Top 100 C.S. Pacat Quotes
#1. And with returning awareness, he saw as if for the first time the bodies of the men that he had killed to get to the Regent's decoy, and beyond that, the evidence of what he had done. The
C.S. Pacat
#2. Damianos," Touars said. "Princekiller."
It was the last thing he said. Damen
pulled the sword out. He took a step
back.
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#3. When Laurent turned to face him, his
eyes were dark. His lips were parted
uncertainly. He had lifted his hand to his
own shoulder, as though chasing a ghost
touch there. He did not look exactly
relaxed, but the movement did look a
little easier.
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#4. Damen felt it then, the first dizzy edge of new emotion, and he let go his hold of Laurent like a man fearing a precipice; and yet was helpless.
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#5. It was the earring. Laurent was always so austere. The earring reframed him. It gave the appearance of a sensual side, sophisticated and subtle.
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#6. Order whatever punishment you like, from the coward's distance of a chain-lenght. You and Govart are two of a kind.
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#7. This is close quarters.'
'Close enough to see your eyelashes,' said Damen.
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#8. You're still wearing it."
He couldn't help but say it. Laurent's wrist was heavy with gold, like the colour of his hair in the firelight.
"So are you."
"Tell me why."
"You know why," said Laurent.
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#9. I would court you, with all the grace and courtesy that you deserve,
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#10. I think if I gave you my heart, you would treat it tenderly.
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#11. How can you trust me, after what your own brother did to you?"
"Because he was false", said Damen, "and you are true. I have never known a truer man.
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#12. The Crown Prince was camped at Nesson this very minute, on his way to the border to stand up to Akielos. He was a young man serious about his responsibilities, Charls said. Damen had to make an effort not to look over at Laurent, gambling, when he said it.
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#13. He wasn't sure how it would be, but
when Laurent saw who was beside him,
he smiled, the expression a
little shy but completely genuine.
Damen, who hadn't been expecting it,
felt the single painful beat of his heart.
He'd never thought Laurent could look
like that at anyone.
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#14. Damen was smiling helplessly. 'that was adequate.' 'You've been waiting to say that.' The words were only a little blurred.
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#15. If it hurt it was fitting. It was simply kingship.
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#16. I'm not going to use the knife," said
Damen, "but if you're willing to put it in
my hand, you underestimate how much I
want to."
"No," said Laurent, "I know exactly what
it is to want to kill a man, and to wait.
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#17. Time unslid the knot of any last ribbon of tension.
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#18. A golden prince was easy to love if you did not have to watch him picking wings off flies.
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#19. I'm not sure that's quite what I asked,"
said Laurent. His voice had the same
quality as his gaze. "This is close
quarters."
"Close enough to see your eyelashes,"
said Damen. "It's lucky you do not have
the size to breed great warriors.
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#20. He was under no illusion that he was going to be taken to the campfire to roll around with Laurent. If anything, he was going to be taken to the campfire to watch Laurent do some inventive sidestepping.
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#21. By that time, Damen had received the tally of the dead: twelve hundred of us, six and a half thousand of them. He
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#22. Don't, said Laurent, toy with me. I - have not the means to defend against this.
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#23. I didn't send them after you,' said the cool, familiar voice. 'I sent them after the Regent's Guard, who were making enough racket to raise the dead, the drunk, and those without ears.
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#24. It's not naive to trust your family.'
'I promise you, it is,' said Laurent. 'But I wonder, is it less naive than the moments when I find myself trusting a stranger, my barbarian enemy, whom I do not treat gently.
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#25. I miss you too,' he said. 'I'm jealous of Isander.' 'Isander's a slave.' 'I was a slave.' The moment ached. Laurent met his gaze, his eyes too clear. 'You were never a slave, Damianos. You were born to rule, as I was.
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#26. He had the choice of the poor with no other way to survive, the choice of a child powerless to his elders, the choice of a man when his King gives him an order, which is no choice at all, and yet still more than is afforded to a slave.
