Top 29 Funny Harry Potter Quotes

#1. And to die with the Warrior's Prayer on his lips. For, 'Yes', he had sighed on his dying breath, and all knew that was the ultimate prayer one could offer to life. Acceptance.

Robin Hobb

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #28673
#2. Listen, Harr,y can I have a go on it? Can I?"
"I don't think anyone should ride that broom just yet!" said Hermoine shrilly.
Harry and Ron looked at her.
"What d'you think Harry's going to do with it - sweep the floor?" said Ron.

J.K. Rowling

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #201617
#3. Don't worry. You're just as sane as I am
-Luna Lovegood

J.K. Rowling

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #327008
#4. Wow, we're identical!

J.K. Rowling

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #347438
#5. It's so Hogwarts.

Stephanie Perkins

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #464136
#6. I remember saying in college that I would never do commercials.

Rob Corddry

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #555755
#7. There is thin line between fun and disrespect to a language. Poking once or twice is fun but excess is disrespect.

Pankaj Gupta

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #610382
#8. I am not forgotten, you know, no, I still receive a very great deal of fan mail.
... Gladys Gudgeon writes weekly ... I just wish I knew why ... "
He paused, looking faintly puzzled, then beamed again and returned to his signing with renewed vigor. "I suspect it is simply my good looks ...

J.K. Rowling

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #624554
#9. I wasn't actually very naturally good at economics. My brain doesn't work very well, in terms of mathematics.

Brit Marling

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #708021
#10. What's a dementor?"
I mean, I can't even. "Nora, you are no longer my sister."
"So it's some Harry Potter thing," she says.

Becky Albertalli

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #756278
#11. The greenhouse effect is something you can observe experimentally - and most people have observed the greenhouse effect themselves, in greenhouses. Yes?

Nicholas Stern

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #760571
#12. Through the gaps in the books, Ryan could see someone in the next aisle over, moving slowly. Someone in black. Someone whistling. Ryan recognized the tune. It was the theme music to Harry Potter.

Derek Landy

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #763673
#13. Yer a wizard, Harry!

J.K. Rowling

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #904342
#14. Ty burst out laughing when he saw it. "Is that a travel pack of lube? I didn't even know they made those."
Zane grinned. "Where the hell have you been buying your lube?

Madeleine Urban

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #919765
#15. Fred and George exchanged looks.
"You don't mind if we don't kiss you, do you, Ron?" said Fred in a falsely anxious voice.
"We could curtsy, if you like," said George.
"Oh, shut up," said Ron, scowling at them.

J.K. Rowling

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #1026628
#16. I don't like to not call a spade a spade.

Marc Andreessen

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #1037015
#17. The problem is we need much more moral content.

Cornel West

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #1280717
#18. An empire is an immense egotism.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #1343891
#19. I feel like Harry Potter just put liquid luck in my butterbeer before Quidditch practice.

Jillian Dodd

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #1427591
#20. Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

Ambrose Bierce

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #1477307
#21. But you would think, wouldn't you, that getting hit forty-five times in the neck with a blunt axe would qualify you to join the Headless Hunt? - Sir Nicholas de Mimsy

J.K. Rowling

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #1487919
#22. Why would I go looking for someone I know wants to kill me?

J.K. Rowling

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #1502407
#23. Zen cuts straight through the Quidditch match in progress and almost gets taken down by a Beater hurling a Nerf quaffle right at his machopartes.

Megan McCafferty

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #1508747
#24. You think that killing people will make them like you more, but it doesn't,it just makes them dead.

Joe Walker

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #1659544
#25. I made a birdhouse," he said confidently. "And I painted it to look like Hogwarts.

Megan Duke

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #1683351
#26. Eternity: what a waste of time.

Natalie Clifford Barney

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #1715066
#27. Is it true you shouted at Professor Umbridge?'
'Yes,' said Harry.
'You called her a liar?'
'Yes.'
'You told her He Who Must Not Be Named is back?'
'Yes.'
Professor McGonagall sat down behind her desk, watching Harry closely. Then she said, 'Have a biscuit, Potter.

J.K. Rowling

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #1771656
#28. Parvati positively beamed. Harry could tell that she was feeling guilty for having laughed at Hermione in Transfiguration. He looked around and saw that Hermione was beaming back, if possible even more brightly. Girls were very strange sometimes.

J.K. Rowling

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #1801794
#29. Malfoy glanced around. Harry knew he was checking for signs of teachers. Then he looked back at Harry and said in a low voice, "You're dead, Potter."
Harry raised his eyebrows. "Funny," he said, "you'd think I'd have stopped walking around ...

J.K. Rowling

Funny Harry Potter Quotes #1827151

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