Top 100 Charles M. Schulz Quotes

#1. It's your money or you'll be wearing cement shoes - Peppermint Patty

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #13638
#2. Security is a thumb and a blanket. Happiness is a warm puppy.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #32021
#3. Are you upset little friend? Have you been lying awake worrying? Well, don't worry ... I'm here. The flood waters will recede, the famine will end, the sun will shine tomorrow, and I will always be here to take care of you.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #84142
#4. No problem is too big to run away from.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #108988
#5. Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong'.
Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #110564
#6. There is no problem so big it cannot be run away from.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #137871
#7. For one brief moment victory was within our grasp!"
"And then the game started!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #148046
#8. Charlie Brown got hit with a line-drive!"
"Does anyone here know anything about first-aid?"
"It's probably not serious ... Second or third-aid will do.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #149170
#9. The rain washed away my pitcher's mound ... I'm a pitcher without a mound ... I'm a lost soul ... I'm like a politician out of office."
"Or a sailor without an ocean ... "
"Or a boy without a girl ...

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #166360
#10. You know, in a way, 'Dear Santa Claus' is rather stuffy ... Perhaps something a little more intimate would be better ... Something just a shade more friendly ... "
"How about 'Dear Fatty'?

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #183649
#11. Sometimes I ask myself questions... Sometimes I ask myself, is this your real life or is this just a pilot film? Is my life a thirty-nine week series or is it a special?"
"Whatever it is, your ratings are down... Five cents, please!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #212279
#12. There are three things I have learned never to discuss with people ... Religion, Politics, and The Great Pumpkin.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #242684
#13. Here I am flying high over enemy lines in my Sopwith Camel searching for the Red Baron. Who's that behind me? It's the Red Baron! He has me in his sights! Give my regards to Broadway.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #244471
#14. Do you think if two people liked the same thing, it could bring them closer together?"
"Certainly ... Take classical music, for instance ... Two people who shared a love for Beethoven could become very close ... "
"How about TV?

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #247304
#15. I think I know what's wrong with you ... Walk up onto that pitcher's mound ... Does your stomach hurt now?"
"Yes! Ow! Ooo! Yes!"
"All right, now come down off the mound ... There ... Has it stopped hurting?"
"Yes ... Yes, I think it has!"
"There's your trouble ... Five cents, please!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #253139
#16. May I ask a question, Lucy?"
"Go right ahead!"
"Just why do you want to draw this line all the way around the world?"
"Well, you know the old saying, Charlie Brown ... You have to draw the line someplace!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #262348
#17. Sometimes, when you walk by the home
of the girl you love, you can see her standing by the window ... She waves at you, and you wave back ... But it's her grandmother ...

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #265706
#18. A glacier will frequently move forward one foot while retreating three feet ... Which reminds me a lot of myself!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #301321
#19. One of Beethoven's favorite dishes was macaroni and cheese. The girl I marry must be able to make good macaroni and cheese ... "
"How did Beethoven feel about cold cereal?

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #331254
#20. In the book of life, the answers are not in the back!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #334786
#21. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, but it sure makes the rest of you lonely.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #337930
#22. That's the secret to life ... replace one worry with another.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #435815
#23. Humor is proof that everything is going to be all right with God nevertheless.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #451531
#24. Love is letting him win even though you know you could slaughter him.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #455342
#25. I love people; it's mankind I can't stand.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #458215
#26. Just remember, when you're over the hill, you begin to pick up speed.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #468063
#27. There's our excuse ... we'll blame everything on the round-headed kid!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #486994
#28. Dearest darling, how I love you. Words cannot tell how much I love you. So forget it.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #506435
#29. Never lie in bed at night asking yourself questions you can't answer.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #520492
#30. Charlie Brown says that we're put here on earth to make others happy."
"Is that why we're here? I guess I'd better start doing a better job ... I'd hate to be shipped back!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #525117
#31. Exercise is a dirty word. Every time I hear it I wash my mouth out with chocolate.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #539110
#32. Going to our school is an education in itself which is not to be confused with actually getting an education.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #562971
#33. Aren't the clouds beautiful? I could just lie here all day, and watch them drift by ...