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#27. He did remember being supported by two of the guards, here, in this room, while Radel stared at his back in horror. "The Prince really . . . did this?" "Who else?" Damen said. Radel
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#28. Is there anyone at this court who isn't my enemy?"
"Not if I can help it," Laurent said.
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#29. We could try some other arrangement."
"You're right: it should be me in front
and you carrying the horse.
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#30. If someone kills your family you don't rest until they are dead.
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#31. Laurent said, 'No. I'm not here to - ' He said, 'I'm just here.
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#33. There was a warmth in his chest whenever he looked at Laurent. He didn't look often for that reason.
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#34. I miss you," said Laurent. "I miss our conversations.
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#35. He knew that he was vulnerable to her in this state, that her expertise, like Laurent's, was in finding weakness and pressing down. He looked over at Laurent and said, flatly, 'Deal with it.' Laurent
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#36. It was like watching a man smile as he surrendered himself to drown in deep water.
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#37. Then, in the spirit of benevolence, "Your face is well balanced." She slapped him encouragingly on the back, "You have very long eyelashes. Like a cow.
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#38. Don't think, he'd said, because it was easier than saying, Take me for who I am.
He couldn't bear that suddenly. He wanted it without pretences, without excuses, his fingers curling hard into Laurent's hair.
'It's me,' said Damen. 'It's me, here with you. Say my name.'
'Damianos.
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#39. After a long moment, Laurent said, I'm going to need some help standing up.
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#40. My scorn and contempt,' said Laurent, 'are not in need of your leniency. Lord Touars, you face me in my own kingdom, you inhabit my lands, and you breathe at my pleasure. Make your own choice.
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#41. By this time, the camp was cleared, and the newly pitched tents looked like softly glowing globes, the light from lamps inside turning the tent skins to warm gold.
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#42. Laurent had stopped dead the moment he had seen Damen, his face turning white as though in reaction to a slap, or an insult.
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#43. All bad things were done in the dark.
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#44. Stay with me until this thing is done, and I will take off the cuffs and the collar. I will release you willingly. We can face each other as free men. Whatever is to fall out between us can do so then.
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#45. Reporting to Jord, Damen found himself caught in a conversation that he wasn't ready for. 'I could tell from your face. You didn't know he could fight.' 'No,' said Damen. 'I didn't.' 'It's in his blood.' 'The Regent's men seemed just as surprised as I was.' 'He's private about it.
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#46. Lamen though of modest origins was a thoughtful young man who spoke Veretian very well, even if his knowledge of cloth was lacking. 'I
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#47. Men find themselves in the places they put themselves
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#48. Think he'll kill him? another
speculated.
Damen knew the answer to that question.
Laurent was not going to kill him. He
was going to break him.
Here, in front of everyone.
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#49. As the heavy latticed iron beetled above
their heads, Damen found himself
wanting it, wanting disruption, a cry of
outrage, or of challenge, wanting it as a
release to this
feeling. Traitor. Stop.
But none came.
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#50. Laurent was a nest of scorpions in the body of one person.
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#51. It's not a trick,' said Laurent. 'You'd let me go,' said Damen. This time it was Laurent who was silent, gazing back at him. Damen said, 'And - until then?' 'Until then, you are my slave, and I am your Prince, and that is how it is between us.
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#52. Last night, in the evening darkness of the tent, he had pulled this gift from his packs and looked down at it, feeling its weight in his hands. Once or twice before, he had thought about this moment. In his most private thoughts, he'd imagined it happening with the two of them alone together.
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#53. He wondered what commands the Regent would have given to Govart. Do as you please and don't listen to my nephew. He thought, probably something exactly like that.
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#54. Damen now knew the precise number of arrows Laurent needed to have trained on him in order to shut him up. It was six.
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#55. Not everyone could have the blissful equanimity of Lamen, who seemed to pay the Prince no deference of rank, a piece of very good acting. Charls
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#56. Contrary, aren't you,' said Damen softly, thumbing over Laurent's cheek.
