Funny Bench Sayings

#1. Europe is scooters. Europe is five young people on one bench sharing a chocolate bar. Their idea of entertainment and fun is so much different than ours, which is exactly why a movie about them would be funny.

Mike Myers

#2. I pitched a storyline, and as far as I know it's been picked up. It's for the third and final episode I'm contracted to do. But I can't give any spoilers.

Corin Nemec

#3. Leo took out a pen and autographed the arm of one of the nymphs. Narcissus is a loser! He's so weak, he can't bench-press a Kleenex. He's so lame, when you look up lame on Wikipedia, it's got a picture of Narcissus - only the picture's so ugly, no one ever checks it out.

Rick Riordan

#4. A constitution, intended to
endure for ages to come, and
consequently, to be adapted to the
various crises of human affairs.

John Marshall

#5. My course, navigating the sea of life, begins with a goal sighted in the lens of my telescope.

Celeste Cooper

#6. It's not too bad when the sun's out, but the sun only comes out when it feels like coming out.

J.D. Salinger

#7. Puppies are cute. I'm fierce!"
"Yeah!" Evelyn snorted. "Romas says you're as fierce as a kitten."
"A kitten?" Kiera's tone grew more hurt. "I'm not afraid of him, just because he's twelve feet tall and can bench press me with his toes. It's not nice of him to say that

Lizzy Ford

#8. Everyone has their wings, it just so happens that mine are black.

Destiny-Angel King

#9. To be sitting on the bench behind somebody who only started to play when he was 30 is not funny.

Jens Lehmann

#10. I became alcoholic at around age of 13 or 14. I was full-blown. Every day we would hide the alcohol, stealing from stores or stealing it from our parents and hiding out in dirt fields and drinking it before school and after school.

Reginald Arvizu

#11. I'm not big on the pasty because they say the pastry in the pasty can bring on indigestion.

Terry Wogan