Marshall Thornton Quotes

#1. So are you doing anything for your anniversary? I mean other than sitting around your backyard with a bottle of wine moping over lost love."

Since those were pretty much my plans, I said,"No. I'm going to hire a masseur, like you suggested."
After that, there was no turning back. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#2. How's your love life?" I asked.
"What love life? You keep ruining it."
That was the answer I was hoping for. I even hoped it was true. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#3. So, Carter, if you need to talk about anything, you know, about being gay. If there are things that you don't understand or things that confuse you, you can ask me. Anything. You can ask me anything."
Carter studied him for a moment and asked. "Who's your cell provider? - Author: Marshall Thornton

#4. Don't call me Daddy unless you mean it."
"How do you know I don't mean it?"
"Because your clothes are on and your ass isn't in the air. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#5. One of the best ways to get promoted, besides sleeping with the right people, is to fail spectacularly. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#6. Actually having sex with a screenwriter typically led to a blockbuster. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#7. I'm not planning to do it again." Though to be honest he hadn't planned to do it in the first place. Which meant it could happen again without any planning at all. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#8. This was excitement, and desire, and pleasure. Nothing mattered while you were with a man. Nothing but the man, or men in this case.
This was freedom. This was forgetting. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#9. Have you learned nothing from me? There are other things to do with a man besides marry him."
He sighed heavily.
"Sometimes I think deep down inside you're a lesbian. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#10. Don't worry, I'll calm down by tonight when we go out. Provided you keep your clothes on all day and manage not to commit any felonies."
Praline mumbled a promise to do his best, though even he worried that it might not be possible. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#11. Vincent inhaled sharply and mumbled something like "oh my God". I wasn't sure what he was oh-my-God-ing about since he was still struggling to get my jeans open. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#12. Look," Jason said, "you really need to learn the difference between sex and a thank-you card. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#13. I found an online knife store. I'd rather go and pick one up so that I had it today, but then I noticed they had a category called. California Legal. Apparently, I lived in a state that had really solid knife control-but still allowed you to own a machine gun. Logical. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#14. We've fooled around. I guess he's kind of a fuck buddy."
"Fuck buddy?"
"Oh, you don't know that term? Well, it's a friend-"
"You don't have to explain. It's vividly self-explanatory. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#15. You don't really want to see the movie, do you?"
"I was enjoying it."
"You weren't paying any attention."
"That doesn't meant I wasn't enjoying myself. It's a comedy, right?"
"Sort of," he said. "The daughter gets cancer and dies. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#16. Then, Jason looked up and asked, "Do you realized that there are more words for penis in English language then there are for love?"
"I did not know that," Praline replied.
"Can we discuss it later? - Author: Marshall Thornton

#17. They are so good they can get serial killers before they even get started. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#18. You want to fuck me?" he asked.

"The thought crossed my mind," I replied honestly. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#19. I don't remember what I was saying, but I remember thinking I was incredibly smart and wishing I could always speak that clearly and cleverly. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#20. A virgin priest. His idea of what relationship with a man should be like was probably something out of a Harlequin romance-but with a sex change for the heroine. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#21. Part of him knew he shouldn't follow the young man. But another part had begun to stir in his pants. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#22. That was a very short conversation in which Tony had managed to lie to me, threaten me, and flirt with me. That took a lot of skill. My guess was they'd be promoting him soon. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#23. After you break up with a person, you begin to be honest about their more annoying habits. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#24. Though to be fair, "I live with my mother" is not the sexiest thing a man in his mid-forties can say. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#25. Martin's interest in the movie returned. Rydar pumped, Jax squirmed happily, and Martin added another dollop of Vaseline to his palm. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#26. People say love is the international language. I'd say jealousy and anger are also pretty articulate. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#27. Yeah, that's why I unbuckled my belt because I thought he could teach me about weights. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#28. That was the problem with most relationships, when they began you never know what they'd cost you. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#29. Fuck him with your thunder stick. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#30. Having sex with friends seems like a very good idea until suddenly it doesn't. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#31. People fall in love for stupid reasons. Why should the reasons to break up be that much better?" (Mac) - Author: Marshall Thornton