'Fuck me,' said Laurent.
'I want to,' said Damen. 'Can you let me?
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#57. I don't know. I don't know why. I don't know what I did to make him hate me as much as this. Why we couldn't go as brothers to mourn - - our father - 'You
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#58. From the severe, straight-backed posture to the impersonal grace of his cupped yellow head; from his detached blue eyes to the arrogance of his cheekbones, Laurent was complicated and contradictory, and Damen could look nowhere else.
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#59. You have Charcy. I have Fortaine. He stared at the words, written in familiar, unmistakable handwriting. I'll receive you at my fort. *
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#60. Stay back, old man. It isn't your business. This is the Prince of Vere.'
'But
I only paid three coppers for him,' said Volo, sounding confused.
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#61. You remind me of him. He was the best man I have ever known.
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#62. You wrestled him without any clothes on.'
'That is sports,
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#63. Perhaps if you were not a foot taller, or quite so broad across the shoulders.'
'It's considerably less than a foot,' said Damen.
'Is it?' said Laurent. 'It feels like more when you argue with me on points of honour.
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#64. If you served the King,' said Damen, 'how is it you now find yourself in the Prince's household, and not his uncle's?' 'Men find themselves in the places they put themselves,' Paschal said, closing his satchel with a snap.
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#65. The Veretian palace, afroth with ornament, paid only lip service to defence. The parapets were purposeless curving decorative spires. The slippery domes that he skirted would be a nightmare in an attack, hiding one part of the roof from the other.
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#66. I'll stay,' said Damen. 'You know I'll stay for as long as you - ' 'Don't,' said Laurent. 'Don't lie to me. Not you.' 'I'll stay,' said Damen. 'Three days. After that, I ride south.' Laurent
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#67. Congratulations,' said Damen. 'You've forced my hand. You have what you want. Delpha, in exchange for your aid in the south. Nothing given freely, nothing done out of feeling, everything coerced, with bloodless planning.' 'Then I have your agreement? Say it.' 'You have my agreement.' 'Good,
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#68. It's me,' said Damen. 'It's me, here with you. Say my name.' 'Damianos.' He
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#69. It was an impressive fight.'
'Yes, I know,' said Laurent.
He didn't smile when he said things like that.
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#70. My honourable barbarian. I wouldn't have picked that as your type.' 'Type?' 'A pretty face, a devious mind and a ruthless nature.' 'No. That isn't - I didn't know she was . . . I didn't know what she was.' 'Didn't you?' said Laurent. 'Perhaps I . . . I knew she was ruled by her mind, not her heart.
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#71. You spent the night in the Prince of Vere's rooms.' 'I spent ten minutes in his rooms. If you think I fucked him in that time you underrate me.' Nikandros didn't move his horse out of the way.
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#72. Coiled and personal, Laurent's gift was a Veretian whip, made of gold.
Damen recognized it.
[ ... ]
His gaze flung to Laurent. He knew he had flushed, he could feel the heat in his own cheeks. In front of the gathered generals, he couldn't say, What have you done?
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#73. To take off the collar required a blacksmith. He
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#74. So he's tame,' said Estienne, and reached out tentatively, as though to pat a wild animal.
It was a question of which part of the animal he was patting. Damen cknocked his hand away. Estienne gave a yelp and snatched his hand back, nursing it against his chest.
'No that tame,' said Laurent.
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#75. The doors closed, behind him; he turned,
and saw Laurent.
His stomach dropped, a moment of
confused shock
he'd never expected to
see Laurent here.
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#76. Something to say?' said Laurent
Jord was holding off from them. The same stubborn distaste was in his voice. 'Not with him here.'
'He's your Captain,' said Laurent.
'He knows well enough he should go.'
'While we compare notes on spreading for the enemy?' said Laurent.
