Top 27 Funny Guns Quotes
#3. Two fish in a tank, one says to the other - you drive I'll man the guns.
Tommy Cooper
#4. The logic of science was infallible, and if the scientists were sometimes mistaken, this was assumed to be only from their mistaking its rules.
Robert M. Pirsig
#5. Maybe I shouldn't scare off my date so quickly by shooting guns and telling stories about vomit, but, hey, the sooner he knows the real me, the better.
Vicki Lesage
#6. We drove in silence for a while.
"Can I have a gun?" I asked.
"No!"
"Just a little one? For my handbag? It'll give me some street cred with the client."
"No! No! No!"
His clenched fists pounded the steering wheel with each word.
- heller 1
J.D. Nixon
#7. Step one, accept she was a damn boss. Step two, hide all the knives, guns, and maybe the pillows, too.
J.J. McAvoy
#8. White man makes guns? No problem. Black rapper says "gun"? Congressional hearing.
Chris Rock
#9. I was glad to get in that stall. It was a funny feeling, being naked and fighting a man with a gun. I didn't like it. I felt the bullets would hurt more, naked.
Jonathan Latimer
#10. He shook his head and looked away, as if he was giving himself a firm lecture only he could here.
Roni Loren
#11. As I lay, a pink, dreamlike glow seeped into the room, gradually turning a bright, chemical red. The light inched towards the bed, slowly picking out our two bodies - developing us, I thought, the way photographs used to be made - until it was daylight and everything had its normal definition.
Olivia Sudjic
#12. I think guns are just a symbolic substitute for male genitalia, and I'm okay in that respect." "Fine. If they get in the house, you can whack them with your genitals.
J.A. Konrath
#13. Even though I'm not with their mother, it's important for my kids to see adults in a committed and happy relationship. They need to see a strong relationship. You don't have to settle.
Michael Strahan
#14. The shooting of the guns, that was kind of funny, because rolling a cigarette and shooting a gun aren't like normal things for a 13-year old girl!
Hailee Steinfeld
#15. Poor bastards," Cole said, his gaze still on the stars. "They must get pretty tired of watching us make the same damn mistakes all the time.
Maggie Stiefvater
#16. How do you know they are Hunters?" Lucien asked.
"They had guns and knives strapped to their bodies, and I saw the mark of infinity on one of their wrists." Branding themselves was foolish, if you asked him. Like putting a neon sign around their necks that read 'Shoot here'.
Gena Showalter
#17. They say if you outlaw guns, only outlaws will have guns. Well, those are precisely the people who need them!
George Carlin
#18. On how to make the game more exciting - Eliminate the referees, raise the basket four feet, double the size of the basketball, limit the height of the players to 5 feet 9 inches, bring back the centre jump, allow taxi drivers in for free and allow the players to carry guns.
Al McGuire
#19. It's not the vote women need, we should be armed.
Edna O'Brien
#20. Money, Gun and Lie can solve almost all the problems.
Amit Kalantri
#21. Adolescence is a kind of slavery cleverly disguised as freedom.
Mardy Grothe
#22. Like the NRA says, it's better to have a machine gun and not need it than to need a machine gun and not have it.
John Sandford
#23. That's the funny thing about guns; even untrained hands can feel powerful using them. But take that gun away and you're left with nothing but a coward whose only skill is how to blindly pull a trigger.
Jennifer Wilson
#24. What?"
"Nothing." He laughed."You were really hungry."
"I don't need to defend my eating to anyone.And just so you know,when I'm done with this,I plan to eat three whole cookies."
"Whoa." He held up his hands."Now you're pulling out the big guns."
"I don't mess around.
Tristi Pinkston
#25. Set we forward; let
A Roman and a British ensign wave
Friendly together. So through Lud's town march,
And in the temple of the great Jupiter
Our peace we'll ratify, seal it with feasts.
Set on there! Never was a war did cease,
Ere bloody hands were washed, with such a peace.
William Shakespeare
#26. I have never been especially impressed by the heroics of people convinced they are about to change the world. I am more awed by those who struggle to make one small difference.
Ellen Goodman
#27. When you think about it, being trained by a Gladiator is almost as good as being trained by the SAS.
Dave Franklin
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