Funny Urinal Quotes

#1. I can't reveal the mystery to either saint or sinner; I can't state at length what I've said curtly; I achieve an altered state that I can't explain; I have a secret that I cannot share.

Omar Khayyam

#2. I think. Therefore, I am. I think."
- Anonymous

I found this written in tiny letters in the grout between the wall tiles above a urinal in a restroom at the University of Washington, circa 1980. I don't know if Descartes would have approved but I thought it was brilliant.

Gary Val Tenuta

#3. I never thought much about public displays of "Will you marry me?" It seems more like putting on a show for others rather than an intimate, private and special moment between two people.

Donna Lynn Hope

#4. What passes for culture in my head is really a bunch of commercials.

Kurt Vonnegut

#5. All I have learned in the twenty years that I have been a monk I can sum up in one sentence: All that arises passes away. This I know.

Eckhart Tolle

#6. We would continue our commitments, president and cabinet, to the manner of negotiations as a strategic and political reality, through which we would pick up the fruits of our struggle and our people's sacrifice.

Mahmoud Abbas

#7. All publicity is good, except an obituary notice.

Brendan Behan

#8. I can't imagine being a woman in the world of acting, like where you age starts to weigh you down - you go from being attractive to where they [directors] decided you're out ... I feel like with stand-up comedy, it doesn't matter if I've gotten fatter.

Jim Jefferies

#9. General Electric backed the Carousel of Progress, which featured an Audio-Animatronic housewife, standing in her futuristic kitchen, singing about a great big beautiful tomorrow.

Eric Schlosser

#10. Life forms a surface that acts as if it could not be otherwise, but under its skin things are pounding and pulsing.

Robert Musil

#11. Greed stains our culture, soaks our sensibilities and has replaced grace as a sign of our intimacy with the divine.

Jennifer Stone

#12. What we are is God's gift to us. What we become is our gift to God.

Eleanor Powell

#13. Over the last 15 years we've developed our brand into a global brand and we wanted our giving to follow suit.

Tommy Hilfiger

#14. What we see taking place in the church today is the reduction of God to an idol.

Peter Rollins

#15. Unless inside, where no one sees, our soul is kneelling, too, a prayer is not so likely to get through.

Elaine A. Cannon