Top 78 Funny I'm So Over You Quotes
#1. Sometimes writing is like talking to a stranger who's exactly like yourself in every possible way, only to realize that this stranger is as boring as shit.
Chuck Klosterman
#2. She says screens are the cigarettes of our age. They're toxic, and we're only going to realize the damage they're doing when it's too late.
Sophie Kinsella
#4. Funny, there had been a time when building things was what America did. From massive dams to towering skyscrapers, from mechanized factories to moon rockets, the nation had created, had viewed that as part of the national identity.
Marcus Sakey
#5. Some friends of mine got me a sweater for my birthday. I'd have preferred a moaner or a screamer, but the sweater was OK.
Steven Wright
#6. What I don't like is when I see stuff that I know has had a lot of improv done or is playing around where there's no purpose to the scene other than to just be funny. What you don't want is funny scene, funny scene, funny scene, and now here's the epiphany scene and then the movie's over.
Paul Feig
#7. He can't get broke so long as he is stuffed with money.
L. Frank Baum
#8. Sam gave Captain Suicide a droll stare. How did you die again? Oh wait, I know this. 'I can take 'em. I don't need to wait for reinforcements. I can do it myself.' How'd that work out for you again?
Sherrilyn Kenyon
#9. The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
Will Rogers
#12. Not one word," Kel warned. "Tobe and I have reached an understanding."
Neal's lips twitched. "Why do I feel you did most of the understanding.
Tamora Pierce
#13. It's funny when I hear people complain - particularly about the most fabulous parts of being a designer, like when you're getting ready to work on a show. I don't even know that I'm tired. I could stay up for six days straight! No drugs, no coffee, no nothing. I'm just so excited.
Michael Kors
#14. I've seen people who are not very likeable but hilarious. I think comedians get to a point where they know they're funny, so they don't care - in the sense that they know what they're doing. They have a skill.
Ted Alexandro
#15. It was a small town: Ferguson, Ohio. When you entered there was a big sign and it said, "Welcome to Ferguson. Beware of the Dog." The all-night drugstore closed at noon.
Jackie Vernon
#16. Maybe I think you're cute and funny. Maybe I wanna do what bunnies do with you, if you know what I mean.
Ingrid Michaelson
#17. I see young quarterbacks just coming into the league, and they're throwing screens and layoffs right away. As funny as this might sound, I really learned a lot by going downfield, even in tight coverage.
Peyton Manning
#18. The tires are called wets, because they're used in the wet. And these tires are called slicks, because they're very slick.
Murray Walker
#20. The last time I saw African kids this excited, Madonna was at their school with a net.
Russell Howard
#21. When I was a kid, there was no distinction between a movie about old people or young people. It was either funny or not. It was either entertaining or not. It was either exciting or not. It was either thrilling or not.
Joseph Bologna
#22. I grew up a really shy kid, but I always surrounded myself with a lot funny people. It depends on the day - if I feel like being quiet, I will be. I'm not a complete goofball, though.
Manny Montana
#23. I've always run by the hierarchy of 'If not funny, interesting. If not interesting, hot. If not hot, bizarre. If not bizarre, break something.
Jon Stewart
#24. I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah. He was trying to pull a fast one.
Tim Vine
#25. All of the films I'm doing are young, urban, high-concept, funny films. That's the zone where I'd like to play and have fun in.
Vir Das
#26. I've always said people say on a dramatic show, 'I was crying. It was so emotional when he went and grabbed that little girl from a burning building and handed her over to her mother.' In comedy, the best thing you can say is, 'I think it's funny.'
Bob Newhart
#27. You should write about your life. It's kind of funny. When it's not depressing as hell.
Jeni Decker
#28. I'm not a big prank guy, because I don't like them done to me. I've been on movies sets where one guys goes into his trailer, and then people move the stairs, and he comes out of his trailer, and there's no stairs. That's not funny! I don't want to be that guy!
Terry Crews
#29. As an actor myself, the opportunity to sing and dance and be dramatic and be funny - it's really irresistible to actors. You get to show all sides of your talent.
Elizabeth Banks
#30. Growing up my mother used to tell me I could be anyone I wanted to be. Funny how I always wanted to be me.
