Top 59 Funny Paranormal Sayings

#1. His appearance projected danger and reinforced the common knowledge that one did not want to piss off a demon, especially this one.

Kiersten Fay

Funny Paranormal Sayings #29512
#2. I said alone!"
He nodded in agreement. "Aye, you usually say that, and I still stay. It's our way.

Kresley Cole

Funny Paranormal Sayings #66447
#3. I might be able to walk away from sexy, dangerous shifters, but chocolate had me at its beck and call.

Meghan Ciana Doidge

Funny Paranormal Sayings #118935
#4. No tricks, Syn," Ryder growled from where he stood a few feet away.
"Tricks are for kids, silly rabbit," I said

Amelia Hutchins

Funny Paranormal Sayings #170561
#5. Blake hung an arm on my shoulders. "Alone at last."
"I'm right here," Logan said.
"Maybe you shouldn't be.

A&E Kirk

Funny Paranormal Sayings #225568
#6. Son of a - Rora?" Blake slid out of the crater he'd just made in the wall. "Crap. What are you doing here?" He saw my wrist. "Handcuffs? I definitely want that story.

A&E Kirk

Funny Paranormal Sayings #244913
#7. Self-doubt is a persuasive mistress; careful not to shag her or you'll never get your balls back. - Simon Hunt

Dannika Dark

Funny Paranormal Sayings #304883
#8. I shot him daggers. Along with swords, scythes, scalpels, shivs, shanks, stilettos, and any other sharp weapon I could think of that began with an s.

A&E Kirk

Funny Paranormal Sayings #309088
#9. I tucked the feather into my bra, then glanced up at the sudden heavy silence. "What?"
Blake grinned. "What else you got in there? Can I see?"
"Shut up, Blake!" said the rest of the boys.

A&E Kirk

Funny Paranormal Sayings #470409
#10. I have this condition I call impromptu senility. I can't remember a damn thing when I don't want to.

Laurann Dohner

Funny Paranormal Sayings #494271
#11. You're not going to campus. You're going out to get drunk and play with other ladies' boobies. - Kye

Krista Alasti

Funny Paranormal Sayings #545277
#12. I'm a whore!"
Miki hit the brakes ... her hands.. gripping the steering wheel, glanced at Sara. "You're not wearing any underwear, are you?"
Sara let out a strangled squeal ...

Shelly Laurenston

Funny Paranormal Sayings #587901
#13. What do you do when you're in a room of vampires and the most dangerous one tells you that you
know too much? You bolt. What did I do? I hyperventilated.

Tijan

Funny Paranormal Sayings #608110
#14. I beg your pardon." Tameka held up her hand and shook her head in disbelief. "Did we just get passed by a centaur?"
"We got passed by a group of them," Ran corrected.
Beckit grinned at Tameka. "Goodbye Kansas, hello Oz."
"Amen to that, sister.

M.A. Wilder

Funny Paranormal Sayings #654137
#15. You should stay and keep me company, so I don't get lonely."

"You don't seem like the type of guy who gets lonely."

"Is that a compliment or an insult?"

Analia only shrugged.

Kiersten Fay

Funny Paranormal Sayings #671830
#16. Misery, thy name is Mudslide

Molly Harper

Funny Paranormal Sayings #679626
#17. Totally drained he could only manage one but he made it a good one tongue included. "Delicious " he murmured.
"So depraved " Colton muttered.
"Thank you."
"Get off me."
"Mine "
"Stings."
"Boohoo.

Finn Marlowe

Funny Paranormal Sayings #719645
#18. So just let me deal with it, I can be emotionally flawed and still love you all at the same time. I'm a great multitasker.

Holly Hood

Funny Paranormal Sayings #798171
#19. If she in fact knows magic she needs to do a spell to adjust that shitty attitude she has all of a sudden," Nona said. "I may not be a witch, but I will knock her right off that broomstick if she keeps this up.

