Walter Matthau Quotes

#1. I don't mind my wife having to last word. In fact I'm delighted when she reaches it.

Walter Matthau

#2. My mother paid eight dollars a month for rent. When she had it. Mostly we were evicted, because she couldnt afford to pay the eight dollars a month.

Walter Matthau

#3. The first girl you go to bed with is always pretty.

Walter Matthau

#4. We're writing a book together. She just finished one. Did you read it? Among the Porcupines?

Walter Matthau

#5. I wanted to be a pharmacist. I liked the way our local pharmacist was always dressed in a nice white coat; he looked very calm, you'd give him money, and he'd give you something that you wanted to buy.

Walter Matthau

#6. I have more talent in my smallest fart than you have in your entire body.

Walter Matthau

#7. It's very easy to live here. You're anonymous here. Nobody knows who you are.

Walter Matthau

#8. Why don't you do the world a favour. Pull your bottom lip up over your head and swallow.

Walter Matthau

#9. Every actor looks all his life for a part that will combine his talents with his personality ... 'The Odd Couple' was mine. That was the plutonium I needed. It all started happening after that.

Walter Matthau

#10. I always had one ear offstage, listening for the call from the bookie.

Walter Matthau

#11. My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more.

Walter Matthau

#12. You see, my father was a Catholic priest, Greek Orthodox, but I think he started out as a Jew, then he became a Catholic priest.

Walter Matthau

#13. Get out of show business. Its the best advice I ever got, because Im so stubborn that if someone would tell me that, I would stay in it to the bitter end.

Walter Matthau

#14. To be successful in show business, all you need are 50 good breaks.

Walter Matthau

#15. There's no such thing as 'too late!' That's why they invented death!

Walter Matthau

#16. I never worked with Marilyn Monroe, but if she'd lived, I think she would have been all right. She would have been President of the United States.

Walter Matthau