Top 100 Harry Dresden Sayings
#1. I've done smarter things in my life. Once, for example, I threw myself out of a moving car in order to take on a truckload of lycanthropes singlehandedly."
~Harry Dresden
Jim Butcher
#2. Harry Dresden. I'm on a mission from God.
Jim Butcher
#3. Harry Dresden. Saving the world, one act of random destruction at a time.
Jim Butcher
#4. Harry Dresden - I take responsibility for more impossible situations in the first twenty-four hours of being dead than most people do all day.
Jim Butcher
#5. I didn't have any money or ID. I didn't have a credit card. Hell, I didn't have a business card.
What would it say? 'Harry Dresden, Winter Knight, Targets Slain, No Barbecues, Waterslides, or Fireworks Displays.
Jim Butcher
#6. All right, you primitive screwheads. Listen up. I'm Harry Dresden. I'm the new Winter Knight.
Jim Butcher
#7. Its amazing waht you can get used to if your daily allowance of bizarre is high enough.' ... Harry Dresden
Jim Butcher
#8. Attention, shoppers! Discount specials on Harry Dresden's life. Slightly used, no refunds, limit one per customer. Shop smart. Shop S-Mart.
Jim Butcher
#9. Hey, Bogart. You and the wonder twins back off or the bedsheet gets it.
Harry Dresden, Death Masks.
Jim Butcher
#10. My name is Harry Dresden," I said.
Fitz stumbled. "Holy shit," he said. "Like ... that Harry Dresden? The professional wizard?"
"The one and only."
He recovered his pace and shook his head. "I heard you were dead."
"Well, yeah," I said, "but I'm taking it in stride.
Jim Butcher
#11. Whatever happened to "Ia, Ia, Cthulu fthtagn"? ... No one has a sense of style anymore
-Harry Dresden
Jim Butcher
#12. Marcone's scum, but he's his own scum -Harry Dresden
Jim Butcher
#13. No matter where you go, there you are. (Uriel to Harry Dresden)
Jim Butcher
#14. It would require a singularly stupid man to go hang around in narrow tunnels and cramped spaces alongside a threat like that.
"And I, Harry Dresden, am that man," I stated.
Jim Butcher
#15. I'd made the vampire cry. Great. I felt like a real superhero. Harry Dresden, breaker of monsters' hearts.
Jim Butcher
#16. My laboratory,' I said, experimentally, drawing out each syllable. 'Why is it that saying it like that always makes me want to follow it with 'mwoo-hah-hah-hahhhhh'? '
'You were overexposed to Hammer Films as a child?'
- Harry Dresden & Bob the Skull, Changes, Jim Butcher
Jim Butcher
#18. He had hard, steady eyes, and all the comforting, reassuring charm of a dental drill. - Harry Dresden describing Morgan
Jim Butcher
#19. Just because you're paranoid, it doesn't mean there isn't an invisible demon about to eat your face. Harry Dresden
Jim Butcher
#20. I guess being dead gives you a whole new perspective on life. - Harry Dresden
K. Bennett
#21. HARRY DRESDEN - WIZARD Lost Items Found. Paranormal Investigations. Consulting. Advice. Reasonable Rates. No Love Potions, Endless Purses, Parties, or Other Entertainment
Jim Butcher
#22. If your opponent has you by fifty pounds, winning a fight against him is a dubious proposition, at best. If your opponent has you by eight thousand and fifty pounds, you've left the realm of combat and enrolled yourself in Road-kill 101. Or possibly in a Tom and Jerry cartoon.
Jim Butcher
#24. I think that men ought to treat women like something other than weaker men with breasts.
Jim Butcher
#25. Just remember that you're on my list, Marcone. Soon as I get done with all the other evils in this town, you won't be the lesser of them anymore."
Marcone stared at me with half-lidded eyes and said, "Eek.
Jim Butcher
#26. A succubus on the set. Strike that, the health-conscious kid sister made it two ... succubuses. Succubusees? Succubi? Stupid Latin correspondence course.
Jim Butcher
#27. Hope is a force of nature. Don't let anyone tell you different.
Jim Butcher
#28. It doesn't make you a monster to want, she said, her voice very gentle. It's what you do with it that matters.
Jim Butcher
#29. Injun Joe studied the body for a moment, his eyes sad. Then he said, "I'd rather go in my sleep, I think." He glanced back at me. "What about you?"
"I want to be stepped on by an elephant while having sex with identical triplet cheerleaders," I said.
Jim Butcher
#30. I love being a wizard. Every day is like Disneyland.
Jim Butcher
#31. I was seducing shepherdesses when you weren't a twinkle in your great-grandcestor's eyes. I think I know what I'm doing.
Jim Butcher
#32. Put some clothes on, you weird, yellow-eyed, table-dancing, werewolf-training, cryptic, stare-me-right-in-the-eyes-and-don't-even-blink wench.