Holly Hood

Funny Paranormal Sayings #815965
#20. So why are you so mad at me for kissing you?"
"Because you took too long. If you'd done that, say, three years ago, we wouldn't have only had one kiss before we both get horribly mutilated.

Rusty Fischer

Funny Paranormal Sayings #849068
#21. You should have been born a poet," she whispered as she pulled away.
"Screw that," he laughed as he placed a gentle kiss to her forehead. "I'd rather be a porn star," he said

Amelia Hutchins

Funny Paranormal Sayings #868212
#22. You try almost dying, being chased, then
hopping in a car with a complete (horny)
stranger.

Gena Showalter

Funny Paranormal Sayings #978883
#23. I glared at Christian as the blood smeared around. "You could have at least licked it."
He smirked darkly. "I hear that all too often.

Dannika Dark

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1035596
#24. Holy shit! Can we say unstable? Was I the only sane one around here? Well, I guess that really wasn't setting the standard very high. -Ember, Darkness Of Light

Stacey Marie Brown

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1046592
#25. Unexpected Elizabeth wasn't falling into his arms as he'd anticipated, even after he had acted heroic and been valiantly injured. Perhaps he had lost her.

Kresley Cole

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1071048
#26. When you cross over into the weird stuff, there's no going back. Hector has a theory on it. Calls it the law of 'Anomalous Phenomena Attraction.' He explained it to me once. Didn't really pay attention, but it boils down to 'weird shit pulls in more weird shit.

A. Lee Martinez

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1118419
#27. Imogene always sits
on the remote. It's probably wedged between her butt cheeks."
"Should I go get a crowbar?

Kirsten Miller

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1132126
#28. Hello little one. Did you know you're on private property?"

"Really? I had no idea." Meryn fudged.

He raised an eyebrow. "The ten foot fence right behind you didn't give it away?

Alanea Alder

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1181397
#29. You totally love him. He's your widdle snookums.

Thea Harrison

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1181422
#30. In lieu of Tasers, you'll have to hit me. Hard as you can. Then maybe some kind of fight-or-flight response will kick in and I'll turn into a bat to get away from you."
"Fight or flight."
"Yes."
"Only half of that is flight.

Adam Rex

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1187794
#31. Cale! Have you had a female in here?"

Calic laughed carelessly. "Depends on when you're referring to.

Kiersten Fay

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1212547
#32. This was sharing office space with wacko and bordering on ludicrous.

Kelly Moran

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1221949
#33. Fuck you!" "Right here?" He crossed his arms. "That definitely wouldn't help your getting over me.

Stacey Marie Brown

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1257592
#34. Me too, Arch," Jeremiah said. "I want an answer about my request to transfer. Even now, my balls are shrinking in anticipation of going back out in the cold. I said I'd give my life protecting humanity, but my balls were never in the bargain.

Rose Wynters

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1269700
#35. Ayden and I clapped our hands over our ears when the shrieking started.
"Yes. I can see that you're enthused," Jayden tried to speak over the girls' squealing, "but you need - "
Danica snatched the backstage passes from Jayden. "No way!"
"Uh, yes. Way?" Jayden said.

A&E Kirk

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1314799
#36. Because I'm attracted to you. Because you're the poster child for contradictions and I enjoy each one of them. You're funny when you're being so damn serious. You have a kind heart and protective nature that reminds me so much of my father.

N.D. Jones

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1346012
#37. Gemma had blond hair and blue eyes. I did not.
Gemma was always an A student. I was more of a B-all-you-can-be kind of gal.
When Gemma was into science, I was into skipping.
When Gemma was into foreign languages, I was into the hot Italian guy down the street.

Darynda Jones

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1354187
#38. So where did you get your information? Werewolves for Dummies? No, wait, you watched Underworld? Or maybe you were raised by wolves? Stop me
when I'm warm. - Shella

Krista Alasti

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1355215
#39. Humans did not want to know about non-humans. Funny thing was most non-humans felt the same way, happy to hide their abilities and talents to avoid witch hunts and wholesale slaughter.

