Top 51 Humor Suspense Quotes
#2. Gino refilled my glass. "What a night. Booze, broads, and a barroom brawl.
Michael Murphy
#3. The suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.
Oscar Wilde
#5. Unless the she-wolf agrees, there's always a chance of rejection.
Terry Spear
#6. Give to the world the best you have and the best will come back to you.
Myrna Ericksen
#7. Brett will need some clothes if someone can drop some by."
"All we need is a bear rug," Meghan said.
Terry Spear
#8. Never run after a man or a bus, there's always another one in five minutes.
Cherry Adair
#9. You are such a wolf."
"When it comes to you? Absolutely.
Terry Spear
#10. Well why don't you lean over this counter a little more and give me your best kiss, and then I'll tell you if I want you to take me out to dinner.
Zack Love
#11. What's more important than recycling? Producing something to recycle.
Gordon Osmond
#12. The Boogeyman,' he said, just to be sure. 'The Boogeyman killed an employee of the President of the United States.'
The president nodded.
Some days, Zach thought, I really hate this job.
Christopher Farnsworth
#13. Stay on my six, he said, nuzzling the hair at her ear and breathing deeply the sweet scent of her.
You remember what that is, right?
It's your ass.
Lynn Raye Harris
#14. Zorro pulled her into his arms and crushed her against his body, kissing her soundly on the mouth.
"My, what a big sword you have, sir," she said, sweeping her hand over his sheathed sword.
"I'm fully armed," he said, "with that and more.
Terry Spear
#15. Never trust a woman hoarding a half-eaten bag of M&M's.
K.D. Harp
#16. There's always a bit of suspense about the particular way in which a given school year will get off to a bad start.
Frank Portman
#17. She shook her head. "I won't go."
His chuckle had absolutely no humor in it. "You say that
as if you have a choice."
"There is always a choice.
Aliyah Burke
#18. If he sees you in this apartment he will seriously murder you and then break up with me. And I really, really don't want him to break up with me, Linc."
"But murdering me, that's all good?
Trevion Burns
#19. Something can be very funny and then suddenly very terrifying-very exciting, and suddenly very ridiculous. I think that's what life is like, that's what interests me.
Joss Whedon
#20. The afternoon's glory was tainted by the voice on the other end. I was so very sorry not to have the pleasure of meeting you, Mr. Haines. You're not living up to your part of the bargain.
Davis Bunn
#21. Goddammit! How does the world keep spinning with women on the planet?
Ian St. John in THE POMPEII SCROLL
Jacqueline LaTourrette
#22. She came through the door the moment my beer arrived. Fortyish, salon-blonde, spray tan, fake boobs and real diamonds. Anywhere else it would be a bimbo alert, but in Florida it was just protective coloration.
C.I. Dennis
#23. Meaning, yes
I don't really exist except on the page or in the back of your brain. But if you think it's weird a fictional character's telling this story, you ain't seen what happened, yet.
Kyle Michel Sullivan
#24. Writing is not always a writer's playtime. It's actually a work in progress. Few understand this and mistakenly believe we're wasting time. But it's never a waste of time when doing what you love.
David Lucero
#25. No wonder Thanksgiving was my favorite - you can't buy it, wrap it, or put it under a tree, and even the greeting card companies can't seem to make a buck off of it. It's just a meal, with people who you love and who love you back, no matter what.
C.I. Dennis
#26. For me, suspense doesn't have any value if it's not balanced by humor.
Alfred Hitchcock
#27. The right things often happen for the wrong reason.
Alex Adam
#29. Fill me in on the details of your life."
"I thought you didn't give a shit."
"It'll give me something to do while I wait for you to stab me to death.
Christina Dodd
#30. She swore she'd never turn into her P.I. father...but that was before she ran over the body.
Lida Sideris
#31. Oh, God. Not again."
Not again?
"Do you make a habit of driving into people's houses?
Christina Dodd
#32. If I'm going down, I'm going down with lipstick on.
Beth Yarnall
#34. I frown. "Can you please explain this?"
He flashes us a grin. "That would ruin the suspense."
He disappears.
C.B. Cook
#35. You call that caring?! I call it a line of crap! The only thing you cared about begins with an "F" and ends with me losing my virginity!
Maggie Adams
#36. The moment seemed endless, but it was probably only half that.
Steve Toltz
#37. Focus. She's Maddie. Your friend. Would you eyeball Keith or Dane's butt like that? ~ Zach
Monique DeVere
#38. What exactly does the I in FBI stand for?" ~Maggie Mae Castro
Beth Yarnall
#39. The northern star changes its position every ten thousand years, but friendships can last for all eternity.
- RJPeters
R.J. Peters
#40. Never confuse lust for anything other than what it is. There isn't a man alive that wouldn't gladly take what you are so willing to offer."
"Any but you, apparently."
-Eric to Camile, Pawn of Innocence
Chameleon
#41. So much for the bimbo alert; if she read books like that, then there was a light on upstairs, above the splendid front porch.
C.I. Dennis
#42. You have a very attractive revenge streak in you. I like it. A lot." ~Maggie Mae Castro to FBI Special Agent Clive Poole
Beth Yarnall
#43. Suspense is very important. Even though this is humor and they're short stories, that theory of building suspense is still there.
Sergio Aragones
#44. I'd spent my whole career dealing with badasses taking care of my nine-month-old boy should be a lark.
C.I. Dennis
#45. I help others because I can, not because I expect something in return.
Amy Manemann
#47. Something you killed didn't stay dead? Wow. That must have really put some termites in your coffin.
Christopher Farnsworth
#48. When your ship comes in, don't be in the bathroom with your pants around your ankles."
quoted by Frank McNichols, father of Rose McNichols in A Nose for Hanky Panky, a Granite Cove Mystery
Sharon Love Cook
#49. Roger said, 'I don't know about having a shrink around all the time. Are you analyzing me right now?'
Sophie rolled her eyes. 'How original. No, I'm not analyzing you. It'd take a whole team of shrinks to figure out your crazy ass, and I simply don't have the time or energy.
Jennifer Lane
#50. If I was in deep shit with Lilian before, I was snorkeling at the waste treatment plant now.
C.I. Dennis
#51. Great. This girl was going to seriously mess with my ability to stay on parole. ~Maggie Mae Castro
Beth Yarnall
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