Steve Kluger Quotes

#1. It's not just the people we love, but the people we let love us back who show us how high we can really soar.

Steve Kluger

#2. When T falls in love, he does it with the whole world at once.

Steve Kluger

#3. Like there's actually a need for Greenland. You can get ice at 7-Eleven.

Steve Kluger

#4. Why do guys insist on wearing those odious jeans with their rear ends hanging down around their ankles? Do they really think it's hot?

Steve Kluger

#5. It doesn't matter what people thinks of you as long as you know that your heart and head are in the right place.

Steve Kluger

#6. My waist is a 30. The jeans are a 28. When I fart, the Reeboks blow off.

Steve Kluger

#7. If I weren't so depressed, I'd kill myself.

Steve Kluger

#8. Oh, no. This has "marriage" written all over it. Travis, read my lips: remember that Fellini film with the prostitute who says that every new sunrise makes her a virgin? It doesn't work that way with me. Even the sun thinks I'm a slut.

Steve Kluger

#9. Say 'Kenmore Square'," I insist. "Kenmaw Sqway-ah." "Say 'Nothing could be finer than to be in Carolina.'" "Nothing could be finah than to be in Caroliner.'" "You're doing that on purpose." "I'm not. I sway-ah.

Steve Kluger

#10. Romance is a universally unspoken language understood by all living organism on this planet except heterosexual men.

Steve Kluger

#11. Ale Perez What happened to your right hand?
TCKeller hucky made me finger-spell supercalifragilisticexpialidocious untill he got it right. it took an hour and a half. i still can't hold a fork. what's the favour.

Steve Kluger

#12. Augie: Does everybody else know?
T.C.: About my epitaph?
Augie: About me being gay, you gink-head hoser-face!
T.C. Not everybody. There's a night watchman at a Dunkin Donuts just outside of Detroit. He doesn't know yet.

Steve Kluger

#13. A first kiss after five months means more than a first kiss after five minutes.

Steve Kluger

#14. It's a lot easier to patch things up with somebody when he doesn't even know you were pissed off at him in the first place.

Steve Kluger

#15. Never, ever stop believing in magic, no matter how old you get. Because if you keep looking long enough and don't give up, sooner or later you're going to find Mary Poppins.

Steve Kluger

#16. And if Henry Higgins is not the most reprehensible character ever written for the stage, that's only because somewhere, somehow, someone is composing a musical biography of Ronald Reagan

Steve Kluger

#17. Mr. Herbert Demarest
Alexander Hamilton Jr. High
2236 Bedford Avenue
Brooklyn NY
Dear Mr Demarest,
Then why don't you give him 'Withering Heights'? At least Heathcoat knew how to kick some ass.
Chas. Banks
3d Base

Steve Kluger

#18. After you've spent four years kissing somebody's perineum, the subtext talks louder than words.

Steve Kluger

#19. Just because you discover that you may like somebody after all, it doesn't necessarily mean there's any attraction.

Steve Kluger

#20. It would have served me right if I'd had a cerebral aneurysm on the spot. Instead, I forgot all about my foot
until we shoved the flat onto the stage. I think we broke my ankle. This is bullshit. I have finals to worry about.

Steve Kluger

#21. The only thing I know about Moses is him coming down from the mountain with the commandments and saying 'The good news is I got him down to 10. The bad news is adultery is still in.

Steve Kluger

#22. Ale: Are you manipulating me again? T.C.: Try not to fall for it. I dare you.

Steve Kluger

#23. T.C.: Um, actually you just said "I live in a parking lot." You didn't mean to do that.
Lori: You've never seen traffic on Concord Street at eight o'clock in the morning.

Steve Kluger

#24. You got a boyfriend or something?"
I hate it when he figures me out before I have a chance to do it myself.
Especially when I've been counting on at least seven more years of denial.

Steve Kluger

#25. We make families of our own, Travis whispered in my arms on the last night we spent together. It starts with you and me and then it spreads. And whatever happens, there'll always be a part of me that's part of you. No matter what.

Steve Kluger

#26. TRAVIS: I never said I like boys!
GORDO: Ever beat off to Penthouse?
TRAVIS: No.
GORDO: Ever collect baseball cards?
TRAVIS: No.
GORDO: How old is Barbra Streisand?
TRAVIS: 36. Three weeks ago.
GORDO:What do you need - a fucking blueprint?

Steve Kluger

#27. What do you mean Taurus? he frowns. I'm not a Taurus.

You were born on the cusp, I remind him. Jason merely shrugs.

Shows what you know, Scotty, I was born in Ohio.

I can take him anywhere but out.

Steve Kluger

#28. Here's to us. Who's like us? Damn few.

Steve Kluger

#29. Communicating with the federal government is like talking to a computer that's crashing.

Steve Kluger

#30. Falling hard for somebody makes you do things you never thought you'd do before. Like pulling off an A in History or finally facing the truth about yourself

Steve Kluger