Crack Me Up Funny Famous Quotes & Sayings

List of top 37 famous quotes and sayings about crack me up funny to read and share with friends on your Facebook, Twitter, blogs.

Top 37 Crack Me Up Funny Quotes

#1. Oh Lola's Boobs,' he says into my chest, 'I wish we knew each other better.'
I crack up laughing.
'What's that you say?' he jokes, putting his ear to my right breast. 'You wish you could come out to play more often but Lola doesn't let you? Well, that's a shame. - Author: Bianca Giovanni
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #86437
#2. He's a very funny and very nice man. When you read the script, you want to stick with it. But when you're with Eddie Murphy you've got to improvise. He's always making jokes and making me crack up when the camera's on. - Author: Raven-Symone
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #127933
#3. Passion is of the nature of seed, and finds nourishment within, tending to a predominance which determines all currents towards itself, and makes the whole life its tributary. - Author: George Eliot
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #152834
#4. Other crack teams get bat boomerangs and wall-climbing powers; we get Aquatruck. - Author: Cassandra Clare
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #209653
#5. I like it when very little children think for themselves, because they do not have access to car keys or credit cards or crack pipes, but they have some really funny lines. - Author: Roseanne Barr
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #244583
#6. America ... has ever had, and I trust she ever will have, my honest exertions to promote her interest. I cannot hope that my services have been the best; but my heart tells me they have been the best that I could render. - Author: George Washington
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #328387
#7. I'm into menswear slacks that are comfortable. - Author: Rachel Bilson
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #429122
#8. But then again, they
were like baby Einsteins on crack. - Author: Jennifer L. Armentrout
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #431971
#9. I would never do crack ... I would never do a drug named after a part of my own ass, okay? - Author: Denis Leary
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #457350
#10. At home the great delight is to see the clover and grass now growing on places that were bare when we came. These small healings of the ground are my model accomplishment-everything else I do must aspire to that. While I was at that work the world gained with every move I made, and I harmed nothing. - Author: Wendell Berry
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #459834
#11. There is something human about the way people react to and identify with suffering. There's a lot more empathy in the world than we perhaps realize. - Author: Edwidge Danticat
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #572479
#12. Life is a gamble, we scramble for money,
I might crack a smile, but ain't a damn thing funny. - Author: Prodigy
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #574002
#13. Do you know what the good side of crack is? If you're up at the right hour, you can get a VCR for $1.50. You can furnish your whole house for $10.95. - Author: Chris Rock
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #599576
#14. A man walked into a shop and asked, "How much are your eggs?" He said "£1.40 a dozen". He then asked: "How much are your cracked ones?" He said: "35p". He said: "Crack us four dozen." - Author: Frank Carson
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #614451
#15. Did you hear about the rose that grew from a crack in the concrete? Proving nature's laws wrong, it learned to walk without having feet. Funny, it seems to by keeping it's dreams; it learned to breathe fresh air. Long live the rose that grew from concrete when no one else even cared. - Author: Tupac Shakur
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #656448
#16. Who's there?"
"The scratcher of your itch," he said.
She opened the door a crack and stuck her nose out. "Was that supposed to be romantic? - Author: Jill Shalvis
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #720850
#17. Someday you'll meet people who are actually on crack and you won't think that's a super funny thing to say. - Author: Patrick Stump
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #748089
#18. Ultimately, you are defined by your kindness, compassion, passion, and choice. - Author: Debasish Mridha
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #796238
#19. Bricks are independent but can work well with other, tough to crack, fiercely loyal and put in the right spot will hold anything and everything that you've ever held dear with the greatest of ease. - Author: Nicole McKay
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #824691
#20. Time will pass and seasons will come and go. - Author: Roy Bean
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #879697
#21. I hope you slip in a puddle of AIDS and crack your head open - Author: Jim Norton
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #963071
#22. Why do we have to humiliate someone to crack a joke??? Do what u would like people to do with u.. - Author: Honeya
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #993754
#23. Only thing I am testing positive for is Pasta or Cheese. - Author: Joe Lauzon
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #1066778
#24. The trouble with being too careful about your wishes, though, was that you could end up with a wish so shapeless that it could come true and you wouldn't even know it, or it wouldn't matter. - Author: Lynne Rae Perkins
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #1163817
#25. I hate when someone keep on asking me to guess even after I failed to crack twice! - Author: Nelson Jack
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #1241997
#26. Is this the 5:00 Free Crack Giveaway? - Author: Dave Chappelle
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #1277950
#27. One thing that's really delightful is my books tend to attract people who are funny, so I get the benefit of people writing me with things that crack me up. - Author: Christopher Moore
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #1328387
#28. He is the only man she has ever loved, and he has dumped her like ballast. She needs to find an explanation that does not make her a fool and him an animal, but every thought of him is a knife turning in the wound love made. - Author: Mark Haddon
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #1365476
#29. I admired the work ethic of the cowboys I read about. The idea of these young people taking on this much responsibility was impressive. I would like modern readers to have an appreciation of this. - Author: Walter Dean Myers
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #1449128
#30. For decades, many therapists have been attempting to help abusive men change by guiding them in identifying and expressing feelings. Alas, this well-meaning but misguided approach actually feeds the abuser's selfish focus on himself, which is an important force driving his abusiveness. - Author: Lundy Bancroft
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #1541526
#31. I love doing comedy. I find comedy quite hard work. Comedy's underrated, I think, by actors, you know? It's difficult to get it right and get it funny. I really enjoy doing it. I kind of wish I'd done it more. I can't complain. I've had a fair crack of the whip. - Author: Ralph Brown
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #1547580
#32. The fact that I'm shouting that I have Gangnam style makes people crack up. Imagine if Brad Pitt was singing the song - would it be funny? A twist is important when it comes to writing lyrics. - Author: Psy
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #1774213
#33. Nobody should live in an environment that's not healthy. - Author: Brett Hull
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #1791703
#34. Performing comedy, you develop a rhythm of ideas and laughs. I live for it. - Author: Louis C.K.
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #1821004
#35. It's the cushiest job, but some lines are so funny that I crack up. - Author: Dan Castellaneta
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #1855712
#36. Let's see that wrist."
I held it out, and Chase's jaw tightened.
"Look at that!" the medic shouted, staring over my shoulder behind us. The moment I turned my head he grabbed my hand and jerked it toward him, hard.
A crack as the bones in my wrist realigned. - Author: Kristen Simmons
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #1857483
#37. I just thought everybody lived around abandoned buildings and crack-heads, ... I lived in the ghetto until I was like 19. I came to Los Angeles, stayed at hotels and stuff. When I got back and I saw what my neighborhood looked like, I started getting scared. - Author: Chris Rock
Crack Me Up Funny Quotes #1865593

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