Beverly Engel Quotes

#1. Instead of envying what others have, decide what YOU want out of life and focus on achieving it.

Beverly Engel

#2. Positive and powerful: Sometimes people won't like me, and it's okay. Positive and powerful: I like me, and that's all that matters. Positive and powerful: It's more important what I think of me than what someone else thinks of me.

Beverly Engel

#3. Let others know when they have hurt or angered you. By not speaking up when someone insults or mistreats you, you are inadvertently giving permission for him or her to continue to treat you in the same way in the future.

Beverly Engel

#4. Apology reminds us that each person (including ourselves) deserves to be respected and treated fairly.

Beverly Engel

#5. There are many types of emotional abuse but most is done in an attempt to control or subjugate another person. Emotional abuse is like brainwashing in that it systematically wears away at the victim's self-confidence, sense of self, trust in her perceptions and self-concept.

Beverly Engel

#6. Emotional abuse is any type of abuse that is not physical in nature. It can include everything from verbal abuse to the silent treatment, domination to subtle manipulation.

Beverly Engel

#7. You have the right to your own ideas and opinions, to make your own decisions, and to have things go your way at times. Stand up for those rights.

Beverly Engel

#8. It is far more important to know myself and take care of myself than it is to look good to others.

Beverly Engel

#9. What other people think of us usually has very little to do with who we are. It has a lot more to do with the other individuals' issues-their prejudices, their fears, and projections. So it is a waste of time to constantly try to impress or please others.

Beverly Engel

#10. Nice Girl Syndrome: Nice girls suffer from "the disease to please" - they put their needs behind everyone else's.

Beverly Engel

#11. Many neglected and abused children grow up to be adults who are afraid to take risks of striking out on their own. Many will remain dependent on their abusive parents and unable to separate from them. Others leave their abusive parents only to attach themselves to a partner who is controlling.

Beverly Engel

#12. Children who feel unloved and unprotected are like a half-filled cup. They become incapable of 'filling up' because they have come to believe they are unworthy of love. They try to please others, give to others, and care for others in a desperate hope that they may make themselves worthy.

Beverly Engel

#13. Accepting that your imperfections and so-called negative attributes are part of what makes you unique will help you to stop continually trying to be someone or something that you are not.

Beverly Engel

#14. The more you face the truth, the angrier you will probably become. You have a right to be angry about being sexually abused. You have a right to be angry with the perpetrator, regardless of who it was, how long ago the sexual abuse occurred, or how much he/she has changed.

Beverly Engel