Top 100 Stern'st Quotes
#1. There's a fine mascara line between genius and insanity
Josh Stern
#2. When it comes to relationships, I find it best to have two feet out the door
Josh Stern
#3. Howard Stern was the only one that was able to get through to me.
Jessica Hahn
#4. Playing a concerto with Zubin is like being surrounded by a well-loved, cashmere-lined silk glove.
Isaac Stern
#5. We think of mortality so little these days ...
I thought of the stern Victorian determination to keep death in mind, the uncompromising tombstones.
Remember, pilgrim, as you pass by,
As you are now so once was I:
As I am so will you be ...
Tana French
#6. So the fact that the first movie about Steve Jobs was made by a guy who was completely entrepreneurial and outside the film industry, I think is very appropriate.
Joshua Michael Stern
#7. In my day, when you called on a girl, her mother was always hollering down to see if she was still unraped, the maid would look in, her father would shuffle his feet in another room. Today the boy calls up, says, 'Meet you at the back door of Stern's.'
Frank Crowninshield
#8. My life is fairly normal. I didn't wake up one morning and find out that I'm suddenly a star, with people clamoring at me. I feel like I'm moving up the ladder just a little, which is fine.
Daniel Stern
#10. Right away, I invited on guests like Steve Wozniak, John Draper, and even porn star Danni Ashe, who took her top off in the studio to show us all how hot she was. (Listen up, Howard Stern, I'm following in your footsteps!)
Kevin D. Mitnick
#11. You are significantly more likely to die in a car accident, especially if you fail to wear a seat belt, than to be attacked by ISIS. Wear your seat belt
Jessica Stern
#12. Don't ever mistake silence for ignorance, when it is obviously stupidity
Josh Stern
#13. We have a broad array of teams. And if somebody asked me whether a team is a good buy, my response is, 'You'd better hurry up, they're going like hot cakes, and they're going to be even more valuable when we get a system that is even more sustainable.'
David Stern
#14. All great discoveries are made by opening up the changing room door
Josh Stern
#15. Every rule has an exception, and it's usually remedial
Josh Stern
#16. Again I admonish you not to be turned from your stern purpose of defending your beloved country and its free institutions by any arguments urged by ambitious and designing men, but stand fast to the Union and the old flag.
Abraham Lincoln
#17. Revenge is a dish best served in something microwaveable
Josh Stern
#18. Don't you wish some people came with a silencer?
Josh Stern
#19. All necessary measures should be taken to encourage and stimulate immigration of Jews into Palestine on a large scale. - joint statement signed by both Chaim Weizmann and Prince Faisal
Sol Stern
#20. Dialogue is not just quotation. It is grimaces, pauses, adjustments of blouse buttons, doodles on a napkin, and crossings of legs
Jerome Stern
#21. Adaptation is the only means to reduce the now-unavoidable costs of climate change over the next few decades
Nicholas Stern
#22. The flawed human error is expecting someone else to build the world we desire, rather than creating it for ourselves.
Shawn Stern
#23. Anna [Nicole Smith ] in a lot of ways always thought she was going to die young and she said that she thought she was going to be like Marilyn Monroe. Initially, Anna had always wanted to be buried near Marilyn Monroe.
Howard K. Stern
#24. I am going to carry my bed into New York City tonight
complete with dangling sheets and ripped blankets;
I am going to push it across three dark highways
or coast along under 600,000 faint stars.
Gerald Stern
#26. Don't take me under your wing and tell me that scent is duck sauce
Josh Stern
#27. My greatest fault is trying to stuff the baggage of an impossible situation into the trunk of an elegant solution
Josh Stern
#28. I expect to find Stern, secreted away in every molecule of air, and at every turn.
Kate Ellison
#29. When we refuse to accept our limitations, Nature, who is a stern realist, pays us out.
Phyllis Bottome
#30. I think people of lesser talent will become stars.
Howard Stern
#31. There's a few in our history, where the person who creates it becomes almost the product itself. Jobs is one of those.
Joshua Michael Stern
#32. To the worldy man Karma is a stern Nemesis, to the spiritual man Karma unfolds itself in harmony with his highest aspirations.
William Quan Judge
#33. Nobody ever cares what I say! I feel badly about it, I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings.
Marnie Stern
#34. The basin fell to the ground broken, and the water flowed to the feet of Madame Defarge. By strange stern ways, and through much staining blood, those feet had come to meet that water.
