Top 81 Funny Dream Sayings

#1. Brooke?" he finally found the sense to ask. "What are you doing here?"
"I need a gun."
This was not how his dream was supposed to go.

Shannon K. Butcher

Funny Dream Sayings #24025
#2. I had a dream about you. You were lost in a daydream, when I walked in and you began screaming. But I know that could never actually happen. In real life I only enter people's nightmares.

Bauvard

Funny Dream Sayings #27418
#3. It takes the same effort to dream small or dream big. Dream big!

Mani Maran

Funny Dream Sayings #34663
#4. I had a dream about you. I licked your cone of ice cream. It was envelope flavored.

Melody Sohayegh

Funny Dream Sayings #42008
#5. What I find relatively funny is that I'm not a model. I'm five foot six and a half; I have absolutely no dream or desire to be a model, I don't live for fashion. But when an opportunity comes your way very early in your career, like Burberry, you do it.

Sophie Kennedy Clark

Funny Dream Sayings #49777
#6. Life is an absolute Dream... then I wake up.

Jane

Funny Dream Sayings #101719
#7. I had a dream about you last night ... Well I say dream I mean nightmare ... you were a Yankee fan.

Nicole McKay

Funny Dream Sayings #159997
#8. I had a dream about you last night.
We moved into a cabin in the countryside.
I couldn't handle the spiders.
You couldn't handle my drama.
I moved back to the city.

Michael Summers

Funny Dream Sayings #162063
#9. I had a dream about you last night ... shortly after I woke up screaming in terror.

Amy Summers

Funny Dream Sayings #164610
#10. I had a dream about you. We installed Dr. Robert Jarvik's artificial heart in a mannequin and brought it to life, only to later kill it because a creature that's all fake heart and no brain is what's commonly called a "politician," and must be destroyed.

Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Funny Dream Sayings #175485
#11. It's strange how interesting your dreams are, but when someone tries to tell you their dream you're just like "WHATEVER! Why don't you send me an e-mail so I can delete it?"

Jim Gaffigan

Funny Dream Sayings #228827
#12. Asia is an entertainment, Europe is a dream, America is an imprisonment and Rest is a nightmare.

Santosh Kalwar

Funny Dream Sayings #233665
#13. A good approach is to allow one dream per novel. Then, in the final revision, go back and get rid of that, too.

Howard Mittelmark

Funny Dream Sayings #260623
#14. How much of my fever-induced dream was real? I felt safe assuming that my time as a bee was fiction, as well as a few mythological animals that I swear I'd seen. Then I'd lived on the sun with aliens.

Cora Carmack

Funny Dream Sayings #272737
#15. I had a dream about you. You were an escalator, and I was a flight of stairs. You thought I was a Luddite, and I thought I was as ostrich, because I hadn't figured out how to put the fly in flight. One day you broke down, and then you saw that you and I weren't so different after all.

Dora J. Arod

Funny Dream Sayings #283539
#16. Vig walked back to his truck. That's when Stieg drily asked, "Do you need another minute to blush coquettishly and dream about your perfect white wedding?"
As Vig walked around the front of his vehicle, he grabbed Stieg by the hair and slammed him face-first into the hood.

Shelly Laurenston

Funny Dream Sayings #286503
#17. I had a dream about you. We were married and I walked into the room to see you in my new black dress and high heels and I said "That's not what I meant when I said I bought them for you".

Georgia Saratsioti

Funny Dream Sayings #302008
#18. I had a dream about you last night. We stopped telling each other about our dreams when we realized we were still inside them.

Michael Summers

Funny Dream Sayings #362403
#19. How do you do it?" I asked. "You had five minutes to get ready."
"Always prepared." Vee shot me a grin. "I'm a Boy Scout's dream.

Becca Fitzpatrick

Funny Dream Sayings #362825
#20. I have a dream, and a plan, to combine the commercial possibilities of Valentine's Day with the substance and meaning of black history month. I call it: Blackentine's Day.

Mo Rocca

Funny Dream Sayings #378062
#21. I had a dream about you. At first you were a mannequin, and I was a fashion designer. Then, inexplicably, we switched roles and I became the mannequin. But instead of putting clothes on me, you laughed at my nakedness, and you sold me to the owner of a sex shop.

Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Funny Dream Sayings #417665
#22. Every morning I hear the alarm, it's like "BEEP BEEP BEEP" For second I'm like, "I could get used to that, just dream I'm in a techno club, or something."

Jim Gaffigan

Funny Dream Sayings #426947
#23. I had a dream about you. You were on a bike going 70 miles an hour, I could see you approaching my car in the mirror. You were trying to say something so, I jumped on the brakes as hard as I could, I guess I forgot I had tied your bike on my bumper.

Georgia Saratsioti

Funny Dream Sayings #481749
#24. Monstress is an exhilarating rollercoaster of a book. Deeply funny, heartbreaking, hopeful, philosophical, bawdy, and wise, Lysley Tenorio's stories, written from the underbelly of the American Dream, present one brilliant portrait after another.

Sabina Murray

Funny Dream Sayings #512902
#25. I love to make things. If I have some free time and you have a dollar and a dream and you are making something funny and cool I'd love to be a part of it.

Daniel Franzese

Funny Dream Sayings #528121
#26. I had a dream about you last night. I could fly. I was going to use this power to impress you, but you were too heavy to carry, so I won you over with my personality instead

Michael Summers

Funny Dream Sayings #573469
#27. I didn't dream about you last night. I woke up in fear.

Michael Summers

Funny Dream Sayings #573794
#28. So I went to the Doctor's yesterday. He said, "What appears to be the problem?" I said, "I keep having this dream, night after night, beautiful girls rushing towards me and I keep pushing them away." He said, "How can I help?" I said: "Break my arms."

Tommy Cooper

Funny Dream Sayings #613107
#29. I had a dream about you last night. The champagne was non-alcoholic. You didn't notice, and laughed at my jokes anyway.

Michael Summers

Funny Dream Sayings #630171
#30. And off we go, out onto the highway looking for a little fun. Perhaps a flatbed truck loaded with human cadavers will explode in front of a Star Trek reunion. One can only dream and hope.

George Carlin

Funny Dream Sayings #687406
#31. You always dream about being on a baseball card. It's kind of funny when you finally see it.

Alex Rodriguez

Funny Dream Sayings #695263
#32. I had a dream about you last night ... I was a brick and you were a blanket. Damn that improbability drive.

Nicole McKay

Funny Dream Sayings #713596
#33. Does anyone else day dream about what it would be like if specific age groups just dropped dead all across the world?

Christy Leigh Stewart

Funny Dream Sayings #744638
#34. Never abandon your dreams. You may regret it for the rest of your life.

Fabiola Gianotti

Funny Dream Sayings #759080
#35. It's not all about love. That's half of it ... The other half is about that moment you have with yourself when you're looking in the mirror, and you just go, 'Oh man. I'm going to compromise my dreams, get fat, sick, old and die someday. I kind of want to have someone around for that.'

Marc Maron

Funny Dream Sayings #770432
#36. I had a dream about you last night. Eons ago, we created a Universe, then sat back and watched miniature versions of ourselves try to make all the same mistakes we did.

Michael Summers

Funny Dream Sayings #773543
#37. If you're trapped in the dream of the Other, you're fucked.

Gilles Deleuze

Funny Dream Sayings #775179
#38. This funny thing we call love, how simple it may seem. To say it is sometimes enough but to feel it is a dream.

Raneem Kayyali

Funny Dream Sayings #804099
#39. I had a dream about you last night. It wasn't until after you sold me the talking car, I realized you were the world's best ventriloquist.

Michael Summers

Funny Dream Sayings #807243
#40. All you do is eat. You eat, then you start thinking about the next thing you're going to eat."
"Eating is the only thing that breaks the monotony," Scotty said.
Seth's eyebrows shot up. "This isn't monotony. This is the fucking dream."
"It will be," Scotty said. "When I have some yogurt.

Rainbow Rowell

Funny Dream Sayings #818669
#41. Disney Resort and World and Compound, a place where your dreams really do come true, if you dream about having people wearing enormous cartoon-animal heads come around to your restaurant table and act whimsical and refuse to go away until you laugh with delight.

