Top 25 Funny Ice Cream Quotes
#1. I had a dream about you. I licked your cone of ice cream. It was envelope flavored.
Melody Sohayegh
#4. I saw a young boy eating an ice cream cone, ... I smashed it in his face. You know that kid is going to remember me when he's 50.
Dane Cook
#5. I had two things I could do: I could run over you, and I could put a good stiff arm on you. That was about it.
Earl Campbell
#6. So I went down my local ice-cream shop, and said 'I want to buy an ice-cream'. He said Hundreds & thousands?' I said 'We'll start with one.' He said 'Knickerbocker glory?' I said 'I do get a certain amount of freedom in these trousers, yes.'
Tim Vine
#7. I think so. I want a hamburger and a hot dog." I paused. "And ice cream in one of those waffle cones. And - and I want to see the big kitties.
Jennifer L. Armentrout
#8. Nonsense! I have merely come to terms with the fact that I am perfect, and I have decided life must go on, and I must learn to live with myself ...
C.N. Faust
#9. If you think of ice cream, it (Helvetica) is a cheap, nasty, supermarket brand made of water, substitutes and vegetable fats. The texture is wrong and it leaves a little bit of a funny aftertaste.
Bruno Maag
#10. I take a sip of my beer, and it's - I mean, it's just astonishingly disgusting. I don't think I was expecting it to taste like ice cream, but holy fucking hell. People lie and get fake IDs and sneak into bars, and for this? I honestly think I'd rather make out with Bieber. The dog. Or Justin.
Becky Albertalli
#11. Women who are interested in pursuing bachelor's and master's degrees - especially in STEM fields - benefit from starting at a community college. They offer an affordable education, with flexible schedules and degrees close to home.
Jill Biden
#12. Where's the ice cream?"
"In the oven.
E.L. James
#13. Can I buy you an ice cream beforeI take you home? I feel like it's the least I can do after scaring your shirt off.
Tamara Summers
#14. But as Ana pulled away on a west-bound highway with a werewolf riding shotgun and her thirst for blood calling yet again, she had this thought: Maybe a Misfit could never be normal, no matter how badly it wanted to.
Ayul Hendricks-Levy
#15. She never wanted an extravagant life-- only one filled with simple joys like children, family, friendship, good books, funny jokes, and a pint of mint chocolate chip ice cream.
S.A. Huchton
#16. If we understood ourselves better we would damage ourselves less.
James Baldwin
#17. Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with hundreds and thousands. Police say that he topped himself.
Tommy Cooper
#18. Ignorance and its hand-maidens, prejudice, intolerance, suspicion of our fellowman, breed dictators and breed wars.
Harry S. Truman
#19. I hope the next time you get a double-decker strawberry ice-cream cone the ice cream part falls off the cone and lands in Australia.
Judith Viorst
#20. And what the hell does that even mean? Why would you serve food for thoughgs, and what kind of food? If you serve spinach, do you get healthy thoughts? If it's ice cream and candy, it is fun thoughts? Why do we say stupid things?
J.D. Robb
#22. Nothing in life is fun for the whole family. There are no massage parlors with ice cream and free jewelry.
Jerry Seinfeld
#23. I believe the technical term is "space cadet." But she is the kind of space cadet many people aspire to be. My sister is fully alive to each moment and each observation.
Susan Juby
#24. How complicated can ice cream flavors be? How much can you put in there? I mean, when the flavor's something like banana ice cream with caramel, fudge chunks, cheddar goldfish and pennies - you've got to draw a line there.
Marc Maron
#25. The elevator shaft was a kind of heat sink. Hot food was cold by the time it arrived. Cold food got colder. No one knew what would happen to ice cream, but it would probably involve some rewriting of the laws of thermodynamics.
Terry Pratchett
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