Funny Roald Dahl Quotes

#1. Jack, I know I'm not perfect, but I'm really hoping you're not ready to give up on me yet. I don't have gifts or love letters or anything like you had. But what I can give you is my word, my promise, my vow to you. Which I will back up with actions, by the way.

J. Sterling

#2. That which Steinitz gave to the theoretical aspect of the game when he was at his best is very remote to all out home-bred chess philosophers, but with his views on Morphy, whom he tries to discredit completely, it is of course impossible to agree.

Alexander Alekhine

#3. You know, we're very private, and I think that we really separate and try to keep our privacy to ourselves. There's things that people assume a lot of times, and we understand that people are interested, but we really try to keep our family life private as much as we can.

Tim McGraw

#4. A robust Liberian middle-class fosters the advancement of social wealth and a well-educated Liberian society.

Henry Johnson Jr

#5. It's a funny thing about mothers and fathers. Even when their own child is the most disgusting little blister you could ever imagine, they still think that he or she is wonderful.

Roald Dahl

#6. Books shouldn't be daunting, they should be funny, exciting and wonderful.

Roald Dahl

#7. There aren't many funny bits in Mr Tolkien either,' Matilda said.
'Do you think that all children's books ought to have funny bits in them?' Miss Honey asked.
'I do,' Matilda said. 'Children are not so serious as grown-ups and love to laugh.

Roald Dahl

#8. The snozberries taste like snozberries!

Roald Dahl

#9. If anyone knew where they were, I'd send the ISDBB (Incredibly Stupid and Dumb Beyond Belief) award to the two guys who tried to break in to the Ohio penitentiary.

Erma Bombeck

#10. Alienation between the content and form happens frequently in my poems because I obstinately carry on dismantling my body, an act you can also call "dismantling delusion." I think that after I dismantle my female body, I can finally dismantle established lyric poems.

Kim Hyesoon

#11. Don't gobblefunk around with words.

Roald Dahl

#12. I didn't like horses when I was a kid.

Mary Gaitskill

#13. A writer is like a gypsy. He owes no allegiance to any government. If he is a good writer he will never like any government he lives under. His hand should be against it and its hand will always be against him.

Ernest Hemingway,

#14. I have a passion for teaching kids to become readers, to become comfortable with a book, not daunted. Books shouldn't be daunting, they should be funny, exciting and wonderful; and learning to be a reader gives a terrific advantage.

Roald Dahl