Charles Dickens
#35. Camus said 'Love Lasts or Love Burns'. I want a Lasting Burn-just nothing requiring a series of painful treatments by a rubber-gloved Doctor
Josh Stern
#36. Blood is thicker than water, and so is diarrhea
Josh Stern
#37. Radio is more powerful the closer we mimic the way we actually speak to each other. That's why Howard Stern is such a great radio talent. People on his show are actually speaking to each other. You might not like what they're saying, but they're real conversations.
Ira Glass
#38. Here's what happens when you die
you sit in a box and get eaten by worms. I guarantee you that when you die, nothing cool happens.
Howard Stern
#40. We're just learning that a lot of planets are small planets, and we didn't know that before, fact is, in planetary science, objects such as Pluto and the other dwarf planets in the Kuiper Belt are considered planets and called planets in everyday discourse in scientific meetings.
Alan Stern
#41. You walk into the playgrounds in Shanghai and Beijing, and you see youngsters who are shorter, shaking and baking and having attitude. And Jeremy Lin is going to inspire all of them.
David Stern
#42. Lightning Bolt and Hella are two bands I listen to, and there's a lot of finger tapping going on there.
Marnie Stern
#43. If you're lucky enough to have captured maybe two hundred memorable pictures, you still haven't captured that much experience, have you?
Phil Stern
#44. I have real fears for Cuba based on the South American experience. Where you have had such a stern regime, as Fidel's [Castro], there is no culture of politics.
John Gimlette
#45. I'm Howard Stern with a vocabulary. I'm the man he wishes he could be.
Don Imus
#46. You like some things, you don't like others. It doesn't mean there's anything wrong with the others, it just means you have an opinion.
Marnie Stern
#47. Oh righteous doom, that they who make Pleasure their only end, Ordering the whole life for its sake, Miss that whereto they tend. While they who bid stern duty lead, Content to follow, they, Of duty only taking heed, Find pleasure by the way.
Eugene Ionesco
#48. I think all my pictures are ideas, and they're ideas made into images.
Bert Stern
#49. You were spying on me?" I repeated, this time my tone was stern.
"Nonsense! I was making sure you were safe." He answered, fluttering his wings and landing in front of me. "That's what friends do.
Grace Fiorre
#50. Special-needs rescues and older rescues have always had a close place in my heart, because those are the ones that tend to get looked over. That is why I love how North Shore Animal League America has their shelter set up.
Beth Ostrosky Stern
#51. There's always someone we'd love to kill, the trick is to make it not look like an accident
Josh Stern
#52. The fools standpoint is that all social institutions are games. He sees the whole world as game playing. That's why, when people take their games seriously and take on stern and pious expressions, the fool gets the giggles because he knows that it is all a game.
Alan Watts
#53. It is only through failure and through experiment that we learn and grow.
Isaac Stern
#54. His face was stern, and much flushed. If he were really not in the habit of drinking rather more than was exactly good for him, he might have brought action against his countenance for libel, and have recovered heavy damages.
Charles Dickens
#55. Never borrow trouble, the payback's a bitch
Josh Stern
#56. Political means so many things. We are political willy-nilly. Political poetry is an easy invitation to disaster. But then so is love poetry. But we are a little more patient with bad love poetry.
Gerald Stern
#57. Nature's stern discipline enjoins mutual help at least as often as warfare. The fittest may also be the gentlest.
Theodosius Dobzhansky
#58. I do not believe for a moment that the Scriptures are against wealth. But the warning to those who make wealth their pursuit is a stern reality. Wealth must be processed through a philosophy of life that is greater than wealth itself. If not, it shapes the mind for bitter disappointments.
Ravi Zacharias
#59. People look at me weird because I'm a Howard Stern fan, but he's very misunderstood. It's the first thing I do when I get in my car at a tournament - just pray that I get Howard 100 on Sirius or XM.
Keegan Bradley
#60. I'm not running from any particular problems, I just want to take some time and figure out in my life where I can keep doing what I'm doing but in a way that I can also honor what I want to do for myself.
Andy Stern
#61. There are a lot of so-called "good Americans" who are really a bunch of bums.
Howard Stern
#62. Stern and white as a tomb, older than the memory of the dead, and built by men or devils beyond the recording of myth, is the mansion in which we dwell.
Clark Ashton Smith
#63. Issac Stern rule: the better your technique, the more impossible your standards.
Richard Sennett
#64. It's a kind of liberation to break free in language, if you can break free, but it's also a confinement, because form confines you - whatever the form.
Gerald Stern
#65. Don't you wish we all lived in black light ... for one thing, it would mean an end to toothpaste as we know it
Josh Stern
#66. Reality Television is the 'Howard Stern-ation' of all that is bad with our media today
Manny Pacheco
#67. [2] or directing a stern and momentous enterprise in some crisis of
Virginia Woolf
#68. Love is universal and freely given, yet the ego insists that it be owned, that it obey the ego's stern dictates of when, how and where. In this, the ego will forever fail, for it is fighting the wrong battle. Love can never be limited or exist in separation or isolation.