Dave Barry

Funny Dream Sayings #879981
#42. He rolled onto his back and tried to remember the dream he had been having. It had been a good one. There had been a flying motorcycle in it. He had a funny feeling he'd had the same dream before.

J.K. Rowling

Funny Dream Sayings #909605
#43. I had a dream about you. We were ice fishing in my freezer. I caught a few cold beers, and you wondered if we should drink them, or throw them back because they were babies.

Dora J. Arod

Funny Dream Sayings #931767
#44. My parents always told me to be myself. I was always funny and silly as a kid. And I would always make them laugh. And they always told me to dream big and follow those dreams.

Richard Simmons

Funny Dream Sayings #966805
#45. Every dream is a prophecy: every jest is an earnest in the womb of Time.

George Bernard Shaw

Funny Dream Sayings #987315
#46. The American Dream is not to own your own home, but to get your kids out of it.

Dick Armey

Funny Dream Sayings #1001351
#47. I dream of acting with Kevin Costner. I would love to do a movie with him. Not something funny, but a dramatic role.

Bill Engvall

Funny Dream Sayings #1007087
#48. I had a dream about you. You looked like you, but you also looked like a mannequin. And I looked like me, but I also looked like a mannequin. Between the two of us, we were too fake even for Hollywood. And as such, we were forced to reside in Washington DC.

Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Funny Dream Sayings #1007486
#49. A dreamcatcher works, if your dream is to be gay.

Demetri Martin

Funny Dream Sayings #1040286
#50. To me, the movie is more funny if, at the same time, you can think a little bit or dream a little bit.

Quentin Dupieux

Funny Dream Sayings #1049122
#51. I dream of moving to India, or Pakistan, and becoming a cabdriver.

Zach Galifianakis

Funny Dream Sayings #1049466
#52. I had a dream about you. You were wearing Sylvester Stallone's sneer as pants, but his lips were saggy on your legs, so you had to wear a mustache as a belt.

Dora J. Arod

Funny Dream Sayings #1065481
#53. I had a dream about you. We were in a canoe, and we were paddling across the desert. You said you were thirsty, and I pointed to the sand that surrounded us and said, "No, I will not urinate in your mouth." At that point I woke up, because I realized I really had to pee - and get a drink of water.

Dora J. Arod

Funny Dream Sayings #1089289
#54. I had a dream about you last night ... you were a giant slinky and I watched you fall down the stairs.

Amy Summers

Funny Dream Sayings #1116909
#55. I dream of starting a three-man country trio called the Chixie Dicks.

Zach Galifianakis

Funny Dream Sayings #1118998
#56. I had a dream about you last night. We watched pornography together, but purely for the storyline.

Michael Summers

Funny Dream Sayings #1127901
#57. It was going to be our job to annoy someone?"
"I know - it's a dream come true!

Joel N. Ross

Funny Dream Sayings #1207317
#58. I had a dream about you. We couldn't decide on a sunrise. You wanted a tan, I only cared about the view. Then World War III fulfilled both our desires.

Bauvard

Funny Dream Sayings #1209450
#59. In this funny debut, flashy Filipino fashion designer Boy Hernandez sees his American dream become a nightmare when he's ensnared in a terrorist plot and shipped to Guantanamo. Gilvarry nails the couture scene, but Boy's rough journey from Manolo to Gitmo is no joke.

Andrew Abrahams

Funny Dream Sayings #1227308
#60. Gansey held Ronan's arm a second longer to make sure he hadn't mistaken his meaning, and then dropped it and turned to Adam. "Were you just going to stand there?"
"Yeah," replied Adam.
"Decent of you," Gansey said.
There was no heat in Adam's reply. "I can't kill his demons.

Maggie Stiefvater

Funny Dream Sayings #1238054
#61. This is so funny," said Ellen, noticing the seating arrangement. "Isn't this funny? Tom, come sit next to Robin. Griffin, sit next to Laura."
I stood up and sat next to Robin while Griffin brought his chair over to Laura.
"That's better," said Ellen. "Isn't that better?

Daniel Amory

Funny Dream Sayings #1240807
#62. A girl can dream can't she? My new life plan is to stumble into every office of a CEO until I find a Christian Grey.