#32. A true homosexual would never turn down sex. The megapastor at his mama's church had given many a sermon about the immoral, wanton, and promiscuous behaviour of the gays. If the pastor had been wrong, well, Praline would be sorely disappointed. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#33. Celebrity spouse was exactly the arena he could excel in; it required good looks, red-carpet skills and unwavering enthusiasm(both public and private). He was totally qualified. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#34. I liked him I just didn't like complicated. And what could be more complicated that a priest? - Author: Marshall Thornton

#35. If you have nothing, you have nothing to lose. That's how I'd wanted my life to be. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#36. To be honest, it would be nice if love, and sex, and duty, and fidelity, all managed to happen at once, but for me they never seemed to line up. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#37. I probably needed to say something, some spiritual version of "Get the fuck out."
And I had no idea what that might be. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#38. Hey.How's it going?"
Martin always butched it up a little with his brother.
He tried to sound like a mechanic.
Why a mechanic?
Martin wasn't sure.
His own mechanic was gay, but he didn't sound gay.
Maybe that was what he was going for-gay but not gay. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#39. Not-Dave G. gave Praline a long stare, the kind of stare that telegraphed not just lust, but three or four possible sex acts. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#40. People do terrible things. You should never blame ideas. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#41. After we ordered dessert, Skye seemed to remember that conversation required a give and take, looked at me and said, "So...you're an accountant. Sounds painfully boring."
I wanted to say, "not as painfully boring as this conversation", but decided to take the high road. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#42. Getting fucked really isn't my thing."
"Well, thank you for faking it. You're a good actor. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#43. You know, I've always thought that we don't have enough words for love. Or maybe it's that we don't use the words we have. For instance, infatuation. No one ever says, 'I'm so infatuated.' Which, if you think about it is the first stage of a relationship. Infatuation. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#44. Ants are busy. They have too much to do to feel bad. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#45. Yes, the show must go on, but it's also important to survive until the curtain calls. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#46. He remembered a film called How to Murder Your Wife, but Martin couldn't think of any movie called How to Murder Your Nephew. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#47. I know what a sugar daddy is,"
Praline said indignantly.
"I grew up with cable TV. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#48. Yes, he was still relatively inexperienced, but he did know that long discussions of politically incorrect pejoratives in the middle of a blowjob weren't exactly, well, stimulating. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#49. It's depressing to be so depressed. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#50. We went to bed at a normal time, and then I woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of him fucking some guy!"

"Are you sure you're related? Can we get a DNA test? - Author: Marshall Thornton

#51. As he yanked the cushions off the sofa, the tube of Vaseline flew onto the floor. Both Carter and Martin stared at it for a moment, then Martin blushed, snatching it up. "I have dry skin. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#52. In fact, if more people had group sex the world would be a better place. Maybe there'd be less war and stuff. Okay, I knew I was high when that thought popped into my head. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#53. The good news is, he's trying to stop you, but he's not trying to kill you."
"Maybe I'll see that as good news tomorrow, but right now I'm a little too pissed off. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#54. These days Martin came across an increasing number of guys he wouldn't kick out of bed. As the years passed, out of necessity, his standards gradually lowered. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#55. He's in the mafia, you know."

Jan frowned. "Not everyone who's Italian is in the mafia."

"That may be true in Italy-but here there are hardly enough Italians to run a mafia. They have to belong. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#56. Logically, he understood air travel was completely possible.
Emotionally, he found the idea of an enormous, tremendously heavy metal object filled with people propelling itself through the sky for thousands of miles completely improbable. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#57. I suppose if I were looking for love in the eyes of every guy I fucked, I'd have been offended. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#58. Carter thought the Universe was a lot like God, except that the Universe didn't have a book telling you how to be and who to hate. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#59. I like a man who comes prepared. (Nick) - Author: Marshall Thornton