Leona Keyoko Pink
#32. The way you might fear a cow sitting down in the middle of the street during rush hour, that's how I fear Canadians.
Maria Semple
#33. And, in a funny way, each death is different and you mourn each death differently and each death brings back the death you mourned earlier and you get into a bit of a pile-up.
Nigella Lawson
#34. The Salton Sea is a huge dead lake south of Palm Springs. There's a town there that's the asshole of the armpit of the world. You'd fit right in.
Neal Shusterman
#35. I guess the breakfast burritos are going to have some extra protein in the morning.
Jon S. Lewis
#36. I give him a skeptical look. "You want to show me your dick?"
"If it'll help convince you." He drains the last drops of his Scotch and stands up. "Come on, let's go.
Kendall Ryan
#37. [Ulysses is] the work of a queasy undergraduate scratching his pimples.
Virginia Woolf
#38. Being funny is a way of being liked and a way of dealing with sadness.
Wendy Wasserstein
#39. You ever go to shop for tuna, and it says "dolphin safe", and you look at it and kind of go, "Yeah, but"-like somehow you think it's not going to be as good? Like, "I want to do the right thing-but it's probably kind of bland without the dolphin."
Louis C.K.
#40. Teaching someone to be funny is like teaching someone to be fast. They're already fast. You're just making them faster.
Ali Farahnakian
#41. My favorite type of pet has always been a dog. They're loyal, kind, and offer endless affection. My friend Eric says, 'The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.' Funny thought.
Brendon Urie
#42. A romantic comedy has to be funny and make you think about life; but the obstacle that has to be overcome is key.
Jennifer Lopez
#43. The stars have a strong effect on our daily shopping lives. Hollywood is astrology's only credible conspiracy.
Bauvard
#44. If I had to pick another career, I'd be an optometrist for potatoes. That's where the money is.
Peter Wisan
#45. I'm a cartoonist, it's what I am at heart, so cartoons take reality and deform it and make it grotesque, you make it funny, but you alter it. If it works, it's based on reality. That's what I try to do.
Terry Gilliam
#47. I was deeply unhappy, but I didn't know it because I was so happy all the time.
Steve Martin
#48. Boys do suck the brains out of smart girls.
K.A. Tucker
#49. Don't mind your make-up, you'd better make your mind up.
Frank Zappa
#50. I know that look. What are you up to, Gwen?"
"What makes you think I'm up to something?"
The Valkyrie snorted. "You're breathing, aren't you?
Jennifer Estep
#51. Billy Crystal knows how to make people laugh. He's got 30 years on stage ... there's no telling him what's funny.
Harold Ramis
#52. The margin of error in astrology is plus or minus one hundred percent.
Calvin Trillin
#53. A man in the crowd asks: Hey Rodney, how'd you get started? Rodney: I was 12 years old, alone in my room, and I got started!
Rodney Dangerfield
#54. It's to paint directly on the canvas without any funny business, as it were, and I use almost pure turpentine to start with, adding oil as I go along until the medium becomes pure oil. I use as little oil as I can possibly help, and that's my method.
Edward Hopper
#55. Every once in a while you definitely have to film someone for half an hour saying something that you do not think is funny because for the previous two hours they said a bunch of stuff that you think is really funny.
Seth Rogen
#56. I saw a door that said exit only. So I entered through it and went up to the guy working there and said "I have good news. You have severely underestimated that door over there. By like a hundred percent."
Demetri Martin
#57. Let me see if I have this quite correct", said Tessa after a pause. "Jessamine found youth the invitation in your hand, so you struck her over the head with a mirror and tied her to her bed?"
Sophie nodded.
"Good Lord,
Cassandra Clare
#58. He bent down so I could hear him over the music. "What are you doing here?" he asked with a hard tone.
Okay. Not the best first line. Something like, you look beautiful, have my babies would have been a little bit better.
R.S. Grey
#59. Suzanne glanced over at her, eyebrow raised. "Is there an anaconda?" she asked, like it had suddenly occurred to her she could be totally wrong.
Tamara should only be so lucky. "No, there's no anaconda, I can promise you that." Not even a garden snake.