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #569028
#34. Life is just too much for me. I've been confused right from the day I was born ... I think the whole trouble is that we're thrown into life too fast ... We're not really prepared ... "
"What did you want ... A chance to warm up first?

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #589723
#35. It doesn't matter what you believe just so long as you're sincere.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #600594
#36. What's the sense in having an eclipse if you can't look at it? Somebody in production sure slipped up this time!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #633575
#37. I had to go to the school nurse yesterday because my stomach hurt ... "
"You worry too much, Charlie Brown ... No wonder your stomach hurts ... You've got to stop all this silly worrying!"
"How do I stop?"
"That's your worry! Five cents, please!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #682162
#38. We all need someone to kiss us goodbye

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #692577
#39. Yesterday I was a dog. Today I'm a dog. Tomorrow I'll probably still be a dog. Sigh! There's so little hope for advancement.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #711967
#40. The way I see it, it doesn't matter what you believe just so you're sincere.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #730964
#41. I have a question. What if your advice doesn't help me? Do I get my money back?"
"No, because as soon as you pay me, I run right out and spend it. That's one of the first things they teach you in medical school!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #732198
#42. LINUS: Where are you going for Thanksgiving, Charlie Brown?
CHARLIE: My father, my mother, Sally, and I are all going to my grandmothers for dinner.
SALLY: Do you want to come too, Linus? We can hold hands under the table.
LINUS: BLECH!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #752660
#43. It's better to live one day as a lion than a dozen years as a sheep.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #756692
#44. Life is full of choices, but you never get any!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #778686
#45. Charlie Brown, Snoopy, Linus, Lucy ... How can I ever forget them ...

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #785046
#46. I feel sorry for little babies ... When a little baby is born into this cold world, he's confused! He's frightened! He needs something to cheer him up ... The way I see it, as soon as a baby is born, he should be issued a banjo!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #800137
#47. All right, team ... This is our first game of the season ... If we all show the right spirit, I think we can win this one. Let's try to encourage each other ... Let's hear a little chatter out there, okay?"
"YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL, KID!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #842957
#48. You can't survive by sucking the juice from a wet mitten.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #869464
#49. Wouldn't it be nice if our lives were like VCRs , and we could 'fast forward' through the crummy times?

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #880539
#50. Lucy: You learn more when you lose
Charlie Brown: Well then I must be the smartest person in world!!!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #905731
#51. What in the world is the matter with you?!"
"I'm a new feminist!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #914347
#52. Mr. Claus
c/o North Pole

Dear Joe...

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #922149
#53. Big sisters are the crab grass in the lawn of life.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #926249
#54. Bob Dylan will be thirty years old this month ... "
"That's the most depressing thing I've ever heard.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #945940
#55. The term that best describes me now is 'secular humanist.'

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #957413
#56. How can we lose when we're so sincere?

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1002249
#57. I have a feeling that this is going to be a good year."
"What makes you think so?"
"I don't know ... It just has all the appearances of a good year."
"Have you looked in all the corners?

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1005900
#58. Sometimes I lie awake at night thinking about all the dumb things I do every day ... If I live to be eighty and I do ten dumb things each day ... That would be about two hundred and ninety thousand dumb things ... When you add up all the dumb things you do, it's best to use round figures ...

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1126180
#59. Empty?! You took all the cookies!"
"They were crying to get out of the jar ... Cookies get claustrophobia too, you know!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1154667
#60. I just draw what I think is funny, and I hope other people think it is funny, too.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1170777
#61. Patty: I'll be the good guy.
Shermy: I'll be the bad guy.
Patty: What are you going to be, Charlie Brown?
Charlie Brown: I'll be sort of in-between; I'll be a hypocrite!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1178221
#62. If I were given the opportunity to present a gift to the next generation, it would be the ability for each individual to learn to laugh at himself.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1181811
#63. I think we can rule out 'mixed brain dominance' as a cause of your poor performance at school, Charlie Brown" "Have you ruled out stupidity?" "Peanuts", Charles M

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1197649
#64. I want to know about life! I want some real answers ... "
"Five."
"Five?!"
"I thought that was a pretty good answer!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1213634
#65. I'm dying and all I hear are insults!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1216686
#66. Cartooning is preaching. And I think we have a right to do some preaching. I hate shallow humor. I hate shallow religious humor, I hate shallow sports humor, I hate shallowness of any kind.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1225166
#67. Let's just say that life has me beaten ... So I give up! I admit there's no way I can win ... "
"What is it you want, Charlie Brown?"
"How about two out of three?