Jim Butcher
#33. I have been beaten, but I have not yielded. I'm not going to start yielding now.
Jim Butcher
#34. Hell's holy stars and freaking stones shit bells.
Jim Butcher
#35. Thwart," I said. "To prevent someone from accomplishing something by means of visiting gratuitous violence upon his smarmy person."
"I'm pretty sure that isn't the definition." Sarissa said.
"It is today.
Jim Butcher
#36. The building was on fire, and it wasn't my fault.
Jim Butcher
#37. Knowledge is the ultimate weapon. It always has been.
Jim Butcher
#38. I'd had a key to the marina's locks at one time, but I'd lost track of it when I got shot, drowned, died, got revived into a coma, haunted my friends for a while, and then woke up in Mab's bed.
(My life. Hell's bells.)
Jim Butcher
#39. I'm dealing with a lot of scary things. I think you have to react to them. And you either laugh at them or you go insane.
Jim Butcher
#40. Laugh whenever you can. Keeps you from killing yourself when things are bad. That and vodka.
Jim Butcher
#41. Nobody can be bad at everything. There's no such thing as a perfect screwup.
Jim Butcher
#42. You rush a miracle worker, you get lousy miracles!
Jim Butcher
#43. It isn't good to hold on too hard to the past. You can't spend your whole life looking back. Not even when you can't see what lies ahead. All you can do is keep on keeping on, and try to believe that tomorrow will be what it should be - even if it isn't what you expected.
Jim Butcher
#44. Being a wizard gives you more power than most, but it doesn't change your heart. We're all human. We're all of us equally naked before the jaws of pain.
Jim Butcher
#45. The Blue Beetle was not a clown car," I said severely. "It was a machine of justice.
Jim Butcher
#46. Tiny," Sanya rumbled to Michael, clenching a demonstrative fist. "But fierce.
Jim Butcher
#47. Evil isn't the real threat to the world. Stupid is just as destructive as Evil, maybe more so, and it's a hell of a lot more common. What we really need is a crusade against Stupid. That might actually make a difference.
Jim Butcher
#48. Wizards and computers get along about as well as flamethrowers and libraries.
Jim Butcher
#49. The man once wrote: Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards, for they are subtle and quick to anger. Tolkien had that one mostly right.
I stepped forward, let the door bang closed, and snarled, Fuck subtle.
Jim Butcher
#50. I've had a tense couple of days. And I've got to tell you, burning someone's face off sounds like a great way to relax.
Jim Butcher
#51. We have now left Reason and Sanity Junction. Next stop, Looneyville.
Jim Butcher
#52. I died. I died and someone made a clerical error and I am in Heaven.
Jim Butcher
#53. You're playing the creepy vibe a little hard," I said. "Might as well go for broke, put on a black top hat and pipe in some organ music.
Jim Butcher
#54. If I was on the road to Hell, at least I was going in style.
Jim Butcher
#55. There's nothing that makes you more insane than family. Or more happy. Or more exasperated. Or more ... secure.
Jim Butcher
#56. In the name of the Pizza Lord. Charge!
Jim Butcher
#57. I have nightmares about hell, where all I do is add up numbers and try to have conversations with people like you.
Jim Butcher
#58. You predicted quick victory. Now it's going to get hopelessly complicated. Jesus, don't you know any better than that by now?
Jim Butcher
#59. For the sake of one soul. For one loved one. For one life." I called power into my blasting rod, and its tip glowed incandescent white. "The way I see it, there's nothing else worth fighting a war for.
Jim Butcher
#60. You're such a cynic," Molly said. "I think cynics are playful and cute.
Jim Butcher
#61. Hush, Harry. Or you'll go to the special hell.
I blinked at that, confused. I'm not supposed to be the guy who doesn't get the reference joke, dammit.
Jim Butcher
#62. I still can't believe," Michael said, sotto voce, "that you came to the Vampires' Masquerade Ball dressed as a vampire.
Jim Butcher
#63. Harry," she said quietly, "I know you must be angry."
I burn things to ash and smash holes in buildings when I'm angry," I said. "I'm a couple of steps past that point right now.
Jim Butcher
#65. Unicorns," I said. "Very dangerous. You go first.
Jim Butcher
#66. Mac folded his arms on the bar and looked at me intently and said, in a resonant baritone, "You've got to be very careful, Harry."
I looked at him, shocked. He'd ... used grammar.
Jim Butcher
#67. Black Court vampires. I just shortened it some."
Ebenezar tsked. "Blampires. That's the problem with you young people. Shortening all the words.
Jim Butcher
#68. Life is too short, Harry. And there's nowhere near enough joy in it. If you find it, grab it. Before it's gone.
Jim Butcher
#69. Every soul is special. They're all beautiful. They're all far more significant than anyone on this rock realizes. I think when people are at their best, they're acting in accordance with their soul. The ones who have gone bad don't have bad souls. They've just given up on keeping in touch with them.
