Jules Cassard Quotes

#1. Honey, what's the Detective doing here?"

"Tag, you never told me Wayne was so funny!"

"Wayne?"

"That's me. Most detectives also have first names.

Jules Cassard

#2. My mom always used to say, 'A watch pot never boils,' and I never knew if that really was something people used to say or if she just made it up, but I understood it either way.

Jules Cassard

#3. I suspect that many of the horror stories about jail are greatly exaggerated, but still, I wouldn't want to pass out in one.

Jules Cassard

#4. If you've only seen a dead body in a casket at a funeral, then you've never seen a real dead body. Believe me, I know, because recently I saw my first real dead body.

Jules Cassard

#5. To give away flowers you have to literally cut off their life supply: 'Here you go, it's pretty now but it's rapidly dying and will decompose before your eyes.' It's like giving someone a pet fish without the bowl.

Jules Cassard

#6. It's like my therapist says: 'Even hypochondriacs get sick for real sometimes.

Jules Cassard