Dieting Humor Quotes

#1. Dessert doesn't count if you're sharing someone else's.

Elizabeth Jane Howard

#2. Hank Promise's niece. But he'd talk to Mandy

Lisa Mondello

#3. I love spending time with my dog, my niece and my family. I'm very family-oriented.

Lil' Kim

#4. The calf scramble will be during both rodeo performances and consist of children attempting to catch and halter several loose calves. If a child succeeds, he or she will receive a certificate to purchase a breeding animal to raise and bring back to the livestock show next year.

Kim Carnes

#5. And when all feels hopeless, remember that you are in charge of what goes into your body, you don't answer to anyone, and you are allowed to eat anything you want. Often just knowing we can eat whatever we want is enough to keep us from eating whatever we want. We're so rebellious.

Rory Freedman

#6. Dieting makes me want to murder everyone around me.

David Foster Wallace

#7. My mother used to say you should eat like a king in the morning, a queen at noon, and a pauper at night

K.S.R. Burns

#8. Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.

Dave Barry

#9. God grant me the serenity to accept my goal weight, the courage to resist anything with more than three hundred calories, and the wisdom to check the fat grams before I open my mouth and insert a fork.

Shirley Jump

#10. She was every inch the skeletal goddess that had been promised by the bones of her feet.

Jefferson Smith

#11. I have to not harden my heart, because I want to stay open to feel things.

Dolly Parton

#12. Free drinks have no carbs.

Nicki Elson

#13. ...the thing about dieting is that it's really horrible and boring for a longer period of time than feeling pretty in small jeans feels. That's just basic math.

Brittany Gibbons

#14. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble. Matthew 6:34

Anonymous

#15. The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates.

Dave Barry