Not My Birthday Quotes

#1. I hate to tell you this, but it's not my birthday. Do I still get the present? ~ Michael McCade

Samanthe Beck

#2. I sometimes have birthday parties for the kids in my neighborhood and then pretend to suggest that I am going to molest them to the parents. It's a hilarious prank even though I am not a paedophile.

Thom Yorke

#3. I had never wanted to kiss a girl so much in my life. "Happy birthday, Pigeon," I said, trying very hard not to press my lips against hers.

Jamie McGuire

#4. I think the best thing about my job is that I have my life documented, which not many people get to have. They have a photo here and there and maybe some video footage from a birthday. My kids will be able to see me growing up.

Kirsten Dunst

#5. Just before my 16th birthday, Natalie Dormer said to me, 'As soon as you turn 16, you're going to work adult hours. People will try take advantage of you, so it's important not to be a pushover.'

Sophie Turner

#6. There are many beautiful songs but I do not dedicate any of them to you because they do not describe the infinite love I feel for you. It is better that I tell you that myself, that I love you with all my strength. Have a happy birthday.

Auliq Ice

#7. I remember for my 18th birthday, I was going to get a tattoo, and I made the mistake of thinking I was a man and telling my father, and he was like, 'Oh yeah? You better tattoo a new address on your arm, because you're not living here!' And that was the end of that discussion.

Adam Ferrara

#8. If there's one thing I really want for my birthday, that is for the mining company not to mine my daddy's reserve.

Bindi Irwin

#9. It's my birthday today. I'm not 17 anymore. The 17 Janis Ian sang about where one learns the truth. But what she failed to mention is that you keep on learning truths after 17 and I want to keep on learning truths till the day I die.

Melina Marchetta

#10. Now, they're saying I groped a male staffer. Yes, I did. Not only did I grope him, I tickled him until he couldn't breathe and four guys jumped on top of me. It was my 50th birthday.

Eric Massa

#11. By the time of my ninth birthday, I had become a bit of a socialist, as I am said by conservative colleagues to be to this day. I went on within the next few years to volunteer as an envelope stuffer for the American Labor Party, and my political thinking has not shifted measurably since that time.

Sherwin B. Nuland

#12. I gave up drinking before my twentieth birthday. I haven't touched the stuff since. And I've discovered that not everyone who does horrible things is a horrible person.

Brent Jones

#13. I do things every day for my birthday. I'm just not a party girl.

Kim Basinger

#14. I'd be happy to live till 80 as long as I was comfortable and in good health. Mind you, ask me again on the eve of my 80th birthday. Even so, I hope we don't all start living to be 120. I'm not sure I'd cope with another 60 years.

Bonnie Tyler

#15. They decided as part of my 75th birthday celebrations that I would be entitled to fly first class. I'll be honest, I'm not good at flying anymore. To my credit, I can stretch out on two coach seats.

Chuck Feeney

#16. I was looking for something within Judaism that had a spiritual nature and not just a religious nature. So my trainer at the time was the one who took me to the Kabbalah center on my 40th birthday. I was like, "Oh, this is so cool." I was just ready for it. I was ready for something different.

Sandra Bernhard

#17. You were the best birthday present I ever got."
"Thank you."
"I wanted to give you something back, but I've got to warn you that it's not half as good as my present. Even so, you have to keep it."
"All right."
He draped the pink bow around his neck and grinned. "Happy birthday, Rosebud.

Susan Elizabeth Phillips

#18. ...as a woman who was raised with the idea that the world was at my fingertips, that anything I wanted could be mine for the taking, on the eve of my thirtieth birthday I am ready to stand up and say that trying to have it all is not all it's cracked up to be.

Anna Mitchael

#19. As I approach my 88th birthday, it's become apparent to me that my eyes and ears, among other appurtenances, aren't quite what they used to be. The prospect of long flights to wherever in search of whatever are not quite as appealing.

Mike Wallace

#20. I trained to be a priest - started to. I went to seminary school when I was 11. I wanted to be a priest, but when they told me I could never have sex, not even on my birthday, I changed my mind.

