Top 34 Gene Weingarten Quotes
#1. While it is true that many hep C victims became infected through blood transfusions or organ transplants or in other innocent ways, mine was contracted during my college years, when I showed as much care for my personal health as your average suicide bomber.
Gene Weingarten
#2. I don't see a point in advertising my marital status when men don't. Completely ridiculous.
Gene Weingarten
#3. It's as though when you order a sirloin steak, it comes with a side of maggots,
Gene Weingarten
#4. I always thought there was some cleverness to the joke diet in which you could eat as much as you want and as often as you want, but everything must be consumed naked in front of a full-length mirror. That would deter me!
Gene Weingarten
#5. It is a cliche, and it is also true, that humor springs from existential pain - from a need to blunt the awareness that life is essentially a fatal disease of unpredictable symptoms and unknown duration.
Gene Weingarten
#6. The whole point of corporate mascots is to be distinctive. No one in his right mind would ever confuse the Hamburglar with Mayor McCheese.
Gene Weingarten
#7. I believe that sensitivity to issues of race and ethnicity is important, and nuanced, even more so when it intersects with the issue of free speech.
Gene Weingarten
#8. Sometimes, homely things are done for the best reasons in the world and thus achieve a beauty of their own.
Gene Weingarten
#9. When you are interviewing someone, don't just write down what he says. Ask yourself: Does this guy remind you of someone? What does the room feel like? Notice smells, voice inflection, neighborhoods you pass through. Be a cinematographer.
Gene Weingarten
#10. I am the most skilled parallel parker the world has ever known.
Gene Weingarten
#11. When my daughter was a senior in high school, I remember noticing, almost in passing, that her friends were very cute. Which made me realize her friends' fathers probably found Molly very cute.
Gene Weingarten
#12. I do not believe in public shaming. I do believe that young adults go to college to learn things, and that this process will almost inevitably result in their making mistakes and misjudgments and otherwise acting badly.
Gene Weingarten
#13. I felt like I was never going to be a great writer. I felt like I was going to be a good writer at best. I wanted to be great at something.
Gene Weingarten
#15. For $60, I once bought a neck massage at a 'massage parlor' that advertised in 'The Washington Post.'
Gene Weingarten
#16. The Pulitzer is a crapshoot. Your piece has to hit a few people the right way at the right moment.
Gene Weingarten
#17. The poet Billy Collins once laughingly observed that all babies are born with a knowledge of poetry, because the lub-dub of the mother's heart is in iambic meter. Then, Collins said, life slowly starts to choke the poetry out of us. It may be true with music, too.
Gene Weingarten
#18. Because I live and work in Washington, D.C., I have a ringside seat at the world capital of The Persuasive Arts, or, as I like to call it, The Opinions Racket.
Gene Weingarten
#19. Mostly, you become a writer not because you want to get rich or famous, but because you have to write; because there is something inside that must come out.
Gene Weingarten
#20. Every single fat comic uses his weight as a punchline. There is something sad about that.
Gene Weingarten
#21. I believe that the fragile-flower, idea-intolerant society of victimhood that is being cultivated in many colleges today is really bad.
Gene Weingarten
#22. When she was too young to resist, or even to understand, I turned my daughter into a lifelong, rabid Yankees fan.
Gene Weingarten
#23. Johnny Hart became much less funny after he found sobriety, and religion, around the same time.
Gene Weingarten
#24. I have two favorites: Reading Kierkegaard while listening to Mozart's Piano Concerto 9 in E Flat Major, and reading early Bazooka Joe comics in Hebrew.
Gene Weingarten
#25. That is my theory to explain the I don't knows. It's human.
Gene Weingarten
#26. I once found myself driving, smoking a cigar, taking notes, and talking on the phone at the same time. I only became completely aware of this when I had to shift, and realized something had to give.
Gene Weingarten
#27. I disagree with those who suggest that we permanently close down the U.S. mail on the grounds that it can kill you. That is sheer hysteria. I think we should permanently close down the U.S. mail on the grounds that it has been making us sick for quite a while.
Gene Weingarten
#28. I don't think there is prejudice against atheists the same way there is prejudice against fat people. I don't think people hate or contemn atheists; I think people feel sorry for atheists.
Gene Weingarten
#29. The one thing an aspiring writer must understand is that it's hard. If you think it's not hard, you're not doing it right.
Gene Weingarten
#30. One thing I am learning from the kitten is that everything he is doing seems to be in preparation for murder.
Gene Weingarten
#31. The fact that Gene Weingarten and I and Bathroom Inventory are now part of some kind of Matrix of Poop strongly suggests that the Pulitzer is not what it once was.
Dave Barry
#32. I am not saying Rubin Carter was guilty. I am saying he was very likely guilty.
Gene Weingarten
#33. One of my favorite footnotes in the hypochondria book [The Hypochondriac's Guide to Life. And Death.] was about the death of one of the King Charleses. He was essentially bled and vomited to death by his doctors. They also drilled holes in his head.
Gene Weingarten
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