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1238279
#68. I used to have more tolerance for these views, but I am losing patience with what I see. The test of anything is the fruit it bears. I see no good fruit being born.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1268360
#69. A beep on the nose is a sign of great affection

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1292568
#70. The early bird gets the worm but the late bird doesn't even get the late worm.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1310342
#71. If you grit your teeth and show real determination, you'll always have a chance.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1320887
#72. Linus: What would you say you want most out of life, Charlie Brown? To be happy?
CB: Oh, no. I don't expect that. I really don't. I just don't want to be unhappy!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1345960
#73. Happiness is a sad song.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1351275
#74. Snowflakes fascinate me ... Millions of them falling gently to the ground ... And they say that no two of them are alike! Each one completely different from all the others ... The last of the rugged individualists!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1474809
#75. I know the answer! The answer lies within the heart of all mankind! The answer is twelve? I think I'm in the wrong building.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1487204
#76. Winning isn't everything, but losing isn't anything.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1525458
#77. Dear Valentine, I have thought of you often. Not all the time, but often.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1528301
#78. I have deep feelings of depression ... What can I do about this?'
'Snap out of it! Five cents, please.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1549804
#79. I come from a long line of generations!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1553415
#80. Nobody gave me what I wanted for my birthday! Nobody! What sort of presents do you call these? New shoes, a green sweater and a bunch of stupid toys!"
"What were you expecting?"
"Real estate!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1561819
#81. Snoopy didn't start off being a Beagle. It's just that 'beagle' is a funny word.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1586407
#82. a little offending never hurt anybody

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1592096
#83. Good afternoon ... My name is Lucy ... I'm going to be your right-fielder ... Our special today is a misjudged fly-ball. We also have a nice bobbled ground ball and an exellent late throw to the infield ... I'll be back in a moment to take your order.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1611242
#84. Decorate your home. It gives the illusion that your life is more interesting than it really is.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1654296
#85. Rats! Sometimes it's very difficult being a dog ... Especially when it's raining. You're looking forward to a great breakfast ... When it arrives, you're full of joyful anticipation ... Then you see the water rise in your dog dish ... And you watch your pancakes float downstream!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1667367
#86. I enjoy looking at your face ... Whenever I look at your face, a question always comes to my mind ... Will man ever succeed in reaching the moon?

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1667741
#87. Peppermint Patty's team is short a glove, so I'm walking over to lend them mine."
"You're kidding! Don't you think they're taking advantage of you?"
"No, I'm doing it because I want to do it."
"What are you, some kind of mystic?!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1681706
#88. Dear Valentine, I love you. Whoever you are.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1705427
#89. What's this? That little red-haired girl dropped her pencil ... Gee ... It's got teeth marks all over it ... She nibbles her pencil ... She's human!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1709810
#90. Why did you write "Charlie Brown is a blockhead" on the sidewalk?"
"Because I sincerely believe you are a blockhead! I have to write what I believe is true... It's my moral respolsibility!"
"Deep down I admire her integrity...

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1717082
#91. My life has no purpose, no direction, no aim, no meaning, and yet I'm happy. I can't figure it out. What am I doing right?

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1729795
#92. Stop worrying about the world ending today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1729837
#93. For a nothing, Charlie Brown, you're really something!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1742108
#94. Never give your heart to a blockhead.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1754008
#95. Sucking your thumb without a blanket is like eating a cone without ice cream!

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1806011
#96. All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1817313
#97. My grandfather has been very depressed lately. He just doesn't know what to do. He says it's late in the game, and he's afraid that life has him beaten."
"Tell him to take out the goalie.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1829328
#98. There's a difference between a philosophy and a bumper sticker.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1839202
#99. Be yourself. No one can say you're doing it wrong.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1868676
#100. My anxieties have anxieties.

Charles M. Schulz

Charles M. Schulz Quotes #1871714

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