Top 14 Funny Christmas Time Quotes
#1. My feelings are too loud for words and too shy for the world.
Dejan Stojanovic
#2. I do honour the very flea of his dog.
Ben Jonson
#3. I've learned to accept birth and death ... but sometimes I still worry about what lies between.
Ashleigh Brilliant
#4. Oh. Momma told me not to tell you that your bed squeaks. But I think you know, 'cause I could hear it this morning. Jake dropped his fork. Tor, for the first time Jake had ever seen, turned scarlet. Maureen looked at them both and sighed. Christmas is always so interesting with you, Mark.
Chris Owen
#5. I say if a novelty Christmas song is funny one time, then it is funny every time. - Calvin
Bill Watterson
#6. What the hell? Ian asked, holding his hands over the front of his Christmas briefs. Sara had ordered them from the Internet, and he'd worn them to please her. Too bad there hadn't been enough time for the underwear to meet with an unfortunate accident. A lot could be blamed on a washing machine.
Rose Wynters
#8. At Christmas time I sat on Santa's lap. His fly was open ! Boy what a present he gave me !
Rodney Dangerfield
#10. The reality of the human condition is such that, according to Porter (and I agree), we must "salvage our fragments of happiness" out of life's inevitable sufferings.
Gary L. Thomas
#11. It's funny to think that Christmas - a time known for its joyful togetherness - can be the loneliest time of the year for some.
Giovanna Fletcher
#12. I had a lot of times with Wales as well when we were getting beat - and beaten well - and you learn to deal with it. You learn that next time it happens, you roll your sleeves up and give everything for the team.
Gary Speed
#13. If you don't give up, you will succeed. But you don't have to believe me; you have to believe yourself.
Ben Tolosa
#14. Santa Claus has nothing to do with it," the latke said. "Christmas and Hanukah are completely different things."
"But different things can often blend together," said the pine tree. "Let me tell you a funny story about pagan rituals.
Lemony Snicket
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