Mary Buckham

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1430821
#40. She had yet to actually call him by his real name. The psychologist in him had all kinds of theories as to why. The man in him wanted to hear her say it. Just once.

Kelly Moran

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1437699
#41. Part of her wanted to comfort him, to tell him everything was going to be okay. But the rest of her just wanted to throw him to the ground and rip those jeans off him. Funny how she could be so jealous of a pair of pants. They covered the sinfully male body she longed to explore.

Rosalie Lario

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1458729
#42. Tell me, Lothaire, I want to know. Convince me why I should love you."
"Because any other female would!

Kresley Cole

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1479182
#43. A cool hand touched my arm. I jerked back. "Don't! You'll burn!"
"I'm used to it." Ayden's brown eyes twinkled. "In fact, I've been told I'm smokin'." He held out a hand, his voice soft. "By an incredible redhead who I wish, for once, knew she could trust me.

A&E Kirk

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1483845
#44. Brother Wolf gave Anna an amused look and then went back to being scary.

Patricia Briggs

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1494764
#45. I'm waiting with baited breath to hear that silver tongue of yours.

Jodie B. Cooper

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1504967
#46. I never arrive unannounced without something big and juicy in hand.
- Simon Hunt

Dannika Dark

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1526110
#47. She'd had sex with a demon. Tayla swallowed bile and tried to keep her stomach from heaving. She needed to shower. And douche.

Larissa Ione

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1573225
#48. Oh God, is this like Silence of the Lambs?" Tears flowed down her face. "I don't want to go down the hole! I won't put lotion on the skin! Look at me, you won't be able to wear my skin, I won't cover your huge ass!" She wailed.

Alanea Alder

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1592338
#49. Balls to ten minutes.

Kristen Ashley

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1597185
#50. The cross had slipped back onto my chest. I unclasped it and after wrapping the chain around the metal, tucked it into my bra

A&E Kirk

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1598056
#51. You," he purred, "are a HILF."
"A what?"
"A Horseman I'd like to fuck.

Larissa Ione

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1624705
#52. Amber was busy flirting with a rookie named Dead Meat if he didn't stop flirting back. She was eleven, for heaven's sake! Of course, he may have just been humoring her. And it was a little cute. In a gross, Chester-the-molester kind of way.

Darynda Jones

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1630506
#53. A whoosh and the lines of fire sucked back toward Ayden, flames disappearing into his hands. Back to normal.
"Ayden's the most visually effective," Matthias said.
A burning scent lingered but no damage to the "hottie" in front of me. I know, I know, but I couldn't resist.

A&E Kirk

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1664144
#54. No, it's fine. I know you're late. Maybe we can talk tomorrow, but I'm going to be in and out all day."
"That's what he said," she purred.

Dannika Dark

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1707337
#55. I'd seen weirder things than a haunted shoe, but not many.

Richelle Mead

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1809086
#56. Chalk again?" Cal seemed almost disappointed. "Too bad there's no chalk monster."
Penn snorted with amusement. Chalk monster. That was like saying it was a vampire. Everyone knew vampires didn't exist. Zombies who drank blood to stay alive. Ridiculous.

R. Cooper

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1843552
#57. Wrangling the cat into the cage proved interesting, and Josie had several scratches before Clint bent down and let out a menacing growl. The cat took one look at him and with a disdainful sniff, turned to march into the cage.

Eve Langlais

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1850528
#58. He chuckled. She turned to see what was funny and nearly had a heart attack.
He was holding one hot-pink-and-white mug while reading it, the other sitting on the counter: 'Men should be like my curtains, easy to pull and well hung.

Terry Spear

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1851765
#59. Good shot."
"Not really. I was aiming for his balls.

Laurann Dohner

Funny Paranormal Sayings #1855466

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