Sophie Monroe

Funny Dream Sayings #1244608
#63. That's why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it.

George Carlin

Funny Dream Sayings #1264436
#64. So what, then? Pete? Clyde?"
Cabel rolls over, pretending to sleep.
"It's Fred, isn't it?"
"Janie. Stop."
"You named your thing Janie?" She giggles.
Cabel groans deeply. "Go to sleep.

Lisa McMann

Funny Dream Sayings #1265666
#65. We told Stanley Roberts to go on a water diet, and Lake Superior disappeared. Pat Williams When Xavier McDaniel plays against Orlando Wooldridge, it's a coach's dream - X vs O.

Mychal Thompson

Funny Dream Sayings #1408691
#66. A man commented to his lunch companion: My wife had a funny dream last night. She dreamed she'd married a millionaire. You're lucky, sighed the companion. My wife dreams that in the daytime.

Sam Ewing

Funny Dream Sayings #1418492
#67. You know when you mix butt and Angel in the same sentence, it becomes an insult," I say and take a big gulp from the can. With his back to me, he says, "Trust me, I would never dream of insulting your butt. I'm sure it's better than anything I'm cooking out here.

Rucy Ban

Funny Dream Sayings #1459208
#68. Working with Dav Pilkey was a dream come true. Dav is incredibly funny, and he's been a hero of mine for a long time. It was great bringing the 'Wimpy Kid' and 'Captain Underpants' worlds together!

Jeff Kinney

Funny Dream Sayings #1498326
#69. Life is so funny sometimes that you just have to laugh.

Rebecca McNutt

Funny Dream Sayings #1519018
#70. I'm very physical. I'm extremely active, and I would love to do something a little more sexy and dangerous, a la Sophia Loren, or funny and humorous, a la Woody Allen. Getting to do things along those lines would be extremely wicked and a dream come true.

Azita Ghanizada

Funny Dream Sayings #1530691
#71. I had a dream about you. You were being hung. I had a sword in one hand and a stool in the other. I couldn't decide which one to use, so I stood on the stool and threw myself on the sword. It was the least I could do to protest capital punishment.

Bauvard

Funny Dream Sayings #1549620
#72. The smart and funny write Nathan Rabin coined the term Manic Pixie Dream Girl to describe a version of this archetype after seeing Kristen Dunst in the movie Elizabethtown.

Mindy Kaling

Funny Dream Sayings #1630820
#73. I had a dream about you. You suggested to split the profits, so I did. I threw one half in the furnace to power the steam engine, and the other half in the air to distract our pursuers.

Bauvard

Funny Dream Sayings #1676335
#74. Biggest dream?" I was proud of this one because I knew it would stump him. It required forethought.
"Kiss you."
"That's not funny," I said, holding his eyes, grateful I didn't stutter.
"No, but it made you blush.

Becca Fitzpatrick

Funny Dream Sayings #1714414
#75. The first time I saw a mermaid in my dream, and she looked so real...THAT.'s fishy!!

Ana Claudia Antunes

Funny Dream Sayings #1734775
#76. I was one of Them: the Strange Ones. The Funny People. The Odd Tribes of autograph collectors and photographers. The Ones who waited through long days and nights, who used other people's dreams for their lives.

Ray Bradbury

Funny Dream Sayings #1757620
#77. He'd never dreamed they could ever be together again after what had happened so long ago, but life is funny, sometimes. The painful past can heal and can even open up into a life you'd never dared to dream of.

Miranda Liasson

Funny Dream Sayings #1765027
#78. When I was growing up we didn't have a massive house and there were five women running around, so my dad and I had to stick together!

Louis Tomlinson

Funny Dream Sayings #1841126
#79. I had a dream about you last night ... Unfortunately, it wasn't a dream.

Amy Summers

Funny Dream Sayings #1852927
#80. I had a dream about you. I was sitting on your couch, relating my succession of ideas on subconscious influence. I asked you what they meant, and you told me that free associations were a bad way to advance my political career.

Bauvard

Funny Dream Sayings #1865924
#81. Make a sex tape, upload it, get on a reality show, release a perfume, retire. That's the new American dream.

Natasha Leggero

Funny Dream Sayings #1875039

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