#60. Since I was pretty sure he was just an asshole and not a murdering asshole, I told him to suck my dick. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#61. I feel tricked. I've literally come back from the dead for you and you're not interested. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#62. Being a healthy broke person was better than being an unhealthy broke person. Besides, he needed to think. And to be honest, most of what he did at the gym was more like thinking than exercising. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#63. They all think I'm a queer now."
"I can't say I disagree with them."
"I'm not. I'm not queer."
I shrugged. "Okay, I believe you. But you might want to tell that to your cock. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#64. It always surprised me that on the right guy a layer of sweat was sexy as hell, and on the wrong guy it was disgusting. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#65. Some things were meaner if you said them calmly. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#66. I crossed my fingers. On both hands. Then my toes. I may have even crossed my eyes. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#67. Didn't having AIDS mean everyone had to always be nice to you? Except someone like Pastor Randy who actually seemed to hate people with AIDS even more than he hated regular gay people. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#68. If sexuality was a choice, we'd all have very clear memories of the day we chose. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#69. Politicians and low profiles rarely went together. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#70. So help me, Mac, if you manage to kill me I will ruin your eternity. You will be the most miserable man to live forever. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#71. Well it didn't make me happy to wake up and find you gawking at me like I was your own personal porno flick. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#72. As a film was little more than a ninety-six minute search for a condom, I had to wonder why anyone thought it wise to spend almost eighty million dollars producing it. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#73. He wore his hair in a way that suggested he'd just rolled out of bed after thrashing all night. In an earlier decade, your friends would have told you,"Man, your hair's a mess. Go fix it."
Now they say,"Whoa, dude, cool do. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#74. And he was not in any way, shape or form excited to meet me. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#75. N-O-W-A-C-K."
"No C."
"Oh. Okay. N-O-W-A-C. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#76. Will you be my slave?"
"No,"Praline said.
"But thank you for offering. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#77. She laughed. That didn't mean what he'd said was funny. It just mean they were still in that early phase of a romance, the part where you laughed, funny or not. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#78. I fell in love. Why can't I fall out of it?" He got a look on his face, which I knew meant he was making a mental note of that line too. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#79. I'm always careful," said Praline, and he was, though he had to admit it never made much difference. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#80. Hanson looked at me like I'd just claimed I could make a nuclear bomb out of laundry detergent, string, and a can of baked beans. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#81. These days you don't need a country to have a flag, you don't need to win an election to become president, and you don't need an enemy to have a war. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#82. Well, if we're done insulting each other I guess we can leave. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#83. It's just that there were times when he liked to keep his masturbatory routine old school. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#84. Please don't tell Juan."
"I don't work for Juan, I work for you."
"Oh thank God."
"As long as no one assassinates you with their tongue I've done my job. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#85. It was a bit dramatic. Even for me. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#86. The kid was cramping Martin's style. Martin's style was drama-free, peace, and quiet. It did not include slamming doors, difficult personal questions, or conversations with teenagers about sex. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#87. I gave him a weak smile. The thing was, I don't like him, or, at least, not much, but he was young and didn't really understand you didn't need to like someone to fuck them. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#88. My grief had become a thick scab; I picked at it from time to time, but mostly I left it alone. I didn't want to know what was underneath. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#89. He'd already identified me as a heathen, and I hoped he wouldn't try to change that. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#90. My heart beat fast, and I had a little trouble breathing. It felt like lust, but then again it might have been fear. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#91. In one of my plays, honestly I forget with one, I wrote that relationships only end in one of two ways: They end in divorce or they end in death. Ironically, death is the happier ending. (Mac) - Author: Marshall Thornton

#92. I hate it when you talk to God. He always agrees with you. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#93. Everyone lies. They lie to the people they love; they lie to themselves. Once you admit it, it's not such a hard thing to live with. What is hard to live with is how far people will go to keep their lies alive. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#94. He didn't intend to pay for anything. He just had to remember not to offer. Not offering to pay for things made it easier to not actually pay for them. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#95. Take your clothes off. Slowly," he told Carter.
So this is what romantic is, Carter thought. Kissing and watching each other strip. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#96. I'm not sure I should tell you. Not while you're alive, at least. Some things are better left for after death." (Mac) - Author: Marshall Thornton

#97. You don't know what you're missing."
I was thirty-four years old. I had a pretty good idea what I was missing. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#98. Nice people always make me want to do bad things. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#99. In his sixties and partially deaf, Jimmy came from some vague Middle East country. Periodically, during the Iraq war, he had gone door to door in the building explaining that he was not a Muslim, which convinced everyone in the building he was. - Author: Marshall Thornton

#100. I was staring down thirty-five in a few months. While I might have thought forty was old when I was her age, I'd since decided to move that particular goal post down the field to somewhere around sixty. And I reserved the right to make it even older if I survived the next ten years. - Author: Marshall Thornton