Quotes About Cancer Funny

#1. The widespread belief that Yuppies as a class would perish from Brie-cheese poisoning turned out to be over-optimistic. - Author: Alfred Adler

#2. Life's better now. I wouldn't do it all over again, though. It's funny how life works. Maybe it was meant to happen for many reasons, because my life in many ways richer. - Author: Giuliana Rancic

#3. Old age is as forgetful as youth, and more incorrigible; it displays the same inattentiveness to conditions; its memory becomes self-repeating and degenerates into an instinctive reaction, like a bird's chirp. - Author: George Santayana

#4. It is character that communicates most eloquently. As Emerson once put it, What you are shouts so loudly in my ears I cannot hear what you say. - Author: Stephen R. Covey

#5. It's funny how one life-changing event could make you forget what happiness felt like. - Author: Christie Cote

#6. When it rains it pours and when it shines you get melanoma. - Author: Sol Luckman

#7. It's hard, omigod remember? Being a kid. - Author: Erica Lorraine Scheidt

#8. I never felt popular as a child and never had best friends. - Author: Rachel Stevens

#9. Always find the funny. - Author: Amy Susan Crohn

#10. Let the people decide through the marketplace mechanism what they wish to see and hear. Why is there this national obsession to tamper with this box of transistors and tubes when we don't do the same for Time magazine? - Author: Mark S. Fowler

#11. At that instant i knew there was no horror the world could offer - no war, no genocide, no famine, no childhood cancer - to which Sidney Kroll would not see the funny side - Author: Robert Harris

#12. On current form, both teams will probably lose. - Author: Aidy Boothroyd

#13. If you ever feel the need of my love, just open the window. My heart will always be there. - Author: Debasish Mridha

#14. The artist Nature often achieves greatest effect when not working with a full palette. - Author: Jim Perrin

#15. Cancer is always funny. - Author: Jim Gaffigan

#16. I hope we find a cure for every major disease, because I'm tired of walking 5K. I'm pretty sure I don't have to sweat for cancer. I'll write a check. - Author: Daniel Tosh

#17. I am committing suicide by cigarette, I replied. She thought that was reasonably funny. I didn't. I thought it was hideous that I should scorn life that much, sucking away on cancer sticks. My brand is Pall Mall. The authentic suicides ask for Pall Malls. The dilettantes ask for Pell Mells. - Author: Kurt Vonnegut

#18. I don't give a damn what other people think. It's entirely their own business. I'm not writing for other people. - Author: Harold Pinter

#19. I went to the airport, I put my bag in the x-ray machine, I found out my bag has cancer. It only has six more months to hold stuff. - Author: Mitch Hedberg

#20. It's kind of funny. When I got my diagnosis - cancer - I said to myself, 'Why me?' And then, the other day, when I got the good news, I said the same thing. - Author: Walter White

#21. I stared at the phone in disbelief, then ripped a clean sheet of paper from my notebook. I scribbled ' Jerk ' on the first line. On the line beneath it I added, ' Smokes cigars. Will die of lung cancer. Hopefully soon. - Author: Becca Fitzpatrick

#22. Donald, I'm not sure if you're even aware of this, but the only difference between you and Michael Douglas from the movie, Wall Street, is that no one's going to be sad when you get cancer. - Author: Anthony Jeselnik

#23. but you can feel awful guilty about nothing when the men you're with don't trust you. - Author: Walter Van Tilburg Clark

#24. He gave me a rueful smile, his brown eyes so endearing. I could tell he was about to say something funny. I just knew him that well. That's like asking if I'm a fan of cancer. I fucking hate it, but do I know how to get rid of it? Not fucking likely. - Author: R.K. Lilley

#25. I could taste Millard's blood in the water. - Author: Ransom Riggs

#26. Ladies gotta say no to their husbands at the movies. They gotta say: "No, we are watching back-to-back cancer movies. And then this movie about a cat." - Author: Tina Fey

#27. In the end, there's something of the puritan work ethic about me that roles really must sustain me on an intellectual level. - Author: Damian Lewis

#28. I felt like I wasn't living thoroughly enough - I was distracted in ways I wouldn't be if I'd been born in 1929. - Author: Miranda July

#29. Also, one of the simplest paths to deep change is for the less powerful to speak as much as they listen, and for the more powerful to listen as much as they speak. - Author: Gloria Steinem

#30. My life had made me funny, and cancer wasn't going to change that, - Author: Gilda Radner