Alex Adams Quotes

#1. My two best friends are dead, which means they're great listeners now, but lousy as far as support goes.

Alex Adams

#2. Thank God.
Yeah, God. That guy.

Alex Adams

#3. Why don't you tell me why you called me?
Don't you know?
I'm a therapist, nto a psychic.
That would make your job easier, no?
Scarier.

Alex Adams

#4. I don't want him to think I'm crazy, because I'm not. Desperate is what I am. Quietly desperate and insatiably curious.

Alex Adams

#5. Can I ask you something?
Boxers. Briefs exacerbate my claustrophobia.

Alex Adams

#6. Just a cold. And I think maybe I'm pregnant, because I'm always riding the porcelain bus, or thinking about it.

Alex Adams

#7. Fuck you. Fuck you with a chainsaw!

Alex Adams

#8. Pa-rump, pa-rump, pa-rump. He's the Little Drummer Boy on speed.

Alex Adams

#9. You're on a blind date. The only other questions is: Why aren't you drinking heavily?

Alex Adams

#10. My sister's voice is Minnie Mouse and a dash of fingernails down a chalkboard, but only when she wants to bend me to her will.

Alex Adams

#11. A crude puppet impaled by her puppet master.

Alex Adams

#12. I have two choices: attend my sister's dinner party or tie a plastic sack around my mother's head until she runs out of ngagging. I choose the evil that doesn't come witha felony conviction.

Alex Adams

#13. Have you ever been in love?
Yes.
What's it like?
Great and terrible. Like Oz.

Alex Adams

#14. It's not just college grades that fall in a curve. Human decency is bell-shaped, with some of us slopping over the edges. Saints on one end, sinners on the other.

Alex Adams

#15. I pray to a God I don't really have faith in just so I feel like I have company.

Alex Adams

#16. When I awake, the world is still gone.

Alex Adams

#17. Do you realize you're talking to yourself?
Yes.
It's good that you know the difference.

Alex Adams

#18. Please don't' ask me how I feel about it. If I had to pick a word, I'd say homicidal.

Alex Adams

#19. I've heard the story about the woman who opened the box and let havoc grab a choke hold on the world.

Alex Adams

#20. He reels me in, cups my face with both hands, and becomes my whole world. This is a kiss
maybe the last one we'll ever know, so we stay there forever, warm and safe. When he pulls away, something is lost. I think it's my heart.

Alex Adams

#21. Detach or go crazy.

Alex Adams

#22. Do you want me, too?
Yes. And no.
I'll take that. For now.

Alex Adams

#23. Just say the word and I'll make him stay.
I have to do it.
There's no have to. Not even now.

Alex Adams

#24. Our new intern sorts pot shards like some kind of savant. The other interns call himi Rain Man.

Alex Adams

#25. Worst case I'll bring Rain Man here. I'll tell him it's a date.
Aha, so he's cute, then?
Tasty. And smart. Can't beat that witha stick.

Alex Adams

#26. If you kill him, call me. I'm bound by doctor client privilege.
Really?
No, but the courts make exceptions for assholes.

Alex Adams

#27. How do you file a restraining order against sadness?

Alex Adams

#28. It's satisfying. It yields immediate results. Something is dirty. Then it's not.

Alex Adams

#29. Are you menstruating?
what?
You're angry. Women are often angry when they menstruate. It is the hormones.

Alex Adams

#30. Five years, my family thinks it's time I moved on. I'd like to move on with a non-asshole

Alex Adams

#31. Just so we're clear, I dont' secretly want to have sex with either of my parents.
Me either. I worked through that in college just to make sure. It was touch and go for a while, especially when my father kept asking me if he looked pretty.

Alex Adams

#32. You're not dead.
I'm not dead.
Why? How?
Dying wasn't on my list.

Alex Adams

#33. One way, our way policy.

Alex Adams

#34. You want something to drink?
Is this a trick question?
Yes. I'm going to read your personality based on your beverage choices, so choose wisely.

Alex Adams

#35. And while I tell him all my thoughts, I don't always share my secrets.

Alex Adams

#36. They rushed in like sickle cells forced through a vein.

Alex Adams

#37. If the world ends tomorrow, understand that I regret saying no.

Alex Adams

#38. Otherwise I'll do something that I won't be able to live with. And that's important to me, being able to live with my actions. My thoughts are a different story. They've my own and they don't hurt anyone but me.

Alex Adams

#39. It's old. Really old.
Is that a technical term?
Yeah, it's technical. Translation: I don't know how old it is, but it's really fucking old.
Wow. That is old.

Alex Adams

#40. She's unhurt - or at least not bleeding on the oustide.

Alex Adams

#41. I think my invisibility cloak just failed.

Alex Adams

#42. You'll love him. Or maybe you'll just love him a time or two.

Alex Adams

#43. Love fills all the gaps in our souls.

Alex Adams