Susan Bischoff Quotes

#1. I should get points for not saying every dumb thing that pops in my head.

Susan Bischoff

#2. You realize, of course, that you are a complete idiot.
Well, conscience, I'd say that much is obvious.

Susan Bischoff

#3. Because that's where I keep my Great Big Book of Manners by Emily Post and I want to beat you with it.

Susan Bischoff

#4. Tim and Raine are coming in."
"Are they insane?"
"Apparently.

Susan Bischoff

#5. How two people can be so completely in sync and so completely clueless about each other at the same time is absolutely beyond my ability to comprehend.

Susan Bischoff

#6. Just think of a safe location."
"Are there tennis balls in the soup?"
"Come on, be serious."
"A pear camping highway fire mask," he said, more intensely.
My heart rate, which had finally started slowing, sped up again.

Susan Bischoff

#7. Oh my God, cheese burn!

Susan Bischoff

#8. Dylan, while he is in the shower and he and Joss are only seperated by the curtain and his invisibility:
Dylan: "Maybe if you would come in here and scrub my back it would speed things up."
Joss: "I'm not invisible."
Dylan: "I know this.

Susan Bischoff

#9. Parental looks rely a lot on brow positioning. Whereas the Dad Look involves the lowering of the brow as a whole, the Mom Look takes advantage of the power of the single, raised brow. Of Doom.

Susan Bischoff

#10. You know, you guys have been dancing around each other for so long you could cut the sexual tension with a knife. It's a wonder you didn't rip each other's clothes off the minute you got over yourselves and got together."
"For crissakes, Heather.

Susan Bischoff

#11. Dylan: I'd stolen chocolate from there, back when I was into that kind of thing. Stealing, not chocolate ... whatever.

Susan Bischoff