Shelley Berman Quotes

#1. When I first started out, 'Time' magazine did an article on what it called 'the sick comics,' and they were myself, Shelley Berman, Nichols & May, Jonathan Winters, Lenny Bruce, and Mort Sahl. We were considered 'sick.'

Bob Newhart

#2. I heard the other day of a man who paid a psychologist $50 to cure him of an inferiority complex - and later was fined $25 and costs for talking back to a traffic cop.

Shelley Berman

#3. I will always love to perform standup comedy.

Shelley Berman

#4. A large praying mantis was performing ablutions on the springy stem of the kid's cowlick. The gunslinger snorted laughter-the first in gods knew how long-and set the fire and went after water.

Stephen King

#5. If a god showed up every time you put a quarter in the prayer slot it wouldn't be God, it would be a puppet that you could control by doing that ... that would make the deity subservient to you. So it wouldn't be a deity would it?

Margaret Atwood

#6. We teach reading, writing and math by [having students do] them. But we teach democracy by lecture.

Shelley Berman

#7. The most memorable performance was my appearance in concert in Carnegie Hall. The first standup to do so.

Shelley Berman

#8. So that this thing that aired in 1963 would result a few years later in personal bankruptcy, would result in having people be on edge with me, wondering when I'm going to blow up.

Shelley Berman

#9. While you're improvising, you may come up with something which will break him up. As soon as that smile comes out, you know that, hey, we're having fun.

Shelley Berman

#10. I was an actor before becoming a comedian.

Shelley Berman

#11. I just wanted to tell you that I understand if you go. It's okay if you have to leave us. It's okay if you want to stop fighting.

Gayle Forman

#12. OMG I HAVE GOODREADS

Jasmin

#13. The most unusual salesman I ever met is a fellow who made a modest fortune purveying lightning rods. But he suddenly lost interest in his work. He got caught in a storm with a bunch of samples in his arms.

Shelley Berman

#14. He was Pinocchio to my Gepetto.

Jenny O'Connell

#15. Outside came in '60. The Edge in '61. All three made Gold, but the biggest seller was Inside.

Shelley Berman

#16. Though it sold very well, I hated The Edge.

Shelley Berman

#17. If a teacher does not involve himself, his values, his commitments, in the course of discussion, why should the students?

Paul Wellstone

#18. Belief conditions experience, and experience then strengthens belief.

Jiddu Krishnamurti

#19. Ukraine had quite serious impact on the many Russians. They could see that ordinary people in Ukraine which is a bordering state, very close to Russia, the people of this state are, they didn't want to tolerate anymore the power abuse by Ukrainian officials.

Garry Kasparov

#20. My whole act is confession.

Shelley Berman

#21. Keep healthy. The longer you live, the smaller the fraction of your life was spent in school.

C.C. Phillips

#22. If you've never met a student from the University of Chicago, I'll describe him to you. If you give him a glass of water, he says, 'This is a glass of water. But is it a glass of water? And if it is a glass of water, why is it a glass of water?' And eventually he dies of thirst.

Shelley Berman

#23. Inside was the second LP album of a comedian's performance before an audience.

Shelley Berman

#24. As a culture I see us as presently deprived of subtleties. The music is loud, the anger is elevated, sex seems lacking in sweetness and privacy.

Shelley Berman

#25. 'The Observer's Very Short List' is another example of how the Observer Media Group offers its readers the most cutting-edge information, available in a variety of platforms and written by an editorial staff known for its distinctive and discerning style and wit.

Jared Kushner

#26. I am careful with my material and presentation.

Shelley Berman

#27. A hotel is a place that keeps the manufacturers of 25-watt bulbs in business.

Shelley Berman

#28. Incidentally, I'm still looking for acting work, my first love.

Shelley Berman

#29. The Steve Allen Sunday night show had the right to two options after my first performance.

Shelley Berman

#30. I am in the Master of Professional Writing program teaching Humor Writing, Literary and Dramatic.

Shelley Berman

#31. But he who never sins can little boast Compared to him who goes and sins no more!

Nathaniel Parker Willis

#32. Unquestionably, standup comedy is and has always been an art form.

Shelley Berman

#33. The old problems - love, money, security, status, health, etc. - are still here to plague us or please us.

Shelley Berman

#34. I believe it is important for comedians to know who came before them.

Shelley Berman

#35. I do get offered a lot more roles than I choose to do. I'm very busy as a producer and a writer, especially with my Internet stuff, and I tend to only accept the roles that I know will have an impact and has a fanbase.

Felicia Day

#36. Are you absolutely certain this is safe?" Matthew Galloway asked, peering suspiciously out over the lake.

Lauren James

#37. I quit smoking well over twenty years ago.

Shelley Berman

#38. She had such unusual eyes. They made me think of the seaside, and so I called her Ocean, and could not have told you why.

Neil Gaiman

#39. Don't aim at any impossible heroisms. Strive rather to be quiet in your own sphere. Don't live in the cloudland of some transcendental heaven; do your best to bring the glory of a real heaven down, and ray it out upon your fellows in this work-day world.

William Morley Punshon

#40. As much experience, education and awareness as one can attain is important for a comedian.

Shelley Berman

#41. My first job was at a Chicago night club called Mr. Kelly's.

Shelley Berman