Erin McCarthy
#60. If I think of a joke that's really dirty and I think it's funny I'll try it but what I've found over the years is they just don't laugh. It doesn't work coming out of my mouth so it's like they taught me 'don't do that. Don't go that way or you'll lose me.'
Demetri Martin
#61. People deal with models like they are children. They think they can pull one over on you. It's actually funny. I'm always like, I'm about to pull something on you, and you're so focused on thinking I'm dumb, you're not even going to know.
Kate Upton
#62. I had a dream about you last night. I could fly. I was going to use this power to impress you, but you were too heavy to carry, so I won you over with my personality instead
Michael Summers
#63. I got pulled over by a cop, and he said, 'do you know the speed limit here is 55 miles per hour?'. So I said, 'oh, that's OK, I'm not going that far.'
Steven Wright
#64. It's funny, though, because when I first started going to races after we met, I was extremely nervous. It's like being backstage and hoping you don't trip over something or break an amp or accidentally speak into a live microphone, so I was really hesitant.
Ashley Judd
#65. She'd been in labor for nineteen hours; I completely understood why she wanted to pass the buck. 'You are so beautiful,' her husband crooned, holding up her shoulders.
'You are so full of shit,' Lila snarled, but as a contraction settled over her like a net, she bore down and pushed.
Jodi Picoult
#66. I wrote to you for a year and you never wrote back. I rang you over and over again and you would never come to the
phone. What part of that gives the impression that I didn't care?
~Jonah Griggs
Melina Marchetta
#67. So there I was lying in the gutter. A man stopped and asked '"What's the matter? Did you fall over?" So I said "No. I've a bar of toffee in my back pocket and I was just trying to break it."
Chic Murray
#68. Well," I ask, leaning over him, "do you wish to stay?"
"I do."
"And why is that, Cole?" I say, tipping toward him so that our noses nearly brush.
"Well," he says with a smile, "the weather's quite nice.
Victoria Schwab
#69. It's just funny to see him so territorial over a woman. He's practically growling at any man who talks to you, even the married ones. He's never even brought a woman around so I hope you don't mind me saying that it's a little entertaining." Before
Katie Reus
#70. Look here, cousin," Big Country's drawled in the background. "This here's a car. We just got off a plane, and no matter how fast you push this bitch, she ain't gon' fly, so believe me when I say, I refuse to die over some foolishness you call love, not today.
Shay Rucker
#71. When I was small I dreamed of demons. I thought they were under my bed, but you said, it can't be so, you don't get demons our side of the river, the guards won't let them over London Bridge.
Hilary Mantel
#72. And I was all, "Don't be gross, you crustacious fuck. You pull that thing out and I'll pepper-spray you until you fry." (You have to be stern with weenie waggers
I've been exposed to on the bus over seventeen times, so I know.)
Christopher Moore
#73. A beautiful woman moved in next door. So I went over and returned a cup of sugar. She said, "You didn't borrow this." I said, " I will!"
Steven Wright
#74. Kendrick walked over to her purposefully, hauled her up into his arms and gave her a mock frown. "I hunger, wench."
Genevieve put her arms around his neck. "Well? What are you going to hunt us for dinner?"
"I'll slay a few steaks from the freezer."
"You're so brave.
Lynn Kurland
#75. So what indeed! The lesson I myself learned over and over again when teaching at the college and then the prison was the uselessness of information to most people, except as entertainment. If facts weren't funny or scary, or couldn't make you rich, the heck with them.
Kurt Vonnegut
#76. It's funny that these people think I'm so powerful. I've figured out over the years, you can only hurt me if I love you; if I don't know you, I really don't care. There are people who want to kill me and I'm always like, 'Well, get in line, darling.
Conchita Wurst
#77. I really don't have a type. I never had a type. If I could put them all together, it's, like, the most different grouping. So I love when guys are funny. I love guys that are funny and goofy and over the top. And you know, I really like personality.
Kaley Cuoco
#78. I knew a girl so ugly that she was known as a two-bagger. That's when you put a bag over your head in case the bag over her head breaks.
Rodney Dangerfield
Famous Authors
Popular Topics
Scroll to Top