My Boyfriend Cant Funny Famous Quotes & Sayings

List of top 30 famous quotes and sayings about my boyfriend cant funny to read and share with friends on your Facebook, Twitter, blogs.

Top 30 My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes

#1. I know what you want. And I know what you need. But I'm gonna screw it up, yeah, cause I'm an idiot. And I'm your boyfriend. - Author: Jimmy Fallon
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1210758
#2. Her boyfriend, Camdon or Brandon or whatever his name is, tosses Callie his wallet and says, 'Gotta take a leak.' They exchange a kiss--- which, I mean, why? Is he going to drown in the toilet? - Author: Julie Murphy
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1721953
#3. After that came her biggie: a triple murder
her dealer, the dealer's sister, and the dealer's sister's boyfriend.
Reading that made me feel a little funny that we'd fucked and I'd loved her. - Author: George Saunders
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1693646
#4. You should get a better boyfriend. One with an IQ higher than a turnip. - Author: Robyn Carr
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1672158
#5. What's a book boyfriend and how do I find them so I can kick their asses? - Author: M.D. Saperstein
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1664263
#6. For a long time, I refused to wear jeans. I liked high-waisted pants, but jeans made me feel like I wasn't being unique. Even now, I won't wear the skinny-jeans style, because most people wear those - they have to be baggier, boyfriend-looking, or sort of like a mom jean. I'm real funny that way. - Author: Elle Fanning
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1650001
#7. I want to go out with my friends and have a laugh. It's funny: you always attract men when you don't want them - you'll go out, and they'll want your number, while you're left thinking, 'Where were you when I wanted a boyfriend?' - Author: Rebecca Ferguson
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1644197
#8. My ex-boyfriend can round last night, which was weird because I didn't know he was in a coma. - Author: Jo Brand
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1592724
#9. The worst part is, he's been extra sweet because he's trying to make everything okay again. If he weren't a serial killer, he'd be the perfect boyfriend - Author: Kelly Oram
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1465844
#10. Boyfriend?"
Her cheeks heated. "Yes."
"Funny name."
"What?" She frowned. "Ernest is a perfectly nice name."
"Oh, I thought I heard you call him Ermine. - Author: Nalini Singh
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1453337
#11. Everything I buy is vintage and smells funny. Maybe that's why I don't have a boyfriend. - Author: Lucy Liu
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1441711
#12. Nah, Dad, I'm good. Please leave me in this hotel bedroom with my handsome boyfriend. And several of his relatives, and a very sharp weapon."
"Clearly I went badly wrong somewhere when raising you," said Dad. "Well, best to do down before Tomo gets into the vodka. - Author: Sarah Rees Brennan
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1413312
#13. The skanky vamp biting for bucks on the dark end of state street is your ex boyfriend? William asked. The look on William's face implied he hoped I washed after interacting with Parrish - Author: Tate Hallaway
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1385127
#14. Luke is the sort of boy Taylor Swift could at least three songs out of. - Author: Beth Garrod
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1353731
#15. I am a vicious and unrepentant killer who should be locked up. With him, my idiot boyfriend. - Author: Kylie Scott
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1259218
#16. Speaking of ... does this mean you get your phone back?" I shrug. "I don't really want that phone back. I'm hoping my whipped boyfriend will get me an iPhone for Christmas. - Author: Colleen Hoover
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #29601
#17. With my boyfriend, we can make sexist jokes to each other because we know it's absolutely not true. If I get home from a long day and he says: 'Go on, get in the kitchen,' it's funny because we know it's not our lives. - Author: Emily Browning
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1176430
#18. Her voice was erudite, interesting; the voice of someone who straddled two cultures with a surety and style that I wished my boyfriend could find. She was smart, funny, and, above all, completely capable of controlling her life and what happened to it. - Author: Ruth Ahmed
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1158116
#19. Think of your girlfriend or boyfriend or whomever you want to. - Author: Eugene Ormandy
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #1070098
#20. If the Lord hasn't got a boyfriend lined up for me to marry, that's his business. - Author: Barbara Kingsolver
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #979578
#21. I'm sorry I have issues with my boyfriend doing other men. I'm sorry I have issues with me doing other men. Why was I always being made to feel guilty because I wasn't having sex with more people? Wasn't it supposed to be the other way around? - Author: Laurell K. Hamilton
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #961703
#22. He's not my boyfriend."
"Ha. That's a good one. I saw you two tonsil surfing out there."
I could kill her. "I don't even have tonsils!"
"I know that and I bet Nick knows that too, now." She slaps her leg because she's just too funny for words. - Author: Carrie Jones
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #925312
#23. I pull out my e-reader and get back to my fictional boyfriend. Lord knows he won't cheat on me. - Author: M.D. Saperstein
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #776958
#24. So does that mean if you won't fuck me because I'm high, I could fuck you because you're not? - Author: K.A. Mitchell
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #688019
#25. And Sanderson?" "Are you kidding? I bet his girlfriend is a dominatrix or something." "Or his boyfriend." "No, he's so not cool enough to be gay." She was very funny. - Author: Mary Calmes
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #613845
#26. Is this your boyfriend?" the first nun asked.
Clair Olivia looked me up and down. "No. This is my gay friend who decided he was straight and single-handedly wrecked havoc at an all-boys school in Massachusetts this fall. He's gay again and home for Christmas, so yay! - Author: Bill Konigsberg
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #387083
#27. I can't pass a puppy, a kid or a baby without stopping. It's really annoying to every boyfriend I've ever head. My mother will roll her eyes and go, "God, really?!" But, I find children funny and great, and I love them. - Author: Minnie Driver
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #329122
#28. Why did you tell her I'm your boyfriend? Why doesn't she know about your real one? - Timmy
He's English! And Mom ... Mom hates foreigners!
- Cat - Author: Jeaniene Frost
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #277961
#29. You set fire to my house, killed my family, and ate my dog. But steal my boyfriend? That's a step too far. - Author: Libba Bray
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #169682
#30. Recently thought of deleting my Facebook account and start using twitter, but realized it's not easy. Facebook has become like the boyfriend I no longer like but scared to dump because I've invested so much time in the relationship. - Author: Manasa Rao
My Boyfriend Cant Funny Quotes #144735

Famous Authors

Popular Topics