Maharishi Sadasiva Isham
#69. I was in the South of France, in Saint-Tropez and I met her when it was totally unexpected. I was very lucky because she was the most beautiful woman in the world at the time. I photographed her very quickly, she was not easy as a model, but her beauty transcended anything I had seen before.
Bert Stern
#70. No! no arresting the vast wheel of time,
That round and round still turns with onward might,
Stern, dragging thousands to the dreaded night
Of an unknown hereafter.
Charles Cowden Clarke
#71. I think it's ... I don't want to become a social crusader on this issue, but I think sports, male sports, has traditionally not been an inviting environment for gay men to identify themselves. But eventually ... we will get to a place where it is not an issue in sports.
David Stern
#72. I feel that my job, as an artist, is to disturb the peace. And to disturb it intellectually, linguistically, politically and literally.
Gerald Stern
#73. I would say the referees have the toughest game to call. I would say that there's a lot of officiating done by announcers, local announcers. Sometimes you should listen to a game from both feeds, and you'd think you were listening to completely different games.
David Stern
#74. The union movement has been the best middle class job creating program that America has ever had, and it doesn't cost the government a dime.
Andy Stern
#75. Brilliantly lit from stem to stern, she looked like a sagging birthday cake.
Walter Lord
#76. Some people are so positive, that when they slip in dog poop, they pirouette
Josh Stern
#77. If you can't beat them, conjoin them
Josh Stern
#78. For it was authority that turned men suspicious and stern-faced. Authority and responsibility which made them not themselves, but a sort of corporate body that tried to think as a corporate body rather than a person.
Clifford D. Simak
#79. I'd rather be a nodding acquaintance, than a bobble head
Josh Stern
#80. Love is the canvas covering the furniture that you've become a part of
Josh Stern
#81. Karma can be an ill-timed mistress who always calls when your Mother-in-law is the first to answer the phone ... . and it would be a completely sad story had it not been so surreally hilarious.
Josh Stern
#82. David Stern might be the smartest executive in the history of professional sports. His obsession with the Vagrant Kings is one of the strangest stories.
R.E. Graswich
#83. The golf ball has no sense at all, which is why it has to be given stern lectures constantly, especially during the act of putting.
Dan Jenkins
#84. Science and policy-making thrive on challenge and questioning; they are vital to the health of inquiry and democracy.
Nicholas Stern
#85. Women, can't live with them, can't murder/suicide without them
Josh Stern
#87. Being stern was like being underwater-she could do it, but never for long, and how her whole boy burned to come up for breath!
Catherynne M Valente
#88. I was in Florida with Burt Stern, the photographer who shot Marilyn Monroe on the beach with a sweater, and we smoked a joint. The bathing suit kept coming off in the water, and I just ripped it off. I was very comfortable being naked.
Rosanna Arquette
#89. I've spent hundreds of hours working over words, and part of me, a large part of me, has a desire to do something else.
Gerald Stern
#90. American workers won't be able to compete fairly for jobs until companies have to pay higher wages in countries like China and India.
Andy Stern
#91. I think this point is so important, I'm going to repeat it: You should never listen to criticism that is primarily intended to wound, even if it contains more than a grain of truth.
Robin Stern
#92. I have throbbing headaches about a lot of things, and Howard Stern isn't one of them.
Robert Greenblatt
#93. Only the good die young'- especially when they're milk fed
Josh Stern
#94. I will never vote Democrat again, they are Communists.
Howard Stern
#95. You'll never know what psychopathic heights you're capable of, just lying there on the sofa
Josh Stern
#96. When you're out in the wilderness and get back to base camp only to discover sleeping bag turndown service ... .that's no chocolate on the pillow
Josh Stern
#97. Though Duty's face is stern, her path is best: They sweetly sleep who die upon her breast.
Henry Abbey
#98. I don't perceive my role as a newsman at all. I'm a comedian from stem to stern. You can cut me open and count the rings of jokes.
Stephen Colbert
#99. Hark! Peace! It was the owl that shrieked, the fatal bellman, Which gives the stern'st good-night. He is about it.
William Shakespeare
#100. My conscience hath a thousand several tongues,
And every tongue brings in a several tale,
And every tale condemns me for a villain.
Perjury, perjury, in the high'st degree;
Murder, stern murder in the dir'st degree,
Throng to the bar, crying all, 'Guilty!, guilty!
William Shakespeare