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#77. Laurent said, 'If Jord wants to get down on his knees for Aimeric, he should know exactly who he's crawling for.' *
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#78. He is a prize," said Torveld warmly. "I'll wager you never thought a prince could be jealous of a slave. Right now I would exchange places with you in a heartbeat." You
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#79. Rumours of Damen's enslavement in Vere had spread like fire through the camp. To see the Veretian Prince wear the gold cuff of a palace bed slave in turn was shocking, intimate, a symbol of Damen's ownership. Damen
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#80. He found himself looking down at Laurent, his eyes passing slowly over the delicate skin, the lamp-darkened blue eyes, the elegant curve of cheekbone, interrupted by a stray strand of blond hair.
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#81. If you are concerned that my memory for wrongs against me is longer than ten months,' said Laurent, 'there's no need for anxiety. I am sure you can persuade me you were genuinely mistaken.
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#82. He felt a throb of happiness, and said nothing, just lay on his back and looked up at the stars.
"It's like old times," said Damen, though the truth was, he had never really had times like this.
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#83. The collar came first, and when Guerin drew it from his neck he felt the collar's absence like a lightness, his spine unfurling, his shoulders settling.
Like a lie, cracking and dropping from him.
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#84. Having made the decision to let Damen in, Laurent had not gone back on it. When the walls went up, it was with Damen inside them. But
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#85. Why? Do you want to spar? We can
keep it friendly," Damen said.
"No," said Laurent.
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#86. Then Laurent turned and saw him, and
the pressure in his chest grew like pain
as Laurent greeted him, half stripped and
bright-eyed.
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#87. Damen held himself very still. This easy way of speaking of Auguste was new, and he didn't want to disturb it.
After a moment, Laurent said, 'He would have liked you.'
'Even after I started courting his little brother?' said Damen carefully.
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#88. He'd been kissing Laurent and that should not be interrupted. His eyes returned warmly, possessively to their object: Laurent looked like any young
man who has been pressed against a battlement and kissed. The slight disturbance of the hair at Laurent's nape was wonderful.
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#89. Now, Laurent was beside him. Aloof, untouchable Laurent was beside him, kneeling on the wet marble hundreds of miles from home, with nothing in his eyes but Damen.
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#90. He said, 'Is there a child?' 'I have told you that there is,' said Jokaste. 'I wasn't talking to you,' said Damen. The attending women seated around Jokaste were of varying ages, from the eldest of perhaps sixty to the youngest, Jokaste's age, around twenty-four.
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#91. You put Govart,' said Damen, 'in a cell with Laurent?' 'Yes.' Guion spread his hands.
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#92. That's right, I'm still captured,' said Damen.
'Your eyes say, "For now,"' Laurent said. 'Your eyes have always said, "For now.
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#94. Damen tore off a piece of the bread, and then he looked at the men by the fire, and then he looked at Damen, a long, cool look that would have been difficult to hold if Damen had not had, by now, a great deal of practice.
And then he said, 'All right.
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#95. I can't protect you as I am now, Laurent had said. Damen hadn't thought about what protection might entail, but he would never have imagined that Laurent would step into the ring on his behalf. And stay in it. "I
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#96. I want you to know,' said Damen, carefully, 'that I haven't done anything to encourage the idea that I-that you and I-'
'If I thought you had, I'd have had you tied to a post and flogged until your front matched your back.
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#97. You see?" said Laurent. "He has forgiven me for the small matter of the whip. I have forgiven him for the small matter of killing my brother. All hail the alliance.
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#98. Can you stand? We need to move out. It's not safe for you here. Too many people want to kill you.'
After a moment, Laurent said, 'Everyone to the south, but only half the people to the north.
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#99. That is the man you face. He has more honour and integrity than any man I have ever met. He is dedicated to his people and his country. And I am proud to have been his lover.
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#100. Nephew. you were not invited to these discussions.'
'And yet, here I am. It's very irritating, isn't it?' Said Laurent.
C.S. Pacat
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