Uncle Vernon Quotes

#1. You can't give a Dementor the old one-two!

J.K. Rowling

#2. The fridge had been emptied of all Dudley's favorite things - fizzy drinks and cakes, chocolate bars and burgers - and filled instead with fruit and vegetables and the sorts of things that Uncle Vernon called rabbit food.

J.K. Rowling

#3. Uncle Vernon made another funny noise, like a mouse being trodden on.

J.K. Rowling

#4. And do I look like the kind of man that can be intimidated?" barked Uncle Vernon.
"Well ... " said Moody, pushing back his bowler hat to reveal his sinisterly revolving eye. Uncle Vernon lept backward in horror and collided painfully with a luggage trolley. "Yes, I'd have to say you do, Dursley.

J.K. Rowling

#5. Uncle Vernon went off to the lumpy bed next door, and Harry was left

J.K. Rowling

#6. Daddy's gone mad, hasn't he?

J.K. Rowling

#7. Amherst was pivotal in my broad intellectual development; MIT in my development as a professional economist.

Joseph Stiglitz

#8. The single best thing that has happened in my lifetime in music, after punk rock, is being able to share music, globally for free,

Steve Albini

#9. Dumbledore raised his finger for silence, a silence which fell as though he had struck Uncle Vernon dumb.

J.K. Rowling

#10. Criticism can be wonderful, especially in making connections in an interpretive way. But by applying theories randomly, it's an interesting exercise, but I don't think it illuminates the literature.

T.C. Boyle

#11. They run off eckeltricity, do they?" he said knowledgeably. "Ah yes, I can see the plugs. I collect plugs," he added to Uncle Vernon. "And batteries. Got a large collection of batteries.

J.K. Rowling

#12. Do I look stupid? snarled Uncle Vernon, a bit of fried egg dangling from his bushy mustache.

J.K. Rowling

#13. Some bloke came up to me in Tesco a couple of years ago at 11:30 pm and said: 'Excuse me, would you mind telling my son here that you're Uncle Vernon?' I said: 'Get a grip. It's 11:30 at night - what's he doing out of bed? I'm not here to entertain people at this time of night.

Richard Griffiths

#14. Uncle Vernon: What were you doing under our window, boy?
Harry Potter: Listening to the news.
Uncle Vernon: Listening to the news! Again?
Harry: Well, it changes every day, you see.

J.K. Rowling

#15. He thought it was a bit rich of Uncle Vernon to call anyone "dumpy," when his own son, Dudley, had finally achieved what he'd been threatening to do since the age of three, and become wider than he was tall.

J.K. Rowling

#16. Mae West: "You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough." Wish I could believe her.
So many possibilities in life and so little time!

Judith Somborac

#17. Uncle Vernon's face worked furiously. The idea of being taught consideration by a man who had just blasted away half his living-room wall seemed to be causing him intense suffering.

J.K. Rowling

#18. Aspasia and Xantippe in one. I

Henryk Sienkiewicz

#19. They heard the click of the mail slot and flop of letters on the doormat.
"Get the mail, Dudley," said Uncle Vernon from behind his paper.
"Make Harry get it."
"Get the mail, Harry."
"Make Dudley get it."
"Poke him with your Smelting stick, Dudley.

J.K. Rowling

#20. Are you threatening me, sir?" he said, so loudly that passersby actually turned to stare. "Yes, I am," said Mad-Eye, who seemed rather pleased that Uncle Vernon had grasped this fact so quickly.

J.K. Rowling

#21. Because a person chooses to leave their home country and come to the United States does not necessarily mean they have the right to demand that their father or their other extended family members be allowed to come if they don't otherwise meet the standard.

Jeff Sessions

#22. Teagan: How long has it been since you read a book that didn't havevampires in it?
Abby: They write books with no vampires? Wait ... the penguins made us read that Shakesrear guy, right?
Teagan: Shakespeare.

Kersten Hamilton

#23. Uncle Vernon cleared his throat importantly and said, "Now, as we all know, today is a very important day." Harry looked up, hardly daring to believe it.

J.K. Rowling

#24. Yeh don' know what yeh are?" he said finally. Uncle Vernon suddenly found his voice. "Stop!" he commanded. "Stop right there, sir! I forbid you to tell the boy anything!

J.K. Rowling

#25. It will help erase the idea that politics is a second-rate profession and a dirty business.

Robert Kennedy

#26. Oh, these people's minds work in strange ways, Petunia, they're not like you and me, said Uncle Vernon, trying to knock in a nail with the piece of fruitcake Aunt Petunia had just brought him.

J.K. Rowling

#27. I AM NOT PAYING FOR SOME CRACKPOT OLD FOOL TO TEACH HIM MAGIC TRICKS!" yelled Uncle Vernon. Hagrid seized his pink umbrella and whirled it over his head "NEVER -" he thundered "- INSULT -ALBUS -DUMBLEDORE - IN - FRONT - OF - ME!

J.K. Rowling

#28. Ministry of magic?' bellowed Uncle Vernon. 'People like you in government? Oh this explains everything, everything, no wonder the country's going to the dogs ...

J.K. Rowling