Jim Butcher
#70. I don't know about your true form, but the weight of your ego sure is pushing the crust of the earth toward the breaking point.
Jim Butcher
#71. It came charging toward me, several hundred pounds of angry-looking monster, and I did the only thing any reasonable wizard could have done.
I turned around and ran like hell.
Jim Butcher
#72. Michael half-smiled. "The Lord will never give you a burden bigger than your shoulders can bear, Harry. All we can do is face what comes and have faith."
I gave him a sour glance. "I need to get myself some bigger shoulders, then. Someone in accounting must have made a mistake.
Jim Butcher
#73. Maybe they'd use biological or chemical weapons instead. Maybe they'd crash the world economy. Maybe they'd turn every program on television into one of those reality shows."
"That's mostly done already, Harry."
"Oh. Well. I've got to believe that the world is worth saving anyway.
Jim Butcher
#75. Most of the bad guys in the real world don't know that they are bad guys. You don't get a flashing warning sign that you're about to damn yourself. It sneaks up on you when you aren't looking.
Jim Butcher
#76. You backbiting, poisonous, treacherous, deceitful, wicked, clever girl. If this works I'll buy you a pony.
Jim Butcher
#77. Maybe," he said in a slow, rural drawl, "you could explain to me why I found you in the middle of an orgy."
"Well," I said, "if you're going to be in an orgy, the middle is the best spot, isn't it.
Jim Butcher
#78. Maybe you know the monsters, Martin," Murphy said quietly. "But I know the guy who stops them. And if they don't return the girl, we'll make them regret it." She nodded at me and said, "Let's go. We can watch Dresden kill the bitch.
Jim Butcher
#79. Laughter is good for you. Nine out of ten stand-up comedians recommend laughter in the face of intense stupidity.
Jim Butcher
#80. There're things we keep hidden from one another. Things we hide from ourselves. Things that are kept hidden from us. And things no one knows. You always learn the damnedest things at the worst possible times.
Jim Butcher
#81. There's a fine line between audacity and idiocy.
Jim Butcher
#82. Fear is a part of life. It's a warning mechanism. That's all. It tells you when there's danger around. Its job is to help you survive. Not cripple you into being unable to do it.
Jim Butcher
#83. The last time I was at a supernatural shindig, I got poisoned and then everything there tried to kill me. So I burned the whole place to the ground.
Jim Butcher
#84. There are things you can't walk away from. Not if you want to live with yourself afterward.
Jim Butcher
#85. The best thing about my faerie godmother is that the creepy just keeps on coming.
Jim Butcher
#86. A bolt of warmth, fierce with joy and pride and gratitude, flashed through me like sudden lightning. I don't care about whose DNA has recombined with whose. When everything goes to hell, the people who stand by you without flinching - they are your family. And they were my heroes.
Jim Butcher
#87. Yeah, they look great, but that isn't a fantasy come true, Harry. That's a wood chipper in Playboy bunny clothing.
Jim Butcher
#88. EASTER HAS BEEN CANCELED - THEY FOUND THE BODY
Jim Butcher
#89. Same result, only I'd be steam-cooked instead of roasted.
Jim Butcher
#90. Faeries like pizza?" I asked.
"Oh, Harry," Toot said breathlessly. "Haven't you ever had pizza before?"
"Of course I have," I said.
Toot looked wounded. "And you didn't share?
Jim Butcher
#91. Discretion is the better part of not getting exsanguinated.
Jim Butcher
#92. I choose my battles, Dresden. Not you." She looked up at me calmly. "Let me put this in terms that will get through your skull: My friend is going to save a child from monsters. I'm going with him. That's what friends do, Harry.
Jim Butcher
#93. Many things are not as they seem: The worst things in life never are.
Jim Butcher
#94. She is not a cookie. Neither is she a biscuit, a PopTart, Sweet TART, apple tart, or any other kind of pastry. She is my apprentice.
Jim Butcher
#95. Ha-ha! Ah-hahahaha! I am wizard; hear me roar!
Jim Butcher
#96. But the only way never to do the wrong thing is never to do anything.
Jim Butcher
#97. Karrin, eh?" Thomas asked.
I nodded. "She's real serious about order. A man dying, she can understand. A man coming back. That's different."
"Isn't she Catholic?" Thomas asked. "Don't they have a guy?
Jim Butcher
#98. The wacky thing about those bad guys is that you can't count on them to be obvious. They forget to wax their mustaches and goatees, leave their horns at home, send their black hats to the dry cleaner's. They're funny like that.
Jim Butcher
#99. I made a sandwich out of things. I'm an American. We can eat anything as long as it's between two pieces of bread.
Jim Butcher
#100. Jobs are a part of life. Maybe you've heard of the concept. It's called work? See, what happens is that you suffer through doing annoying and humiliating things until you get paid not enough money. Like those Japanese game shows, only without all the glory.
Jim Butcher
Famous Authors
Popular Topics
Scroll to Top
