Humor And Swearing Quotes

#1. And there was this sweet-looking little old lady with her white hair in a bun and everything, the typical grandmother type, and she was swearing her head off. I guess Alzheimer's had brought out her inner sailor.

Vivian Vande Velde

#2. Everything is autobiography, even if one writes something that is totally objective. The fact that it's a subject that seizes you makes it autobiographical.

Lisel Mueller

#3. corgi 1. n. A high class hound, such as those that accompany the Queen. 2. n. A high class hound, such as the one that accompanies Prince Charles.

VIZ

#4. You learn very very quickly that it is mostly about swearing, actually. That's all you're doing, swearing, in a box with wheels.

Dylan Moran

#5. So go back to the books. They will comfort you and cheer you. If you earnestly work with them, neither sorrow nor anxiety nor distress nor suffering need trouble your mind any more, no, not evermore.

Walter Wangerin Jr.

#6. When we were on acid, we would go into the woods, because there was less chance that you would run into an authority figure. But we ran into a bear. My friend Duane was there, raising his right hand, swearing to help prevent forest fires. He told me, "Mitchell, Smokey is way more intense in person!"

Mitch Hedberg

#7. When did swearing become so easy? You still would never swear in front of your parents or most adults, but when you're with your friends it's like every fifth word. Why couldn't learning Spanish be that easy?

Charles Benoit

#8. Rick, I'm holding a do-I-give-a-shit-ometer in my hand, and the needle's not moving. Shut up.

Douglas Coupland

#9. How men fear the chaos of the world, I thought, and the yawning eternity hereafter. So we build patterns to explain its terrible mysteries and reassure ourselves we are safe in this world and beyond.

C.J. Sansom

#10. In one scene, when I was supposed to say, "In a pig's eye you are," what came out was, "In a pig's ass you are." Old habits die awfully hard.

Ava Gardner

#11. Agatha Christie n. A silent, putrid fart committed by someone in this very room, and only one person knows whodunnit.

VIZ

#12. Go fuck a cactus, classless cunt.

H.M. Ward

#13. I have a complex feeling about genre. I love it, but I hate it at the same time. I have the urge to make audiences thrill with the excitement of a genre, but I also try to betray and destroy the expectations placed on that genre.

Bong Joon-ho

#14. Emotional labor is what you get paid to do, and one of the most difficult types of emotional labor is staring into the abyss of choice and picking a path. Your

Seth Godin

#15. Oh,great.It's like we're being bussed in from the fucking projects," Aphrodite and "I'm hoping for urban renewal," Aphrodite grumbled.

P.C. Cast

#16. Jake leaned on the horn, swearing loudly. Gina covered her eyes. Doc flung his arms around me, burying his face in my lap, and Dopey, to my great surprise, began to scream like a girl, very close to my ear ...

Meg Cabot

#17. Apparently profanity had a way of making men listen.

Megan Shepherd