Funny Police Famous Quotes & Sayings

List of top 33 famous quotes and sayings about funny police to read and share with friends on your Facebook, Twitter, blogs.

Top 33 Funny Police Quotes

#1. In 1979, Dubai had learned a valuable lesson from the Iranian Revolution and Soviet invasion of Afghanistan: trouble has its bright side. - Author: Misha Glenny
Funny Police Quotes #29548
#2. Learn from the past, but don't live there. Build on what you know so that you don't repeat mistakes. Resolve to learn something new every day. Because every 24 hours, you have the opportunity to have the best day of your company's life. - Author: Harvey MacKay
Funny Police Quotes #41891
#3. She has been kissed as often as a police-court Bible, and by much the same class of people. - Author: Robertson Davies
Funny Police Quotes #52777
#4. And tell them what?" Jace said witheringly. "That invisible people are bothering you? Trust me, little girl, the police aren't going to arrest someone they can't see - Author: Cassandra Clare
Funny Police Quotes #227437
#5. You don't realise how language actually interferes with communication until you don't have it, how it gets in the way like an overdominant sense. - Author: Lily King
Funny Police Quotes #287840
#6. Commissioner Marlowe stood on the platform with his arms crossed as we disembarked. He had the cheerful demeanor of someone who has been beaten about the face all night with a sock full of porridge--only even more so than usual. - Author: William Ritter
Funny Police Quotes #305539
#7. It's goddamned funny in this police racket how an old woman can look out of a window and see a guy running and pick him out of a line-up six months later, but we can show hotel help a clear photo and they just can't be sure.'
'That's one of the qualifications for good hotel help,' I said. - Author: Raymond Chandler
Funny Police Quotes #457915
#8. The police stopped me when I was out in my car. They told me it was a spot check. I admitted to two pimples and a boil. - Author: Chic Murray
Funny Police Quotes #461844
#9. As you may or may not know, in keeping with the high-class tone of Beverly Hills, our police force is probably the most snobbish group of gendarmes in the world. It is said that the Beverly Hills Police Department is so fancy that it has an unlisted number. - Author: Jack Benny
Funny Police Quotes #521717
#10. A casino in South Dakota was robbed by a man dressed as a mummy. The police described the suspect as anywhere between 25 and 8,000 years old. - Author: Craig Ferguson
Funny Police Quotes #636346
#11. If you ever see me getting beaten by the police, put down the video camera and come help me. - Author: Bobcat Goldthwait
Funny Police Quotes #699514
#12. If we take matrimony at it's lowest, we regard it as a sort of friendship recognised by the police. - Author: Robert Louis Stevenson
Funny Police Quotes #703975
#13. The police are on the way to arrest you for stealing my heart, hijacking my feelings, and driving me crazy. - Author: Harriet Morgan
Funny Police Quotes #829564
#14. I almost forgot to tell you - you have the right to remain silent, but if you do, my boys at the station will process your bones to help you confess. - Author: Rohinton Mistry
Funny Police Quotes #941214
#15. If you take the money away, a lot of the footballers would still be playing football. So, the money has nothing to do with it. - Author: Alan Shearer
Funny Police Quotes #946282
#16. Children should be taught to question everything ... everything they read and everything they hear. - Author: George Carlin
Funny Police Quotes #1023955
#17. I'm afraid that this is me getting on my high horse now but we have yob television, yob newspapers, and funny enough whereas it was my mum and dad, school, police, church who used to set the standards, now it's tabloids and yob television who set the standards by which people live. - Author: Gordon Strachan
Funny Police Quotes #1062139
#18. My great grandmother threw herself in front of a bus. The police tried to say she was committed suicide but the family knew she was just trying to stop civil rights. - Author: Anthony Jeselnik
Funny Police Quotes #1126362
#19. Kicking a police car? Really?' Caleb shrugged. 'Car offended me. It was sitting right where I wanted to stand. What would you do? - Author: Sherrilyn Kenyon
Funny Police Quotes #1129405
#20. In England, if you commit a crime, the police don't have a gun and you don't have a gun. If you commit a crime, the police will say 'Stop, or I'll say stop again.' - Author: Robin Williams
Funny Police Quotes #1268223
#21. Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with hundreds and thousands. Police say that he topped himself. - Author: Tommy Cooper
Funny Police Quotes #1392273
#22. Oh, sod off, I'm calling the Police." Another series of banging on the door. "Open up, Police." That was quick. - Author: Simon Dunn
Funny Police Quotes #1429318
#23. The police never find it as funny as you do.-T-Shirt - Author: Darynda Jones
Funny Police Quotes #1441595
#24. Dave? This is John."
"What are you-"
Alive?
"-in an ambulance or something?"
"Yes and no. Are you still at the police station?"
"Yeah. We were both-"
"Have I died yet? - Author: David Wong
Funny Police Quotes #1453522
#25. The more I see of the world, the more am i dissatisfied with it; and everyday confirms my belief of the inconsistencies of all human. - Author: Jane Austen
Funny Police Quotes #1467733
#26. Somebody broke into my house once, this is a good time to call the police, but mm mm, nope. The house was too nice. It was a real nice house, but they'd never believe i lived in it. They'd be like 'He's still here! - Author: Dave Chappelle
Funny Police Quotes #1473250
#27. Most of my relatives are police marksmen, apart from my grandad who was a bank robber. He died recently, surrounded by his family. - Author: Milton Jones
Funny Police Quotes #1486848
#28. From the very beginning, we bucked tradition. When the experts said that something was "always done" in a certain way, we'd do it our way, which was sometimes the very opposite. - Author: Paul Newman
Funny Police Quotes #1523987
#29. Getting into a fight with a popular senior. Pissing off a school teacher and the local chief of police. Hanging with two major-league losers." She slapped my back. "Welcome to high school. - Author: Harlan Coben
Funny Police Quotes #1625500
#30. 'Come back here, I'm a police officer!' and I shouted back 'No you're not! You're a monster!' - Author: Russell Howard
Funny Police Quotes #1665934
#31. You cannot pass! - Author: J.R.R. Tolkien
Funny Police Quotes #1767998
#32. The police never think it's as funny as you do. - Author: Erin Nicholas
Funny Police Quotes #1773066
#33. Knowledge does have a way of making you an outcast. - Author: Jackson Pearce
Funny Police Quotes #1775273

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