Funny Officer Famous Quotes & Sayings

List of top 17 famous quotes and sayings about funny officer to read and share with friends on your Facebook, Twitter, blogs.

Top 17 Funny Officer Sayings

#1. There was nowhere I could go that wouldn't be you. - Author: Jeffrey Eugenides
Funny Officer Sayings #912454
#2. I don't believe in any religion apart from doing the will of God. - Author: Catherine Booth
Funny Officer Sayings #1717214
#3. When a court officer suggested quarantine for Nerissa, she grabbed the man's pen and jammed it into the back of his hand, screaming that he was a Crimson Guard witch come to remove her memories and replace them with bird-song.
They decided to skip quarantine after that. - Author: Caitlin Kittredge
Funny Officer Sayings #1685708
#4. 'Come back here, I'm a police officer!' and I shouted back 'No you're not! You're a monster!' - Author: Russell Howard
Funny Officer Sayings #1665934
#5. I show my scars so that others know they can heal. - Author: Rhachelle Nicol'
Funny Officer Sayings #1656426
#6. We have to snatch the sun when we have it, don't we? - Author: Gayle Forman
Funny Officer Sayings #1592045
#7. A traffic policeman stops Sister Bridget for speeding. She pulls into the side of the road and winds down her window. The officer walks round and starts undoing his fly. "Oh dear," she says, "Not the breathalyser again." - Author: Frank Carson
Funny Officer Sayings #1500363
#8. Look at airport security now. What started out as definite racial profiling is now where the computer picks a name. That's why you get a seven-month-old getting a pat down. [Imitates a security officer.] "Check the diapers. They're full." - Author: Robin Williams
Funny Officer Sayings #1381465
#9. Are there any other missing persons living under your roof? Elvis? Jimmy Hoffa? Amelia Earhart? I'd just like full disclosure now, before we go any further. - Author: Maggie Stiefvater
Funny Officer Sayings #1348863
#10. Officer, I know I was going faster than 55MPH, but I wasn't going to be on the
road an hour. - Author: Steven Wright
Funny Officer Sayings #23096
#11. Give a low man one ounce of power and he'll throw ten thousand pounds of bricks on your head. - Author: Lisa See
Funny Officer Sayings #892263
#12. Only a pint at breakfast-time, and a pint and a half at eleven o'clock, and a quart or so at dinner. And then no more till the afternoon; and half a gallon at supper-time. No one can object to that. - Author: R.D. Blackmore
Funny Officer Sayings #826294
#13. The silent horror of Archie's ordeal had been temporarily replaced by the howling, agonising pain of the blood refusing to drain from his penis, the end of which was a deep purple verging on black where Officer Griff had tested how hard it was by using the back of his hand to give it a solid twang. - Author: Dylan Perry
Funny Officer Sayings #531079
#14. It's not just love, or desire, but something profoundly less complex, as unadorned and simple as the vehicle code. Officer laughs, cries. Tearful and giddy, she whales on her demonstrator with what she realizes is joy in her heart. - Author: Daniel Orozco
Funny Officer Sayings #484374
#15. The other night I came home late, and tried to unlock my house with my car keys. I started the house up. So, I drove it around for a while. I was speeding, and a cop pulled me over. He asked where I lived. I said, "Right here, officer." - Author: Steven Wright
Funny Officer Sayings #447066
#16. The best newspapermen I know are those most thrilled by the daily pump of city room excitements; they long fondly for a good murder; they pray that assassinations, wars, catastrophes break on their editions. - Author: Pete Hamill
Funny Officer Sayings #392919
#17. No, officer, I have no idea why I'm wearing this possum costume. I called you what? OH. My bad.
-Nastasya - Author: Cate Tiernan
Funny Officer Sayings #124028

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