Tom Upton Quotes

#1. I don't believe it! You're still interested in the girl, despite the fact that she might be some kind of alien. Does this sickness of yours have any bounds?

Tom Upton

#2. Some people are born to weirdness," Jerry said, "and others have weirdness thrust upon them.

Tom Upton

#3. All I did was offer to kill your dog, and the next thing I know I'm being judged.

Tom Upton

#4. You know, my main goal in life is trying not to end up in a straightjacket.

Tom Upton

#5. UNDERTAKER!" the head boomed. "BOY, DO I HAVE A JOB FOR YOU!

Tom Upton

#6. We're here to take over the world
that's why we're starting here in Hamilton, Indiana
the nerve center of the entire planet.

Tom Upton

#7. You have to figure that there is something seriously wrong with somebody who wants to enter a profession that deals with whether people are screwing enough. Dealing with spirits, spooks, and demons almost seemed normal.

Tom Upton

#8. An idiot will do anything, no matter how stupid, because he is afraid of what everybody will think of him if he does nothing. A genius, on the other hand, is content to do nothing, no matter what people think, if he can't find anything worth doing.

Tom Upton

#9. I really should come with a warning label.

Tom Upton

#10. If you just go with the flow, no matter what weird things happen along the way, you always end up exactly where you belong.

Tom Upton

#11. Maybe anything that anybody ever has is for now. What happened before is gone, and what will happen later is an illusion.

Tom Upton

#12. Librarians are notorious snitches - don't let anybody convince you otherwise.

Tom Upton

#13. "Well
I don't know
the cops might not respond too well to you looking through their windows with a telescope."

Tom Upton

#14. It was at this time that I formed one of my own insights: it was strange how intelligent people, like Raffles, without being asked, freely spout off their insights and actually expect less intelligent people, like me, to be interested.

Tom Upton

#15. I just love things that serve a duel purpose.

Tom Upton

#16. I've always found wildlife very calming
except when animals are eating each other, of course.

Tom Upton

#17. Other than the voices in my head, I think I'm pretty normal.

Tom Upton

#18. Poor kid
all she'd wanted to do was get her teeth fixed.

Tom Upton

#19. I figured it is always better to be unpopular by your own choice.

Tom Upton

#20. Who in their right mind counts the tiles on the floor when they go visiting a neighbor?

Tom Upton

#21. It wasn't human nature to leave things alone. It was normal for people to try to fix things that didn't need to be fixed; or, infinitely worse, trying to fix things that were broken, because some things are meant to be broken

Tom Upton

#22. Your dad and I have been talking."
"You need to stop that. The marriage will last longer.

Tom Upton

#23. Never believe what they say; they always lie. I have a saying: Whatever they say, do the opposite, and you'll never go wrong.

Tom Upton

#24. You can't believe in fate only when it sends you something you want, only when things turn out right. You have to accept what fate sends you or doesn't send you, no matter whether or not you like it.

Tom Upton

#25. Life is much simpler if you don't notice anything ...

Tom Upton

#26. Do you realize how hard it is to keep your mind clear when somebody's telling you to keep your mind clear?

Tom Upton

#27. It is not easy being trapped in a school that is caught between cornfields and cows.

Tom Upton

#28. If everything is perfect, nobody has to say a word.

Tom Upton

#29. I have never been reduced to begging somebody to leave me alone, but in your case I'll make an exception.

Tom Upton

#30. Every time there was an unspoken promise that this would be the last time, but it would only be the last time until the next time.

Tom Upton

#31. It's pretty simple, really: having fun can only led to having more fun
it cannot led to injury, pain, or dismemberment.

Tom Upton

#32. Apparently I couldn't even pretend to be normal.

Tom Upton