Top 39 Auslander Quotes
#1. Dear Lord; we beg but one boon more: Peace in the hearts of all men living, peace in the whole world this Thanksgiving.
Joseph Auslander
#2. I moved a pillow aside ... preferring the joyful company of the delusional to the miserable company of the sane.
Shalom Auslander
#3. The greatest source of misery in the world, the greatest cause of anguish and hatred and sadness and death, was neither disease nor race nor religion. It was hope.
Shalom Auslander
#4. If television once could be seen as ranking among a number of vehicles for conveying expression or information from which we could choose, we no longer have that choice: the televisual has become an intrinsic and determining element of our cultural formation.
Philip Auslander
#5. You can hope all you want for a happy ending, but sometimes, like it or not, the guy writing your story is working on a tragedy; you may not even be the main character.
Shalom Auslander
#6. Kugel wondered if in these days of the Internet you would even need a Miep Gies anymore, if you could make it through a genocide these days with just a smartphone and a credit card, and he was hopeful that in the event of another Holocaust, he would have some sort of broadband Internet access.
Shalom Auslander
#7. Maybe when I'd dead, he thought. Maybe when I'm dead I'll get some goddamned sleep.
Shalom Auslander
#8. So desperate was Kugel for things to turn out for the best, proclaimed Professor Jove, that he couldn't stop worrying about the worst. Hope, said Professor Jove, was Solomon Kugel's greatest failing.
Shalom Auslander
#9. Every Jew was the last Jew; Tevye the Terminal, every single one. Yet, Kugel couldn't help but observe, in all that time - no last Jew. There had been a last Assyrian. There had been a last Ammonite. There had been a last Babylonian, a last Mesopotamian, a last of the Mohicans. But no last Jew.
Shalom Auslander
#10. Kugel set off, the wind in what would have been, some years ago, his hair.
Shalom Auslander
#11. He took the diary from Mother's hand and turned it over. The heartbreaking something, he read, of a tragic whatever.
Shalom Auslander
#12. Suck is life,[ ... ]:you get to a point, one day, where you are hoping to find crap; where the best possible outcome of all possible outcomes would be the discovery, praise Jesus, of a pile of shit
Shalom Auslander
#13. The Kugels, Kugel hated to admit, might just have to, in the event of genocide, rely on the kindness of strangers.
Mother used to say: I can name six million people who relied on the kindness of strangers.
Shalom Auslander
#14. Let him be floored, O Lord, thought Kugel.
Let him be stunned.
Let him be flabber-fucking-gasted.
Shalom Auslander
#15. Hiding from genocide inside a Jew's attic, thought Kugel, is like hiding from a lion inside a gazelle.
Shalom Auslander
#16. What a world, thought Kugel; whoever you were, wherever you were, whatever time of the day or night, you could open your back door and call out I know you're out there motherfucker, and nine times out of ten you'd be right.
Shalom Auslander
#17. My rabbis taught me that it was wrong to say God caused the Holocaust; that he simply, in 1938, turned His head. He looked away.
Shalom Auslander
#18. My point is that death is more tragic than life, than any life, because every life has hope of some kind.
Shalom Auslander
#19. I kind of like it up here, Kugel said. It's got a certain fatalistic charm, a certain je ne sais fucked.
Shalom Auslander
#20. His hope was that she would finish her damn book quietly and just leave; that one morning he would awaken and go up to the attic, and Anne Frank would be gone, and he could go on with his life, Anne-free. One hundred percent Frankless. Now with Less Genocide.
Shalom Auslander
#21. Kugel was a firm believer that death was not always a bad thing - that life often reached such levels of crapitude that dying was preferable to living.
Shalom Auslander
#22. Stop expecting more from us than we can possibly provide, and you'll stop being so disappointed.
Shalom Auslander
#23. This, said Mother, as she handed him a piece of dry, tasteless matzoh, is the bread of our affliction. Where, young Kugel wondered, is the seven-layer cake of our salvation? Where is the muffin of our mirth? Where is our no-longer-reduced-to-jelly doughnut?
Shalom Auslander
#24. The dilemma of Brechtian performance is that, for all of Brecht's emphasis on rationality and the undermining of theatrical illusion, the actor must convincingly portray something that she is not.
Philip Auslander
#25. Roads are no place for naive chickens dreaming of nirvana.
Shalom Auslander
#26. There is hurt in this world. There is pain. Hoping there won't be only makes it worse.
Shalom Auslander
#27. Written with passion, honesty, humor, and a stubborn, rebellious optimism, Dear Marcus is like nothing I've ever read. When a bullet in the back told Jerry McGill not to go on, Jerry went on-smiling.
Shalom Auslander
#28. I will not make a sonnet from
Each little private martyrdom;
Nor out of love left dead with time
Construe a stanza or a rime.
We do not suffer to afford
The searched for and the subtle word:
There is too much that may not be
At the caprice of prosody.
Joseph Auslander
#30. In theatre, presence is the matrix of power; the postmodern theatre of resistance must therefore both expose the collusion of presence with authority and resist such collusion by refusing to establish itself as the charismatic Other.
Philip Auslander
#32. He could pull this off. He was sure of it. It would have been one thing to protect Anne Frank from the Nazis; he was pretty sure he couldn't have managed that. But protecting his family from Anne Frank? How difficult could that be?
Shalom Auslander
#33. I spent the best years of my life atoning for something I didn't do, something my parents didn't do, something done just about before I was ever even born. I got no complaints with that, but I'm about all atoned out, and I ain't yet gotten round to atoning for the things I did do.
Shalom Auslander
#34. Write something dangerous. Say something you shouldn't. Blow something up. But well.
Shalom Auslander
#35. His intelligence only exacerbated the guilt Kugel felt for bringing him into the world. It was one thing to have condemned a child to life, that was criminal enough, but life was a sentence more easily served by fools.
Shalom Auslander
#36. Vans are the vehicles of murderers. Serial Killers. Rapists. Thieves. Nothing good ever happens in a van. Police should be allowed to arrest van drivers without cause. The van is the cause, asshole.
Shalom Auslander
#37. Sages tell us that the Torah tells us that until the age of thirteen, all of boy's sins are ascribed to his father.
Shalom Auslander
#38. SOLOMON KUGEL
His performance, of late,
had been subpar.
Born, unfortunately. Died eventually.
Shalom Auslander
#39. I believe in a personal God; everything I do, He takes personally.
Shalom Auslander
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