Ray Palla Quotes

#1. Regaring Politics: You've got your cats on one side and your dogs on the other; someone has to walk the fence and feed the animals. - Kinky Friedman

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#2. You can't shave a cat with a shoe.

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#3. You, sir, are as twisted as a twelve-string banjo. - Willie Nelson to Sheriff Preston Bank

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#4. Why go to so much trouble when Cranberry Juice, Chicken Broth, and Vodka tastes just like Thanksgiving Dinner, and you can enjoy it alone.

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#5. Give little people a little power, and it goes straight to their ugly, little heads. -Foot talks about authority

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#6. My hands are way too big to text. I'd need short hand for my hands. -Foot to Pad

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#7. Just a nod, or a wink, a finger, or a thumb can have so many different meanings.

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#8. Nudist Colony Halloween parties are especially scary. They give the word "moon" a new cruel meaning.

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#9. Buzz Aldrin said something on the moon about a soft landing before 'stage-aware' Neil Armstrong said, "Houston, the Eagle has landed". People still argue about what the first words were on the moon.

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#10. We enjoy talking about music, politics, and subjugation. - Kinky Friedman to Night Rider on KOKE-FM

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#11. Seasickness in itself is not contagious, but I'm pretty sure that puking is extremely contagious.

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#12. A little holiday spirit lives forever in everyone. Test your own holiday spirit. Give away all of it you can. You'll see, it comes right back to you.

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#13. The word for the day is: legs - the phrase for the day is: Spread the word. - Major Mac Pecan

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#14. Never fry bacon naked.

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#15. Happy Valentine's... Let's wear costumes!

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#16. Put two idiot drivers together at a traffic light and you're gonna have a car wreck. - Pop - Krill America

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#17. Please sir, eat the nuts that are here for you. - Melamie Masters

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#18. If you run, you better be faster than my gun. -Weasel to illegal aliens

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#19. Just knock off the horns and hair, and toss it on the coals for about thirty seconds on each side. I like mine still kicking and quivering! -Wichita talking about steak

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#20. Time was unending when charmed, captivated, even delighted by the mystical motion of the ocean!

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#21. ...people shouldn't die for things they believe. There needs to be a better reason. Belief is so shallow.

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#22. Eyebrows and hair singed off, Hector is barely recognizable under a lathering of day-glow orange. He appears to have been tarred-and-feathered with orange tar and oatmeal feathers.

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#23. My name is Richard Werner. Dick. You can call me Dick.

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#24. I swear if Washington moved any slower, we could be at war and it would all be over before they could even lift their sluggish, naked, dead asses off of their comfortable heated-seat toilets. -Fitzhugh to Captain Jeeter

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#25. I guess it's a good thing that we don't know what we don't know; otherwise it would probably make a lot more of us a lot more insane.

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#26. If you're not changing, evolving with the times, there's a pretty good chance that you're stagnant, dying, already dead, or just a rock in someone's shoe.

Ray Palla