Sayings About Texas Funny

#1. The Artist always has the masters in his eyes. - Author: Ralph Waldo Emerson

#2. I don't think anybody in the world is perfect. I don't think anybody is absolutely good or bad or stupid. Each one of us combines all those qualities in our daily lives, I think. - Author: Anita Rau Badami

#3. So to me, Texas Hold 'em puts me to sleep. At least when you play stud, you can be funny as you deal. Somebody some day is going to come up with a Stud show that's going to work. - Author: Joseph Bologna

#4. It wasn't until the Nobel Prize that they really thawed out. They couldn't understand my books, but they could understand $30,000. - Author: William Faulkner

#5. I had a bag of Fritos, they were Texas grilled Fritos. These Fritos had grill marks on them. They remind me of summer, when we used to fire up the barbeque and throw down some Fritos. I can still see my dad with the apron on. Better flip that Frito, dad, you know how I like it. - Author: Mitch Hedberg

#6. I think the satirist is always basically optimistic. The satirist's complaint about society is always that it doesn't measure up to a fairly high ideal he has. I think that even the bitterest satirist, even a man like Swift, was probably rather an optimist at heart. - Author: John Dos Passos

#7. I believe in greater self-sufficiency. International sport is tough, no doubt, but there shouldn't be too many crutches. In most cases sports psychologists are crutches, and they tend to soften rather than harden the players. - Author: Glenn Turner

#8. Joaquin Jackson's frank and colorful account of his long career as a modern-day Texas Ranger thrills like an action novel, yet the stories are true, sometimes funny, sometimes tragic, but always gripping. I could hardly put the book down ... The writing is superb. - Author: Elmer Kelton

#9. I feel like I've been ironing all day in high heels and no brassiere. ~Tizzy Donovan, Laid Out and Candle Lit - Author: Ann Everett

#10. This is America. We're entitled to our opinions."
"Wrong. This is Texas. And my opinion is the only one that counts. - Author: Susan Elizabeth Phillips

#11. So here my check. Overdue and overdrawn.
Cash it in hell. - Author: Jack Ketchum

#12. 'A Tuna Christmas' is the second in a series of plays created by Joe Sears and Jaston Williams featuring the fictional town of Greater Tuna, the third-smallest town in Texas. What makes these plays so hysterically funny is the accurate portrayal of small-town life in the Lone Star State. - Author: Lori Wilde