'

Joan Rivers

#9. They can kill the Kennedys. Why can't they make a cup of coffee that tastes good?

John Swartzwelder

#10. I'm 190 pounds of rock hard muscle, underneath 40 pounds of sturdy protective fat.

John Swartzwelder

#11. I still have a belief and a faith that some great things are still going to happen in my career. If I didn't believe that, it makes no sense for me to be out there, and on top of that, I know this is a period of time that God wants me to persevere through.

Michael Chang

#12. The style developed over decades, really, but I started out writing pretty traditional stories, then became impatient. It was a writer named Russell Edson who showed me that one could write in any way at all.

Lydia Davis

#13. As my exciting story began I was being punched in the stomach.

John Swartzwelder

#14. I try to maintain a positive attitude at all times, because clients notice little things like that, and if you're frowning and crying all the time and saying "why? why?", they get worried.

John Swartzwelder

#15. When you are in a good position you are sure to drive well and to be very concentrated in each corner.

Jean Alesi