Johnny Vegas

#21. I am not insecure enough to count the bouquets I receive on my birthday, I don't assess my popularity by the number of magazine covers I am on, I don't get worried if my song is on the seventh position on countdown charts.

Shahrukh Khan

#22. I grew up doing all that stuff because I was obsessed with the '50s. I had sock hops for birthday parties. So I've always done The Twist and stuff. It was pretty natural and, with my parents doing it all the time, I'd just copy them. Not very pretty.

Brittany Snow

#23. My son had his eighth birthday recently and we had a chance to borrow the film and show it to all of his friends that was at his birthday party and they loved it. I was a little nervous. I said they might not even like it, and say his daddy's movie is wack, but they loved it.

Blair Underwood

#24. Inspiration is very nice when you get it. It's like being given a present you weren't expecting. You don't hand the present back and say, 'My birthday's not till November.' You take it and run.

Jan Mark

#25. Less than two weeks before my 34th birthday, I bought pots. Most people were amazed that I did not previously own pots, but that was before I explained that I had never used my oven, and used my stovetop for my dishrack.

Rachel Sklar

#26. My wife always knows exactly," he said. There was a bit of tobacco on his wet lip. "But that's probably because she only lets me do it twice a year, Valentine's and my birthday, so it's not hard to figure." He stepped out the door and then turned to say, "I got two kids born in

Alice McDermott

#27. If this is where you ask me to run around in my birthday suit, I'm not entirely comfortable with that, I said, smirking.

Laura Kreitzer

#28. I had sort of had a 21st birthday when I was 17, 18 years old living in Japan. I had all of that stuff sort of happen earlier for me, which happens to a lot of people. My 21st birthday was just a little boring. Not a great story.

Sarah Wright

#29. It will be my birthday on Tuesday. Last year, I reached the painful conclusion that there wasn't enough time left to read every book ever written. This year, my gloomy realisation is even more painful - I will not be able to correct everyone's mistakes before I depart.

Daniel Finkelstein

#30. I, Alex Cross do solemnly promise-to all those present at this birthday party- to do my best to balance my life at home with my work,life,and not to go over to the dark side ever again.

James Patterson

#31. Turning one hundred was the worst birthday of my life. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. Turning 101 was not so bad. Once you're past that century mark, it's just not as shocking.

Annie Elizabeth Delany

#32. My birthday is Feb. 11, and I'm both excited and not excited by it. You'll never be 15 again, and you really, really need to savor every day like it's your last.

Q'orianka Kilcher

#33. This would be a perfect day if Ray were here with us, but he's not far away. He's doing well, and I know he'd like to enjoy yourself, Ana. To all of you, thank you for coming to share my beautiful wife's birthday, the first of many to come. Happy birthday, my love. - Christian Grey

E.L. James

#34. Jewellery's not a big thing for me. The only thing I wear is a gold cross on a chain that I got for my 21st birthday. You have to take it off every day for filming, but that's the only time I'm not wearing it. You won't find me in rings, bracelets or earrings.

Jonas Armstrong

#35. Every year before a big competition, I get hurt doing stuff I should not be doing. One year it was my little brother's 12th birthday. We all played hide-and-seek late at night. I climbed up a 30-foot tree, thinking he'd never catch me. I tripped and fell on one of the branches and I hit my head.

Ryan Lochte

#36. Our pleasures in literature do not, I think, decline with age; last 1st of January was my eighty-second birthday, and I think that I had as much enjoyment from books as I ever had in my life.

Maria Edgeworth

#37. If you don't read my book, I'm not coming to your birthday party.

Tim Yeager

#38. I threw my 20th birthday party at Brown, and I didn't even have to say to anyone not to put pictures on Facebook. Not a single picture went up. That was when I knew I'd found a solid group of friends, and I felt like I belonged.

Emma Watson

#39. My whole family's gonna be set for life and I'm not stopping rappin until that happens. I already know I got a five year plan. I'm 26 now and I'm gonna bow out on my 31st birthday. Peace, later, holla, I'm gone.

Jayceon Terrell Taylor